We set off immediately after breakfast. As we traveled, I realized just how lucky I was to have Clementine with me.
"You really saved my skin back there. I didn't realize you were that strong."
I swallowed the urge to call her a "glutton" and chose to praise her instead.
"Hehe! I told you, I've got one foot in the realm of heroes! I'm not losing to the local wildlife around here."
We had encountered a steady stream of fantasy staples: goblins, frenzied wolves, and even man-eating ogres. Clementine had repelled almost all of them. According to her, her style relied on "Martial Arts"—a technique that didn't exist in Yggdrasil—to enhance her speed. She utilized a high-speed hit-and-run tactic, delivering lethal thrusts before the enemy could even react. Watching her kick off trees and rocks, darting across the battlefield with impossible agility, was a testament to her power.
"But seriously... don't ever do that again. I thought I was going to die. It was humiliating."
"I am truly, deeply sorry about that."
Clementine was no longer wearing her bikini-armor and robe. She was now dressed in a suit of light leather armor I'd provided. There was a very specific reason for the wardrobe change.
Earlier, when we were surrounded by goblins and ogres, Clementine hadn't had enough room to build up her speed. Sensing danger, I had activated my racial ultimate skill: Everything Becomes Ingredients.
In the game, this skill summoned a massive cauldron that would target anything with a level lower than my effective combat level. Since I was Level 100 with a Cookman's massive stat penalty, my combat level was treated as Level 50. Anything Level 50 or below would be forcibly pulled into the pot to be "cooked." It was a guaranteed instant-kill move, but it was also a "joke" skill. It involved three stages—suction, cooking, and finishing—and if I took damage or a stage failed, the whole thing was canceled. It was a once-a-day gamble.
The goblins and ogres were sucked into the pot, their equipment dissolving as they were processed into ingredients. But then...
"HELP MEEEEE!"
"CLEMENTINE?!"
I had screamed in horror as Clementine, caught in the wake of a tumbling ogre, was sucked into the cauldron along with them. I watched in a panic as her already minimal armor began to dissolve. I managed to pull her out at the very last second, but she was left in little more than shreds. If I had been a moment slower, she would have been stark naked—or worse, a side dish. I felt terrible about the whole ordeal.
"This armor isn't bad, but it doesn't really fit my style," she remarked, adjusting the leather straps.
"If I manage to find Momonga, I'll ask if he has any spare gear that fits you better."
The armor I gave her was a standard full-set, which hindered her speed-based combat. But as a Cookman, most of my inventory was specialized chef's gear. This was the only "normal" protection I had.
"Regardless, that skill is officially banned. It didn't even give me real food."
"Agreed. That was way too weird."
Despite the name, the skill had produced a strange result this time. Instead of meat or vegetables, the pot had spat out bottles of potions and strength enhancers. I was disappointed to find only minor healing potions among the loot. Why a cooking skill produced pharmaceutical items, I had no idea. It was too dangerous to use around allies, and the risk of accidentally stripping everyone in the vicinity was too high. I swore never to use it again.
"Is that it? Carne Village?"
I spotted a cluster of buildings in the distance. It looked like a modest settlement.
"Yeah, that's it," Clementine noted, her playful tone shifting to something sharper. "But it's awfully quiet. I wonder if bandits hit the place?"
"Bandits? Is that common?"
She explained that while the area was usually safe because it fell under the territory of a monster known as the Wise King of the Forest, human raiders were always a possibility. Between the combat and the walking, I was exhausted. I had even made speed-boosting sandwiches to help us reach the village before sunset. Without them, we would have been stuck in the woods overnight.
The Cookman penalties are brutal, I thought. My HP was high, but my attack and defense were nonexistent. If bandits were a threat, I'd need to find items to compensate for my lack of power.
"Don't worry, Kawasaki! I'll protect you."
"That's a little depressing to hear, but I'll count on you. In return, I'll make sure your next meal is top-tier."
"Deal!" she chirped.
I really was lucky to have met her. As a backline support class—or rather, a "base-only" class—having a front-line warrior as a companion was a godsend. We adjusted our pace and headed for the village gates.
***
"MONSTER!" the villagers screamed the moment they saw me.
"I'm not a monster!" I yelled back. Well, I was a heteromorph, but being called a monster the second someone saw me was a blow to my confidence.
"He's not a monster! He's a demi-human!" Clementine shouted, stepping forward to vouch for me. "He's a chef. Honestly, do you really think a human woman like me would be traveling with a mindless beast?"
The villagers hesitated. A few muttered that it made sense, but others whispered about whether or not I ate humans.
