Translator: penny
Chapter: 7
Chapter Title: Ghost Girl's Mansion (2)
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Time is of the essence when raiding a Gate.
One has to measure how long until a Dungeon Break occurs and raid it with at least a week to spare.
'If you haven't cleared it with a week left before the monsters emerge, the Association confiscates the Gate.'
Still, in reality, unless it's an exceptionally large place, a leisurely run takes about 4 to 5 hours to clear.
5 hours even if you take it slow. When I first heard this, I was f*cking surprised.
'Sh*t, removing a beehive would take longer than that.'
Max 5 hours to clear a Gate? Isn't that basically done in a flash?
'But what if that's live broadcast time?'
5 hours is a short time for a Gate raid. However, it isn't for the viewers.
'5 hours is definitely too long for a live broadcast.'
It's hard to spare 5 hours on a weekday just with a job. Moreover, raid broadcasts are the type that require concentration.
There isn't a viewer alive who would find it entertaining to watch the sorry sight of hunting monsters for 5 whole hours.
Maybe once or twice, but there are hundreds of raid videos out there.
Imagine if the entire list of raid videos were all that long. The barrier to entry would be sky-high.
'Netplus is like that too. It takes too much time, so you just end up not watching.'
Even I would scroll through the video list, get disgusted, and hit the back button.
'So, the time reduced as much as possible is roughly 3 hours.'
About 2 and a half to 3 hours. That is the average time it takes to raid a Gate.
The safety of the Hunters and the interest of the viewers. It's the average value adjusted to catch those two rabbits.
That was why.
- You're going to cut the Gate in 15 minutes?
- Is trash reporter dad already publishing fake news?
- Are you an A-Rank, Streamer?
The reaction from the viewers was beyond shock; it was disbelief.
"No, I'm F-Rank. Of course, my heart is S-Rank."
- Don't you mean Trash-Rank?
- Go retake mandatory Hunter education.
- Yeoto would spend 20 minutes just on commentary for the World 100m Dash Championship.
I really can't get used to this damn nickname. Maybe I should have just used my real name.
And I'm not a trash reporter, you bastards.
"You guys keep nitpicking. I am practically the conscience of this era of lies, yet you, the fans who came to watch me, have so little faith in me?"
- Well, we did come to see a crazy guy's face lol
- Fr lol We came to see the streamer get f*cked
"Thank you for that. Let's end the nonsense here."
Checking my watch, I shook my head.
"Speaking frankly, 15 minutes is f*cking tight. Even this time spent chatting is a waste, you know? You understood, roughly? I ask for your broad understanding and for you to shut your traps."
- You really are just the psycho we hoped for.
- No, the concentration of bullshit is thicker than I expected.
- World's first streamer who shuts up and raids a dungeon.
- The person opening a new meta in internet broadcasting.
Listening to them is making me lose my mind. Who are they calling a psycho? Seriously.
'Phew, let's stay calm. Maintaining the pace is important in a raid.'
I consciously relaxed and took a deep breath.
Why? Because I really intend to clear the Gate in 15 minutes.
[Time Remaining: 13 Minutes 20 Seconds.]
Already 2 minutes were consumed while moving and reacting to the chat. It was a mission where even I, who brought it up, couldn't see a glimmer of success.
Still, there was no anxiety.
'This Gate is on the shorter side, but that's not the only reason.'
The interior of the F-Rank Gate 'Ghost Girl's Mansion' is a cave.
Spiderwebs hung gloomily from the ceiling. As if to show whose nest this was.
As I advanced the undead for a while.
Splat-!
A ball of thread shot from the ceiling and hit a zombie.
'Above. And one from each side of the fork.'
I locked onto the enemies with the camera as soon as I noticed.
utilizing the experience I gained from rolling around controlling ghosts in an S-Rank guild, I displayed the monsters in both my field of vision and the broadcast screen.
- He got hit first!
- What is that camera reaction speed?
