wasn't the conversations that changed.
It was the moments in between.
Keifer and Ivy didn't talk much more than before, but they started noticing each other.
A smile across the corridor.
A pause when their eyes met.
A shared look that lingered a second longer than necessary.
Jay saw all of it.
She pretended she didn't.
Every time Ivy spotted Keifer, her face lit up without permission.
Every time Keifer noticed Ivy, his lips curved into an easy, unguarded smile.
It was harmless.
But it hurt.
One afternoon, Ivy flopped onto Jay's bed, hugging a pillow to her chest.
"I think I'm falling harder," Ivy admitted, staring at the ceiling.
Jay stayed quiet. "For Keifer?"
Ivy nodded, smiling shyly. "Yeah."
Jay's heart twisted.
"He doesn't even have to say anything," Ivy continued.
"Just the way he smiles when he sees me… it makes my whole day better."
Jay swallowed.
"I know it sounds silly," Ivy said quickly. "But I feel safe around him."
Safe.
That word landed like a bruise.
Jay forced herself to listen. To nod. To be the best friend she had always been.
"He's just… good," Ivy said softly.
"Sometimes I want to tell him everything I feel. Sometimes I'm scared I already am, without words."
Jay's fingers clenched into the bedsheet.
Because Ivy wasn't wrong.
Keifer was good.
And Jay had always known that.
"Ivy," Jay said carefully, "are you happy?"
Ivy smiled, wide and hopeful. "More than I've been in a long time."
Jay smiled back.
It felt like lying.
From then on, Ivy told her everything.
How her heart raced when Keifer walked past.
How she replayed his smiles at night.
How just seeing him across campus made the day lighter.
Jay listened.
Every single time.
And every single time, something inside her tightened.
Her chest ached in ways she didn't understand.
Her thoughts turned sharp, possessive, unkind.
Why does she get that smile?
Why does he look at her like that?
Jay hated herself for thinking it.
One evening, they sat together in the common room, Ivy talking excitedly.
"He held the door for me today," Ivy said, laughing softly.
"And he waited. Like he wasn't in a rush at all."
Jay nodded. "He does that."
"I know," Ivy said. "But it felt… special."
Jay's heart twisted again.
Because for Jay, it had always been special.
She remembered scraped knees, late-night talks, shared secrets.
She remembered being the first person he looked for in a room.
And now she was watching someone else step into that space.
"I don't know what I'll do if he ever likes someone else," Ivy said quietly.
Jay's breath caught.
"Funny, right?" Ivy added, smiling sadly. "I already feel like I'd lose him, even though I never had him."
Jay looked away.
Because she felt the same.
Only worse.
Because Jay had him.
And she was realizing she could lose him.
That night, Jay lay awake, staring at the ceiling.
Keifer's smile replayed in her mind.
Not the one he gave everyone.
The one he gave her.
And for the first time, fear outweighed denial.
This wasn't just jealousy.
This wasn't just discomfort.
This was love she had buried too deep, waking up angry and afraid.
And no matter how much she tried to be strong for Ivy—
Every time Keifer's name was spoken,
Her heart twisted.
Again.
And again.
Because loving him silently was starting to hurt more than admitting it ever could.