"Are you kidding me?!" I snapped. "Why would I eat people when I can cook for them? I want people to enjoy my food, not be my food!"
The crowd flinched at my outburst, but then a man with a sturdy build stepped forward.
"Forgive my people," he said, though his eyes still held a trace of fear. "I am the village chief. What business do you have with our village?"
He led us toward his home. As we walked, I noticed the signs of destruction.
There aren't many people left, and the houses are in ruins.
The number of inhabitants didn't match the number of homes. Clementine was right; they had been attacked. The atmosphere was heavy, lacking any trace of vitality.
"I'm searching for my companions," I explained to the chief. "But as you can see, I'm not built for long-distance travel. I'd like to rent a horse or a carriage. I can pay."
"I would help you if I could," the chief sighed. "But only a few days ago, soldiers from the Baharuth Empire raided us. They... they slaughtered our livestock. And our people."
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked."
"No, you couldn't have known." He managed a weak smile, but I couldn't just leave it at that.
"Chief, would you let me use the village square?"
"The square?" He looked confused.
"Kawasaki, are you going to cook?" Clementine asked.
"You bet. I'm a chef. Let me prepare a meal for the village."
"But... we have no money to pay for such a service," the chief said hurriedly.
"I don't want your money," I laughed. "When people are hungry, they get depressed. When they're depressed, they dwell on the bad things. If you want to live, you have to eat. I want to give the survivors a proper meal. That's all."
It was a selfish request, in a way. Back in the real world, I couldn't even feed myself properly, let alone others. But here, I had the ingredients. I had enough to feed everyone.
"It's not for free, though!" Clementine added, whispering to me that "free" would only make them suspicious. "We need a place to stay for the night, and we want to hear whatever information you have about the surrounding area. Is that a fair trade?"
The chief's expression softened once a price was set. "If that is the case, we have a house that was relatively untouched. I will also provide a map, though it is a simple one. Will that suffice?"
"It's a deal," I said, following him out to the square.
***
"Whoa, Kawasaki! What are you making in that huge pot?"
I was busy pulling cookware and ingredients from my item box.
"When you're feeding a crowd in a place like this, there's only one choice."
I laid out the ingredients: two kilograms of sliced Wing Pork shoulder, seven onions, twenty potatoes, eight burdock roots, ten blocks of konjac, eight carrots, five radishes, and twenty taros. And for the finishing touch... white miso. My personal favorite for this dish.
"It feeds a lot of people and it's packed with vegetables. It has to be Pork and Vegetable Miso Soup."
I could have made curry if I had enough rice, but with forty people to feed, a hearty soup was the better option. A warm, nutrient-dense broth filled with ingredients was the ultimate comfort food.
"This is a big job. Clementine, help me out. Just prep the vegetables."
"Ugh, seriously? I've never cooked in my life!"
She looked pathetic, so I laughed and handed her an apron and a knife. The villagers watched us with wary curiosity.
"I'll handle the seasoning. You just help with the chopping. Start with the pork."
Wing Pork was an A-rank ingredient. Like the name suggested, these pigs could actually fly. They were timid and notoriously difficult to catch unless you had a ranger like Peroroncino with you. The meat provided buffs to strength, vitality, and health regeneration—perfect for warriors.
"Cut them into bite-sized pieces. About three centimeters."
"How much is three centimeters?"
Right, this was a fantasy world. They probably didn't use the metric system. I showed her a piece I'd already cut to use as a guide. I decided to go with two kilograms instead of the usual 1.2 to make sure everyone was full.
"Alright, let's get to work!"
"Fiiiine..." she groaned, but she started cutting. Seeing a pile of fresh meat being prepared in the open air caught the villagers' attention. They began to gather, whispering excitedly about the feast.
"I'll peel the vegetables. You just keep slicing. I'll show you how once, then you copy me."
Peeling with a knife required a specific technique, so I took over that duty. "Do you know the 'cat's paw' grip?"
"The what?"
I realized I'd have to start from the basics. I tried to demonstrate how to tuck my fingers in to avoid cutting them, but...
"Like... this..."
"I don't get it."
Dammit! My Cookman hands were too round. I couldn't make the grip properly. I sighed, sliced some carrots and radishes into rounds, and stepped behind her.
"Hold the vegetable like this. If the knife slips, it hits your knuckles instead of your fingertips. As you cut, move your hand back slowly. Got it?"
"I... I think so. I'll try."
She was hesitant, but she'd get the hang of it. I took over the onions and burdock roots—tasks that required more precision. I sliced the onions thin, shredded the burdock, and tore the konjac into bite-sized pieces by hand.