- Streamer dude is pretty good for trash-tier.
- Mobs coming down! Go El-chan!
Clatter, clatter-!
Making threatening noises, spiders nearly the size of bulls appeared on the ceiling and floor.
The monster appearing in the Ghost Girl's Mansion: the Noble Spider.
"Oh, it's monsters. This must be their habitat starting from here."
- Oh, it's monsters, my ass lol
- What is that tone lol Are you on a sightseeing tour? lol
- Is it okay for a Hunter to be this chill when mobs appear? lol
- Ah~ I'm broadcasting from my living room so I won't die~
- A chaotic collaboration of f*cking trash-tier ability and safety insensitivity.
- Trash bastard, aren't you going to organize your formation quickly!!
- If it's about 3 of them, no problem. Abandon the caught zombie, pull back the line, and mob them.
When I mumbled nonchalantly, the viewers got more excited and spammed the chat.
'And what's with the guy backseat gaming in the middle of this?'
Surprisingly, it was a standard strategy, so I was a bit impressed. Even if he read it on Namuwiki, it was valid.
'But if I do that, I can't clear it in 15 minutes.'
Shouldn't they have realized by now? That I'm a guy broadcasting with a crazy concept.
If I were going to do it by the book, I wouldn't have turned on the live stream. Checking the situation at the fork, I spoke.
"I'm taking a quick swish— look at the chat window, and judging by your tone, it seems you guys have been banned from chatting in games a few times, right? Thanks to that, I'm glad my explanation can be shorter."
- Ah lol Not a game addict but playing mind reader, amazing right?
- What's with the unemployed people popping up like bamboo shoots after rain?
- The guy calling others pathetic is the pathetic one. GG.
- No one said pathetic though...
- Unemployed bro... Stop being pathetic...
"Yes, I enjoyed the high-level debate. From now on, Yeoto, the genius Necromancer who insults even gods, will distribute a super honey tip on how to clear a Gate in 15 minutes for free."
For reference, this was a method comprised of facts that truly no one could refute.
A genius idea that could drastically shorten the clear time for anyone who puts it into practice.
Grinning, I gave an order to the zombies.
"Guys, sing a song as a self-introduction!"
[Carnival Zombie activates 'Mad Howling'!]
"Wuaaaaaaaahk!!"
As soon as the command fell, the zombies screamed eerie howls that would appear in a movie.
Summon: Carnival Zombie Platoon. A new skill I gained upon becoming a Voodoo Sorcerer.
When I first saw the name of this skill, I thought the word 'Carnival' meant cannibals.
'Isn't that obvious? Since they are zombies.'
But I realized it after actually summoning them. What the 'Carnival' attached to their name meant.
"Wuaaaaaaaahk!!"
"Wuaaaaaaaahk-!!"
"Urk urk ook aaah~!"
The zombies, who were screaming like something out of a horror movie, suddenly took positions with movements reminiscent of backup dancers.
Snap! Snap snap!
Then they started dancing to their own song.
"Urk urk ook~ ah~ ook!"
"Wuaaaaaahk! Guaaaaaahk!"
Zombies dancing cheerfully to shouts that had their own pitch and beat!
Since there were 10 of them united in body and spirit, their movements were perfectly synchronized group dancing. Hmm, if I debut them, I won't have to worry about starving.
Considering their faces had passed their expiration dates and turned into cheese, it was a dance worth watching.
Unfortunately, it seemed the viewers didn't think so.
- ???????????
- Gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahk!!!
- Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! Mamaaaa!!!
Viewers freaking out and expressing their shock in the chat!
Because the zombies are gross? Ey, surely not. They aren't even that ugly. This is just mild zombie movie level.
The viewers' screams and chaos stemmed from a different reason.
I also did a shoulder dance in the corner of the screen.
"If you've played some games, you know, right? How much the clear time changes depending on whether there is mob pulling or not when hunting."
