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Chapter 22 - "I'm Your Idiot." Gojo Crashes the Kyoto Date!

Kyoto – Arashiyama District (One Hour Later)

If silence was Miyuki Arima's armor, then the Tokyo students were a sledgehammer designed to crack it open.

"Ice cream! Green tea ice cream!" Yuji Itadori shouted, pointing at a vendor near the Togetsukyo Bridge. "Arima-san, you have to try it! It's the law when you're in Kyoto!"

"I live here, Yuji-kun," Miyuki said, adjusting her round sunglasses as she was dragged along the cobblestone path. "I've had the ice cream."

"But have you had it with us?" Nobara Kugisaki countered, linking her arm through Miyuki's. "Everything tastes better when you're not depressing alone in a library. Besides, we need to eat fast. We have..." She checked her watch nervously. "...about two hours of peace left."

"Two hours?" Miyuki asked, accepting the cone Yuji thrust into her hand. "Until what?"

"Until the Apocalypse arrives via public transport," Megumi muttered from her other side. He was holding three shopping bags that Nobara had thrust upon him, looking like a weary pack mule. "Gojo-sensei is on the train."

Miyuki stopped walking. The ice cream dripped onto her hand. "He's coming?"

"He's coming," Yuji confirmed, looking terrified. "But he promised to take the slow train! So we have time to have fun! We have to cram a whole weekend of fun into two hours! Let's go!"

"Recovering from being surrounded by idiots," Megumi muttered, urging them forward. "Why did we invite Todo again?"

"We didn't," Yuji mumbled, his mouth full of soft serve. "I just... sort of... sent a picture to the group chat? The one labeled 'Brotherhood'?"

"You didn't," Megumi groaned.

"I did. He said he was close."

As if summoned by the sheer chaos of the universe, a shadow fell over them. The ground shook rhythmically.

THUD. THUD. THUD.

Tourists gasped. People parted like the Red Sea. A massive figure, shirtless despite the cool autumn breeze, wearing purple pants and a smile that could frighten a Special Grade curse, came sprinting down the street.

"ARIMA MIYUKI!"

The roar echoed off the mountains. Aoi Todo skidded to a halt in front of them, dust billowing from his heels. He ignored his friends. He ignored the terrified tourists. His eyes were locked on Miyuki with a terrifying, religious intensity.

"MY GODDESS!" Todo bellowed, tears streaming down his face. "I RECEIVED THE SUMMONS! I SPRINTED FROM THE KYOTO DORMITORIES! I DID NOT EVEN STOP FOR PROTEIN!"

Miyuki took a step back, instinctively hiding behind Megumi. "Hello, Todo-kun. Please put a shirt on. We are in public."

"CLOTHES ARE A PRISON FOR THE SOUL!" Todo declared, flexing his pectorals so hard his veins popped. "BUT FOR YOU, I WILL COMPLY!"

He whipped a t-shirt out of his pocket—it had a picture of Takada-chan on it—and pulled it over his head.

"Brother!" Todo slapped Yuji on the back, nearly sending the boy face-first into his ice cream. "Excellent choice of location! The bamboo forest! The river! It is the perfect setting for romance and battle!"

"Just hanging out today, Todo," Yuji corrected, wiping matcha from his nose. "We're going to the arcade park near the station. We need to win Arima-san a prize before He gets here."

"A timed mission?" Todo's eyes lit up. He turned to Miyuki. "A contest of skill against the clock! Perfect! I shall win you a prize worthy of your height and intellect! Come! We march!"

He marched ahead, clearing the path with his sheer presence.

Miyuki looked at the trio, who were already hurrying after him.

"Is he always like this?" she asked.

"Usually he's louder," Nobara said, patting Miyuki's shoulder. "Just ignore the 'goddess' stuff. He's harmless. Mostly."

Miyuki looked at the chaotic group in front of her. The static in her head was still there, but for the first time, the laughter of the students was louder than the noise.

"Two hours," she whispered to herself.

She took a bite of her ice cream.

"Let's make them count."

The Arcade – Two Hours Later

The arcade was a sensory nightmare of neon lights, electronic jingles, and the aggressive clatter of plastic buttons being mashed by teenagers.

To Miyuki, whose Six Eyes were still recovering from weeks of overload, it should have been hell. The visual information was dense, chaotic, and screaming for attention.

But surprisingly, she wasn't drowning.

The sheer, unadulterated joy of the students acted as a filter. Their positive energy—Yuji's blinding brightness, Nobara's fierce delight, Megumi's quiet amusement—formed a barrier around her. It drowned out the static of the world, leaving only the fun.