"It never ends! There's so much!"
"You'll get faster with practice. Just don't rush and cut yourself."
"Wait, you're done already?!" she gasped.
Speed was everything in a kitchen. I grabbed a massive frying pan and tossed in the two kilograms of pork.
"Hup! Hah!"
Stir-frying that much meat would normally be exhausting, but for a Cookman, it was easy. I could toss the pan all day. Once the meat was seared, Clementine finished her prep work.
"Perfect timing."
I added all the vegetables to the pan. I sautéed them until the pork fat coated everything, then added a generous amount of grated ginger for flavor.
Forty people... roughly 200ml per serving... I'll need about nine liters to account for evaporation.
I used the Pitcher of Endless Water and my Cookman skills to measure the exact amount. I pulled out a nine-liter cauldron, transferred the stir-fry, and filled it with water. I ignored the gasps from the villagers as they watched the bottomless pitcher pour. Convenience trumped secrecy. I added ten grams of dashi stock and forty milliliters of soy sauce to the base.
"Wow... that smells incredible."
"We're just getting started."
I hadn't even added the miso yet. I skimmed the foam off the surface and waited for the perfect moment to finish the dish.
***
As Kawasaki's cooking progressed, a figure was approaching Carne Village. She wore a modified black maid outfit with high slits, had healthy tanned skin, and vibrant red hair tied into twin braids. She stopped in her tracks and sniffed the air.
"Hm? That smells delicious~su."
Lupusregina Beta, a battle maid of the Pleiades and a werewolf, tilted her head. She shouldn't have been able to smell anything from this distance, but her heightened senses picked it up clearly.
"That's strange~su."
Carne Village shouldn't have had the resources to produce a scent that rich. She hurried toward the village, only to freeze at the sight of an orange, ball-like figure happily stirring a cauldron in the square.
"Lo-Lo-Lo-Lord Kawasaki?! Why?! What are you doing here~su?!"
Recognizing one of the forty-one Supreme Beings, the masters of the Great Tomb of Nazarick, Lupusregina fell into a state of total panic. Realizing she couldn't handle this alone, she immediately activated a Messagespell to the one person who could give her orders.
"Yu-Yu-Yuri! Sister Yuri!"
***
Inside the Great Tomb of Nazarick, a beautiful woman in a black maid outfit walked through the corridors. With her hair in a bun and her professional glasses, Yuri Alpha looked the part of the perfect, capable maid. She was a Dullahan, a headless knight, and the vice-leader of the Pleiades.
I hope Lupu is doing alright...
Lord Ainz had ordered Lupusregina to monitor Carne Village, but her sadistic tendencies always made Yuri worry. Suddenly, she felt the mental ping of a Message.
"Yes, this is Yuri Alpha."
"Yu-Yu-Yuri! Sister! We have a problem~su! A big one!"
Yuri's expression hardened. "Calm down, Lupu. What happened? Is it something you can't handle?"
"He-He-He—!"
"Lupusregina! Pull yourself together! Are you a maid of Nazarick or not?!"
The reprimand seemed to work. Lupusregina took a breath and returned to her usual tone. "Sorry, Sister. I'm okay now."
"Good. Now, what happened? Depending on the situation, I will inform Lord Ainz."
"I found him! I found Lord Kawasaki in Carne Village!"
"What?" Yuri's professional mask slipped, and her voice went flat with shock.
"Lord Kawasaki is in Carne Village! He's... he's cooking with a human! It smells so good, I'm so jealous~su!"
The Supreme Beings had all left Nazarick, except for Lord Ainz. But Chef Kawasaki was different; he had always been there, even for a short time, to share his food with the NPCs. The idea that he was in a nearby village was unbelievable.
At least it was Lupu and not Narberal or Entoma, Yuri thought with relief. The others might have reacted violently to a Supreme Being cooking for humans.
"What should I do? Should I go to him?"
"Wait. Don't be rash," Yuri commanded. "He is currently cooking?"
"Yes~su."
"Lord Kawasaki is a chef; he takes immense pride in his work. If you interrupt him now, you will surely incur his wrath. Meet up with the Eight-Edge Assassins and provide guard duty from a distance. I will seek instructions from Lord Ainz."
"Got it! Please hurry!"
***
In his private study, a skeleton draped in magnificent black robes sat behind a desk. To the world, he was the Overlord, Ainz Ooal Gown. But inside, he was Suzuki Satoru, a former salaryman who was currently exhausted by his new life.
"I have to find Kawasaki..."
He had been looking for his friend since the transition. Kawasaki had promised to spend the final moments of Yggdrasilwith him, but he hadn't been in Nazarick when the world changed.