Mad Howling was the zombies' only skill. A skill that draws the monsters' aggro.
Aggro concentration skill. In other words, the zombies were currently mob pulling.
'This is also famous as a skill that should absolutely never be used.'
That was why the viewers were appalled.
- Why are you gathering the mobs?! Does the Gate look like a joke to you?!
- If you get mobbed, even an A-Rank becomes a punching bag, you retard!!
Arbitrarily scraping together monsters! It was the most taboo act in Gate raiding.
Ah, of course, that's not my problem. I clapped my hands while laughing uproariously.
"Kuhaha! Why bother looking for monsters? If the tank pulls aggro, the mobs come to find you first! This is a paradigm shift, everyone!"
- Uwaaah, it's a crazy f*cking troll!!!!
- An F-Rank deep-sea dweller Necromancer is killing people!!
To suffer slander from the public that I didn't even suffer during my reporter days; is there another tragedy like this in the world?
Is this the bitter taste of reality? Santa Claus is dead.
No. My dad is alive and well, right? I shouldn't say he's dead. My job is a Voodoo Sorcerer, so a curse might fly out without me knowing.
I can't suddenly become a filial son of the flame attribute. Ahem.
"But why is everyone so excited? Uh, wait. Our zombies are getting beaten up by the mobs that came out first! Wait, time out! Time out! Hitting while dancing, really?!"
- You f*cking streamer, are you really crazy?
- Does this bastard have ADHD?
- The background behind the streamer wasn't a home but a mental hospital.
- Do you not know why Hunters don't do mob pulling?
"Huh? Well, they don't do it because people die at the drop of a hat."
I answered while urgently controlling the zombies. Who doesn't know that? Do they think I'm a fool?
'The most important thing in a Gate raid is safety.'
Like the Charlotte Guild, recklessly breaking a Gate and having someone die or get hurt must absolutely never happen.
It's not just the Hunters who think that way. It was the same from the perspective of Guild Masters and investors.
'Even if you succeed 100 times, one failure is a catastrophe.'
Just one slip-up and the guild stock price is confirmed to plummet.
Even success is a problem. It's obviously a reckless act. You'd be criticized for disregarding the lives of the raid members.
'We do this to make a living, so what's the point if we die?'
Fight risking your life because you need to earn some money?
Is this modern Europe or something? Do you want to see the Hunter Union boycott?
'Mob pulling during a live broadcast where human lives are at stake and safety is paramount? You can never do it with a sane mind.'
That is why mob pulling was a taboo in Gate raiding.
We know it's efficient. But we dare not attempt it.
In a normal guild, that is. Ehehe.
- Would someone who knows that do this shit? Is he really a troll???
"I do it because I know? I'm working from home, so I won't die."
- Trash mindset just like the standard of a troll.
- ?
- Wait a sec?
- Come to think of it, the streamer bastard really won't die?
Oh? It seemed some people were slowly catching on. Starting with them, the public opinion in the chat window changed.
- If he's raiding alone, isn't it not even trolling?
- The raid members are all summons anyway, so no one gets hurt.
The viewers finally realized the answer. I feel almost sorry there's no prize.
Of course, there is no need to be disappointed. Why? If it were a quiz, it would have already been time over.
Still, being broad-minded, I understood everything. Breaking stereotypes isn't easy, after all.
"Yes, that's right. As you all know, there are no people in our raid team."
I re-emphasized so the viewers wouldn't forget. That one shouldn't look for common sense in my broadcast.
"What does this mean? Correct! Even if I fail spectacularly while mob pulling, I won't die or get hurt; that's what I'm saying!"
How is it? This perfect logic.
Even if Socrates came back to life as my dancing zombie, he wouldn't be able to refute it. Zombies can't talk, you see.
'If I just pull mobs, catching the trash mobs takes only 5 minutes.'
If this were other Hunters, they would have had to carefully roam the dungeon and search every corner for monsters.
But that's a ridiculous notion.