"BEHOLD!" Todo Aoi screamed, standing in front of a punch-strength machine. "THE FIST OF PURE LOVE!"

He wound up. He didn't use a drop of cursed energy—that would be cheating (and illegal)—but he used pure, unadulterated muscle mass.

WHAM.

The machine groaned. The leather pad nearly flew off. The numbers spun so fast they blurred into a red streak.

999.

The high score bell rang, lights flashing wildly.

"Top that, Brother!" Todo grinned, sweating slightly, flexing a bicep that was larger than Miyuki's head.

Yuji cracked his knuckles, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "You're on!"

He stepped up. He didn't have Todo's mass, but he had the raw, superhuman strength that defied biology. He threw a casual, snappy jab.

CRACK.

The machine's casing is dented.

999.

"A TIE!" Todo roared, hugging Yuji so hard his spine cracked. "AS EXPECTED OF MY BROTHER! WE ARE EQUALS IN POWER! WE MUST CELEBRATE WITH MEAT!"

"Can you two stop destroying public property?" Megumi sighed, holding a small plush dog he had won from a claw machine on his first try. He checked his phone nervously. "We have forty minutes before the train arrives."

"Plenty of time!" Nobara called out. "Hey, Miyuki! Look at this!"

Miyuki walked over to a shooting game where Nobara was currently obliterating digital zombies with frightening precision.

"Want to try?" Nobara offered the orange plastic gun.

"I... I don't really play games," Miyuki admitted, adjusting her sunglasses. "I'm more of a... book person."

"It's easy. Just point and shoot," Nobara said, a wicked grin spreading across her face. "Pretend they're Gojo-sensei."

Miyuki blinked. She looked at the zombie on the screen. She imagined a black blindfold on it.

She laughed. A real, bubbling sound.

She took the gun. She focused. She didn't use the Six Eyes to calculate the trajectory—she didn't need to. She just used her natural hand-eye coordination and a month's worth of repressed frustration.

Bang. Bang. Bang.

"Headshot! Headshot! ULTRA COMBO!" the machine announced in a robotic voice.

"Whoa," Yuji whistled, coming over to watch. "You're a natural, Arima-san!"

Miyuki blew imaginary smoke from the plastic barrel, striking a pose. "I'm a librarian, Yuji-kun. We have to be precise with our stamps. If you miss the line, the catalogue is ruined."

"ATTENTION!" Todo's voice cut through the noise like a foghorn.

He was standing in front of the largest prize counter. He slammed a mountain of paper tickets onto the desk—tickets he and Yuji had won by dominating every machine in the building in record time.

"I DEMAND THE LARGEST PRIZE!" Todo shouted at the terrified attendant, a teenage boy who looked like he wanted to be anywhere else. "THE GIANT PANDA! IT IS FOR THE LADY!"

The attendant nervously handed over a plush panda that was the size of a small car. It was ridiculously round and soft.

Todo hefted it onto his shoulder and marched over to Miyuki. He presented it like a samurai presenting the head of a warlord to his daimyo.

"FOR YOU!" Todo announced, bowing low. "A BEAST AS MAJESTIC AS YOUR SPIRIT! IT IS SOFT, YET FIRM! JUST LIKE MY RESOLVE!"

Miyuki stared at the giant panda. It was ridiculous. It was fluffy. It was bigger than her apartment door.

"Thank you, Todo-kun," she said, genuinely touched. She patted the panda's giant head. "It's... very big."

"WE SHALL NAME IT TAKADA-CHAN THE SECOND!"

"Let's stick with 'Panda'," Megumi suggested dryly. "Panda-senpai might get jealous otherwise. And he hits hard."

They laughed.

For the first time in weeks, Miyuki threw her head back and laughed until her ribs hurt. She felt light. She felt young. She felt like the darkness of the last month—the Kamo clan, the fear, the suffocating love of a god—was a million miles away.

The Shadow on the Roof

Across the street, perched on the edge of a billboard advertising a hostess club called 'Velvet Kiss', Toji Fushiguro watched.

He sat with one leg dangling over the edge, peeling a green apple with the Inverted Spear of Heaven. The blade, designed to kill gods, sliced through the fruit skin with surgical ease.

"Look at them," he muttered, taking a bite of the apple slice. "Playing house."

To his Heavenly Restricted senses, the group below was a bonfire of sensory input. The Old Vessel was a blazing sun. The Ten Shadows user was a deep, shadowy pool. The girl with the hammer was a sparking flint. And the big one... well, he was just loud.

But Miyuki...

