"Rin..."
Obito Uchiha automatically ignored the faces of Kakashi and Minato in the framed photo above, focusing his entire existence on Rin Nohara.
"I feel... a little overwhelmed."
Just as Obito thought about trying to plant a secret kiss on the glossy paper, he hesitated. He remembered the last time Kakashi had walked in on him during a "private moment." The memory alone was a bucket of ice water.
He looked around the empty room. Coast clear.
Paranoid, he tore off a small piece of tape and stuck it over Kakashi's face. He didn't want to accidentally make eye contact with the Scarecrow while he was... expressing his feelings.
With the mood set, Obito picked up a tissue, intending to kiss Rin's photo without leaving any suspicious smudge marks.
It's fantasy time!
"Oh, Rin..."
Deeply moved by his own delusion, Obito couldn't help but call out her name aloud.
"Uh... Obito? I'm here."
To Obito's horror, someone responded.
And that voice was the very one he heard in his dreams.
'I'm finished!'
Obito's grip on the tissue tightened into a vice. His gaze moved slowly, painfully, toward the open window.
Two figures were standing there, perched on the sill.
One was Rin Nohara. The other was Kiyohara.
"Ahem. It's Rin and Kiyohara," Obito squeaked.
His ninja reflexes finally kicked in. He spun around, wiped his nose with the tissue as if he had a cold, and adopted a pose of casual indifference.
"What were you just doing, Obito?"
Kiyohara looked at the photo frame in Obito's hand. Even from this distance, he knew exactly what was happening.
"Nothing much! Just... reminiscing about the past," Obito stammered, his eyes darting to Kiyohara with a desperate plea for silence.
"You need to take care of your health, Obito. Practice some moderation," Kiyohara said earnestly. "Fantasizing is fine, but you'll go blind if you keep this up."
"Take care of his health?" Rin blinked, her innocent mind missing the implication entirely. "Is Obito sick?"
Obito's eyes bulged. "How can you slander my innocence out of thin air like that?!"
"Oh really? Weren't you secretly kissing Rin's photo?" Kiyohara gave a knowing, devilish smile.
'Frankly,' Kiyohara thought, 'Obito should apprentice under Jiraiya. One likes peeping into bathhouses, and the other likes getting intimate with inanimate objects.'
Obito's face flushed so red that steam practically erupted from his ears. Veins bulged on his forehead as he shouted:
"There was dust on the photo! I leaned down to blow the dust off! How can maintaining the sacred bond between comrades be called kissing?!"
Obito launched into a frantic speech about the Will of Fire, camaraderie, and the importance of dusting.
Rin giggled, assuming the boys were just joking around. The tension dissolved into a cheerful atmosphere.
"Obito, if we don't leave now, we'll delay the mission. Kakashi and Minato-sensei are waiting," Rin said, her smile bright enough to blind him.
Seeing no sign of disgust on her face, Obito finally relaxed. His glorious, heroic image was safe.
"I know!"
Obito turned around, threw on his marching pack, strapped on his tool pouch, and finally donned his signature orange goggles.
He had been ready for twenty minutes. He had just gotten... distracted.
"Let's go."
Rin hopped out the window to wait for him.
Obito placed the photo back on his nightstand. Just as he was about to grab a spare Kunai, Rin poked her head back in. She noticed the tape on the photo.
"Why is Kakashi's face covered?"
"Keeps the dust off him," Obito lied instantly.
"I see." Rin found it strange, but she nodded and left.
Kiyohara watched this sequence with a heavy heart.
'This should be the last time Obito has the chance to fantasize about Rin,' he thought grimly.
He looked at Obito's lower body.
'When the rock crushes him, it takes out his entire right side. If I recall correctly, the boulder splits him straight down the middle. He's definitely losing a testicle.'
'As for the sausage... that depends on if he dresses to the left or the right. Either way, once he's filled with White Zetsu matter, I doubt that function will ever return.'
"Let's go!"
Obito shouted a goodbye to his grandmother and leaped out the window, eager to start his legend. He noticed Kiyohara looking at his crotch with a gaze full of pity, which confused him deeply.
At the Main Gate of Konoha.
"You're late, Obito. Again."
Kakashi Hatake glared at the panting Uchiha.
"So what if I'm a little late?" Obito mumbled, adjusting his pack. "Is a few minutes really that big of a deal?"
"A ninja who breaks the rules is trash," Kakashi said, his voice cold and sharp. "Punctuality is a rule."
In Kakashi's current life credo, the Shinobi Code outweighed everything. His father, the White Fang, had chosen comrades over the mission and died in disgrace. Kakashi refused to make the same mistake.
"Alright, Kakashi, take it easy," Minato Namikaze stepped in, placing a hand on Kakashi's shoulder.
Minato knew the trauma behind Kakashi's rigidity. He offered a gentle smile to the group.
"During the mission, personal grievances must be set aside. The mission comes first," Minato said, his tone authoritative yet kind. "Also, this mission is highly classified. I will reveal the details once we reach the border."
Kiyohara listened from the back. He knew they were heading to Kusa (The Land of Grass), near the border of the Land of Earth (Iwa).
"By the way," Kiyohara projected his thought into the urn, "did the future me ever find a girlfriend?"
The urn shook slightly in his mental space. The spirit of the Missing-nin floated up.
"No. Just staying alive was a full-time job. I didn't have time for romance," the spirit sighed. "I tried, but the only women a Missing-nin meets are other criminals. And let's be honest, unless you look like Sasuke Uchiha, a girl isn't going to throw away her life to follow a fugitive."
"Is that so..."
Kiyohara looked at the tragic ghost of his future. 'I need to make sure my timeline is different.'
"Move out," Minato commanded.
The team vanished from the gate in a blur of motion.
The Journey.
The sun rose and set. Three days passed in a flash.
The group traveled through the dense forests of the Land of Fire. To maintain speed and avoid ground-level traps, they traveled exclusively through the canopy.
"We're finally almost there."
Kurenai Yuhi channeled chakra to the soles of her feet, using the momentum from a branch to launch herself forward. This method of travel, while faster, was draining on the stamina of a Genin.
"I wonder if we'll be able to complete the mission," Kurenai asked, glancing sideways at Kiyohara as they leaped through the air.
"We'll do our best," Kiyohara replied diplomatically.
'Though frankly,' he thought, 'mission failure just means a reprimand. Death is permanent.'
He thought about his paycheck. He received the standard Genin subsidy—roughly 3,000 Ryō a month plus mission pay.
'Why risk my life for minimum wage? They pay me 3,000, they get 3,000 worth of effort. Heroism is for people with better salaries.'
It was a cynical thought, but Kiyohara wasn't shackled by the Will of Fire. He was shackled by the desire to not die.
"Let's stop here."
Minato raised a hand, signaling a halt.
They landed at the edge of a vast expanse of grassland. The wind blew through the tall grass, making the field ripple like a green sea.
They had reached the border.
....
.....
.....
Support my patreon
patreon.com/ImmortalDaoWriter