"Since we're doing it, let's go hot. Hot and fiery."
A trash mob search operation that takes hours? Bullshit, right? How dare you bring such a petty method to me.
"Hahahaha! I have never experienced fear. Because I don't die!"
- El-chan dies, you f*cker.
- No one is worried about your life. GG.
- You break the Gate with zombies and leave the broadcast to El-chan, you leech bastard ^^
"Yeah~ Keep talking to the monitor all day~ This is my broadcast~ I don't even listen to what you guys say~"
- Communication refusal ability level of a conglomerate chairman;;
- Did you make your eardrums less when undergoing meiosis in your mom's womb?
Ding ding ding-! All sorts of curses poured out in the chat window.
Why on earth? Isn't this the timing where praise for my genius should be coming out?
Man, the thoughts of fools are impossible to understand. I lamented the disastrous literacy rate of Korea.
"Phew, as expected, the era hasn't caught up to me yet."
- If an era that catches up to you comes, that's the Apocalypse.
- Madness ten thousand years too early for humanity.
- These genes should have been naturally selected out in the Paleolithic era.
Of course, I didn't even blink at the clumsy swearing.
Insignificant brats. Malicious comments of your level can't leave a single scratch on Jeong Do-jin, who realized human malice while watching the keyboard-assassination techniques of trash reporters.
- El-chan, please pay the penalty fee and find another employer.
"If the contract is terminated, I just have to unsummon and summon again."
- Master of TV scoop gaslighting.
- The employment laws of the Republic of Korea... have ended service...
Yeoto Entertainment Inc. is a lifetime contract. Action Beam to your condolences!
Rumble-!!!!
Ah, sh*t. This wasn't the time to be playing around.
'They were drawn by the zombies' aggro. Did it take about a minute?'
The footsteps of mobs approaching while shaking the cave!
While chatting, I took care of the 3 that came out beforehand. Listening to the sound, there must be at least 10 or more.
'Judging by the Gate's difficulty, excluding the Boss Monster, the number of Noble Spiders is around 20.'
It seems all the remaining Noble Spiders have poured out. In contrast, we are 11. We are at a disadvantage in numbers.
'But we have a Named Summon.'
Our raid team's main dealer, El Ayla.
In fact, the 3 that attacked first had been stabbed and flipped over dead while I was talking.
"Zombies, stop dancing and form a line! Use your bodies to hold out so El Ayla can deal damage!"
Hearing the footsteps, I hurriedly gave instructions.
Actually, the distance is so far that verbal instructions have no meaning, but the viewers need to hear it, right? This is all professional showmanship.
- What kind of strategy is holding out with bodies until dying lol
- He makes a sh*tty strategy since he won't die.
- If the zombies' brains were less rotten, this would be a coup d'état, for real.
- "Shut your traps, know-nothings! My zombies don't have the intelligence for a Révolution!"
- First time I've heard a Hunter tell someone to shut their trap.
- lul F*cking fresh, I admit.
Deploying zombies as meat shields was unavoidable.
Zombie Platoon is literally a Platoon. Mass quantity undead where 10 pop out with 1 summon! Naturally, the stats of a single one were on the low side.
'The only things worth noting are toughness and strength.'
Considering that toughness is frankly closer to 'moving obstinately until the head is smashed because it's an undead hehe', each one belongs to the weak side.
'Their intelligence is low too, so they don't understand difficult commands. Do you know how frustrating it is for me giving orders?'
I almost got cancer when I did a test run. I gave up on strategic operation in 5 minutes, so that says it all.
"Haaaaalt— in!!!! Place!!!!"
"Ack!!"
So, there is only one proper way to operate these guys.
"Launch a powerful shout forward for 10 seconds!!!!"
"Wuaaaaaaaahk!!!!"
"Wuaaaaaaaahk!!!!"
Pulling aggro like crazy while patching up the line with their bodies.
These guys were a tanker unit specialized only in that.