Miyuki was different. Even from here, Toji could feel the static of the Six Eyes buzzing around her. But today, the buzz was quieter. The frantic, jagged edges of her cursed energy had smoothed out.

She was hugging the giant panda. She was laughing.

Toji paused, the knife hovering over the apple.

He remembered that smile. Not on her, but on her. His wife used to smile like that when she watched Megumi sleep. A smile that said the world was terrible, and we are all going to die, but this specific moment right now is okay.

"Don't get used to it," Toji whispered to the distant figure of the librarian. "Happiness makes you soft. And soft things die."

He took another bite, chewing slowly.

Suddenly, his eyes shifted to the left.

Three blocks away, on a lower rooftop, he sensed a faint disturbance. A heartbeat that was trying very hard not to be heard. A scout from the Kamo clan, positioning a bow.

Toji sighed. The apple wasn't even finished.

He stood up, sheathing the jagged knife at his waist.

"Can't even eat a snack in peace," he grumbled. "Kids these days have no respect for lunch breaks."

He didn't look back at Miyuki. He didn't need to. He knew she was safe for exactly as long as he decided she was.

He vanished from the billboard, a blur of speed moving to intercept the threat before the happy children even knew they were being hunted.

The Arrival of the Strongest Nuisance

The peace lasted exactly one hour and forty-two minutes.

They were sitting on a bench near the bamboo grove, surrounded by the spoils of their arcade war. Miyuki was sandwiched between Nobara and Yuji, clutching her giant panda like a shield. Megumi was sitting silently, and Todo was flexing his pectorals at a passing deer.

Then, the air changed.

It wasn't a gradual shift. It was instantaneous. The birds stopped singing. The wind died down. The ambient static in Miyuki's head, which had been a dull hum, suddenly screamed like a feedback loop.

"Well, well, well!"

A voice, sweet as poisoned honey, drifted down from the sky.

"What a cute little family picnic! Did you save a seat for Papa?"

Miyuki stiffened. Yuji dropped his dango. Nobara immediately reached for her hammer.

They looked up. Floating about ten feet in the air, legs crossed casually as if he were sitting in an invisible armchair, was Gojo Satoru.

He was wearing his high-collared uniform, his blindfold replaced by round, dark sunglasses that did absolutely nothing to hide the terrifying blue gaze burning behind them. He held a plastic bag from a convenience store in one hand.

"Gojo," Miyuki whispered. Her heart hammered against her ribs—half in terror, half in a treacherous, aching relief.

"Miyuki-chan!" Gojo beamed, descending slowly until his boots hovered an inch above the gravel. "You look terrible! Did you miss me that much?"

He stepped forward, his arms spreading wide, clearly intending to scoop her up (and likely warp her straight back to Tokyo).

"I'm going to hug you now, and then we're going to have a very long talk about running away from home—"

CLACK.

Gojo stopped.

A hammer was pointed directly at his chest.

"One more step," Nobara Kugisaki said, her eyes blazing with protective fury, "and I will ruin this shirt. It looks expensive."

Gojo blinked. He looked down at the hammer, then at Nobara. "Nobara, surely you don't think a nail can stop Infinity?"

"No," Megumi said, stepping in front of Miyuki from the left. He summoned his Divine Dog, which growled low in its throat. "But it will make a scene. And you hate paperwork."

"Sensei!" Yuji jumped in front of Miyuki from the right, spreading his arms wide like a human shield. "You promised! No kidnapping! We are just eating snacks!"

Gojo stared at his students. His own students. The children he had raised, trained, and occasionally traumatized were now forming a literal phalanx around the woman he... well, the woman he needed.

He let out a sharp, incredulous laugh.

"This is a mutiny," Gojo declared, looking delighted and furious at the same time. "I am being bullied by teenagers."

He leaned to the side, trying to peer past Yuji's shoulder to see Miyuki.

"Miyuki! Are you going to let them treat me like this? I brought you Yatsuhashi! The cinnamon kind you like!"

Miyuki didn't look at him. She focused intently on the giant panda's black eye.

"I'm not hungry," she said, her voice cool and steady, though her hands were trembling in the panda's fur. "And Yuji is right. You're crowding me."

"Crowding you?" Gojo's smile dropped a fraction. The air temperature plummeted five degrees. "I traveled three hundred kilometers on a public train next to a man eating egg salad. I think I deserve a hello."

"Hello, Gojo," Miyuki said flatly. "Goodbye, Gojo."

"Ouch." Gojo clutched his chest dramatically. "Cold! So cold! You used to be warmer when you were crying in my office."