"Where could he be?"
Ainz knew Kawasaki had been logged in at the same time. There was no reason for him to be missing. He wanted to send the entire army to find him, but he had no leads. Why hadn't he appeared in the tomb? Why didn't Message work? Maybe they were just too far apart?
No... he couldn't have been killed. No way.
The Cookman was the least popular race in the game. They had high HP but were practically useless in combat due to racial penalties. Their skills were all culinary jokes—like "Whirlwind Ladle" or "Cutting Board Boomerang." Their true power lay in support—buffs, debuffs, and healing that rivaled top-tier mages—but they were meant to stay at the base. A Level 100 Cookman only had the combat stats of a Level 50. If he had been surrounded by enemies... Ainz shook the thought away.
"He's fine. He has to be out there somewhere."
He let out a heavy sigh and went back to his paperwork. He needed information from the Sunlight Scripture members held in the Frozen Prison. He also needed to consider becoming an adventurer to gather intel.
Suddenly, a knock sounded at the door.
"It is Yuri Alpha of the Pleiades. I have an urgent report from Lupusregina. May I enter?"
Ainz straightened his posture, shifting from "Suzuki Satoru" back to the "Overlord."
"Enter."
Yuri walked in, her aura crackling with urgency. "Forgive the intrusion, Lord Ainz. I felt this was too urgent to wait for Lady Albedo."
"Very well. Speak."
"Lupusregina reports that she has found Lord Kawasaki in Carne Village."
For a second, Ainz's brain stalled.
"...I'm sorry, could you repeat that?"
"Lord Kawasaki has been found. He is currently in Carne Village, preparing a meal."
Ainz felt a surge of pure, unadulterated joy. His emotional suppression kicked in with a flash of green light, but the happiness was too strong to be fully contained. He stood up so abruptly his chair nearly toppled.
"Is it true?! You are certain?!"
"Yes, my Lord. There is no mistake."
One of his friends was here. The loneliness that had been gnawing at him was replaced by an overwhelming urge to see him. He instinctively cast Gate.
"Lord Ainz! Where are you going?!"
"To Carne Village!"
"But without an escort?! Should we not wait for Lady Albedo?!"
Ainz didn't care. Every second spent waiting was a second he wasn't with his friend. He ordered Yuri to follow him and stepped toward the portal, then stopped.
"Lord Ainz, you will cause a panic in that form."
"Tch! Right."
He quickly donned the "Jealousy Mask" and gauntlets to hide his skeletal frame. Just as he and Yuri were about to step through, the doors burst open.
"Lord Ainz! Where are you going?!"
It was Albedo, her black wings twitching with concern. Terrible timing!
"There is an emergency in Carne Village that only I can resolve!" Ainz shouted. "I will return shortly! You are in command until then!"
"Wait! I shall accompany you—!"
Ainz didn't listen. He vanished into the Gate. Albedo was left standing in the study, clutching her handkerchief so hard it began to tear. "Yuri Alpha... a secret rendezvous with Lord Ainz...?! GRRRR!"
***
Back in the village, the air was filled with the sound of satisfied "Mmm's" and "Delicious!"
I had been worried about whether they'd like miso, but it seemed I had nothing to fear. I figured if they hated it, I'd just throw in some butter to make it taste more "Western," but it wasn't necessary.
"Kawasaki, this is so good! Can I have seconds?!"
"I made this for the villagers, you know..." I chuckled, but I filled Clementine's bowl anyway. She had worked hard, after all.
Suddenly, a swirling black vortex appeared in the center of the square.
"Is that... Gate?!"
I tensed up. As a Cookman, I couldn't win a fight against a high-level magic caster. Clementine dropped her bowl and rushed to my side. But before she could even draw her weapon, a figure stepped through the portal.
He wore magnificent black robes and a strange, brown mask that depicted a crying, envious face.
"Momonga...? Why the Jealousy Mask?"
I couldn't help but laugh. It was such a ridiculous item. The villagers started shouting, "It's Lord Ainz! Lord Ainz has returned!"
Ainz? Is that what he's calling himself now? Then, Yuri Alpha stepped through the portal behind him. That confirmed it.
"Kawasaki! Thank goodness! I've been looking everywhere for you!"
Momonga sprinted toward me. Knowing there was a skeleton under that mask made his puppy-like excitement look a bit odd, but I didn't care.
"Momonga! You're here too!"
I grinned as he reached out. I grabbed his hand and shook it firmly, the relief washing over me like a wave.
Menu 4: Hearty Pork and Vegetable Miso Soup — Part 2