"And you used to be quieter when you weren't having a midlife crisis," Miyuki shot back, finally looking up to glare at him.

The students gasped. Yuji looked back and forth between them as if watching a tennis match played with grenades.

Gojo's lips quirked up. He liked that. He liked the fire.

"Touché," he murmured, taking a step closer. The Infinity pushed gently against Yuji, forcing the boy back a millimeter. "But seriously. Move, Yuji. I need to check her vitals. She looks pale. The Six Eyes are draining her."

"I AM HER VITALS CHECK!"

A massive shadow eclipsed the sun.

Aoi Todo stepped in front of the entire group, blocking Gojo's view completely with his sheer width.

"GOJO SATORU!" Todo bellowed, crossing his massive arms. "YOU ARE DISTURBING THE LADY'S DIGESTION!"

Gojo looked at Todo with genuine disgust. "Todo. Why are you here? Go away. Go find a tall woman with a big ass and leave mine alone."

"MISS ARIMA IS THE GODDESS OF INTELLECT!" Todo roared, tears of passion streaming down his face. "SHE DOES NOT REQUIRE YOUR CORRUPT SORCERY! I, AOI TODO, HAVE ALREADY WIPED HER FACE WITH A NAPKIN! SHE IS IN PEAK CONDITION!"

Gojo froze.

The silence that followed was deafening.

"You..." Gojo's voice dropped to a dangerous, low frequency. The cursed energy around him began to crackle visibly. "...wiped her face?"

"IT WAS MATCHA SAUCE!" Todo confirmed proudly. "I WAS GENTLE!"

"I'm going to kill him," Gojo stated calmly. "I am going to hollow purple this gorilla into the sun."

"No killing!" Yuji tackled Todo's waist to hold him back. "Todo, stop provoking him! Sensei, stop charging your laser!"

"Miyuki," Gojo ignored them, stepping around the chaos to get a clear line of sight. He was close now. Too close. The smell of his expensive cologne hit her like a drug.

"Look at me," he commanded softly.

Miyuki looked. God, she hated how good he looked. Even with the ridiculous sunglasses, even with the manic energy, he was beautiful. And he looked... tired. Under the arrogance, there were lines of exhaustion around his mouth that hadn't been there yesterday.

"You look like a mess," Miyuki said, her voice betraying a hint of softness.

"You left," Gojo replied simply. "Everywhere is too quiet."

"It's peaceful," she corrected.

"It's boring." Gojo reached out a hand. He wanted to touch her cheek. He wanted to verify that she was real and not just a concept he had hallucinated.

Nobara's hammer tapped his wrist. Not hard, but a warning.

"Don't," Nobara warned. "She's not a pet, Sensei. If she wants to touch you, she will."

Gojo paused. His hand hovered in the air, inches from Miyuki's face. The Infinity hummed between them—an infinite distance that he could cross, but chose not to.

He looked at Miyuki. Waiting. Daring her. Begging her.

Miyuki stared at his hand. She remembered how that hand had choked her with protection. She also remembered how it had held her when she was shaking.

She didn't reach out.

Instead, she took a bite of her dango, maintaining eye contact.

"Go home, Satoru," she whispered, using his first name like a weapon. "The train leaves in twenty minutes. Don't miss it."

Gojo's eyes widened behind his glasses. The use of his given name sent a jolt through him that was stronger than any cursed technique.

He slowly lowered his hand. A slow, dangerous smirk spread across his face.

"Oh, I'm not going home," Gojo purred. He walked over to the vending machine, leaned against it, and crossed his long legs. "I bought a return ticket for tomorrow."

He pointed a finger at Todo, then at the panda.

"I'm joining the field trip. And I'm going to win you a bigger panda than that ugly thing. Just to prove a point."

"It's not a competition!" Megumi groaned, rubbing his temples.

"Everything is a competition, Megumi!" Gojo laughed, though his eyes remained fixed on Miyuki with possessive intensity. "And I never lose."

Miyuki sighed, leaning back against the bench. She felt the headache returning, but strangely, she didn't reach for her pills.

"You're an idiot," she muttered.

"But I'm your idiot," Gojo winked. "Now, who wants to watch me beat Todo at Dance Dance Revolution? The loser has to leave Kyoto forever!"

"I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE!" Todo screamed.

As the chaotic group moved toward the arcade, Miyuki stayed seated for a moment. She watched Gojo's back as he bickered with Yuji.

He was infuriating. He was dangerous. He was a lot.

But he had taken the train.

She hid a small smile behind her dango.

One point for the idiot.

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