My mind was in a mess. I had no idea how this even happened nor when could I have met yet another unique monster.
I was filled with questions, yet I had not a single answer. There was so much that I wanted, yet I was powerless to fulfill my desires.
Aah... my head throbbed, my chest hurt. I still had trouble breathing too. Experiencing death for the first time wasn't anything you could call pleasant. It was a feeling I could never get used to.
...
'I'm so tired. I don't want to move. Just staying here is more relaxing. And what's the point if I'll die anyway? Also, perhaps "salvation" refers to finding peace in death?'
But still... I don't want to die. What if there is no next time and I don't come back to life after dying?
My eyes became watery, a tear slowly fell down my bloodied cheek. I felt powerless... and lonely. In a hostile environment where everything wanted to kill me and I couldn't do anything to defend myself.
Relying only on myself was way too hard...
'Somebody help me please..!'
'If David was there, he could surely wipe out a dozen unique monsters and save me from this nightmare! Yes, he is that strong!'
...
Regaining hope, I stood up abruptly.
'Also, maybe the black box really did activate and he was on his way here right now? Then patiently waiting for him would be my best option...'
So I looked for a good spot to rest nearby, and not far from where I was, I found a somewhat enclosed and hidden space filled with strange yet beautiful bright violet flowers. A scenery that seemed to be out of place and that appeared out of nowhere.
Making my way over there, I slowly sat on the soft grassy green floor, then leaned against the hard stone wall. I was sure that if I waited enough, David would come to bring me back to the spaceship.
Nevertheless, this place was so calm. A complete opposite to the chaotic hell the Shepherd's scenario was. Maybe that clock wasn't that dangerous actually.
Yeah, it won't be that hard to get out I think.
Though I'm feeling so tired... my eyelids were so heavy, my body couldn't move normally, as if a soft, relaxing weight was pressing down on me.
I slowly exhaled, a long breath that lasted until sleep sent me adrift...
'I'm hopeful—...'
*
...
Light poured into my closed eyes, forcing me to open them. They adapted quickly to the shining sun as I took in my surroundings. The clear blue sky and the dull grey rock.
It seemed like I slept through the night. The fact that I went back in time didn't mean that exhaustion would disappear, I was still mentally drained in addition to my worn-out body.
However, it still surprises me that I just dropped unconscious on the spot... I was lucky no wild beast ate me for dinner too.
I then stood up to stretch my legs and find out more about this new scenario...
But I couldn't. For some reason, I had completely lost control over the lower part of my body. All sensation in my legs had disappeared.
So I looked at my feet...
And I was submerged in anguish, in fear.
There were no more legs. Instead, I saw flesh. My own flesh being eaten raw by horrific violet flowers. No, these couldn't be called flowers anymore, but only mouths surrounded by petals. Mouths slowly gnawing at my flesh.
I saw my bones, my organs... all my insides spilling out from my body as for the monster's buffet.
I didn't feel pain nor any discomfort. I simply spectated the gruesome scene that played before my eyes, as if it had nothing to do with me.
I tried moving, fighting back, but no matter how much strength I used on my arms, I couldn't do anything. I was completely paralyzed, forced to watch myself being gradually consumed. I couldn't scream, I couldn't tremble, I couldn't even lose consciousness nor close my eyes. I was as silent and as inactive as a statue, awaiting my sure coming death.
'Stop! Please...'
I pleaded, screamed inwardly... no words came out.
Some of it ate me from the outside, others penetrated inside me, replacing the eaten parts.
There was no sound, no wind. I only felt my heart beating... gradually slowing down.
Life had abandoned me once again.
*
*
It was night, the cold breeze caressed my bloodied skin.
I came back exactly where I was when I exited the Shepherd's Trial.
I had died again.
I stayed still for a moment.
The image of this atrocious scene, the discomfort that came after dying... there was no way to get used to it.
The anguish and fear never left me. Sweat mixed with blood covered me entirely. The hair on my skin rose as I shivered uncontrollably, I felt a pang in my stomach. I really felt like throwing up...
I was scared shitless. Frightened that I would die again...
...
However, I couldn't give up. If I survive enough time, David will come rescue me, I was sure of it.
Hence, even though I was exhausted, I didn't lose hope and went in a different direction to explore and find out more about the situation.
Thus I had already made up my mind, putting a hand over my chest before slowly exhaling, I calmly strode forward.
I couldn't shake off my fear, but I could still manage to somewhat ignore it.
Then suddenly, the ground shook. It started weakly... and the shaking amplified, little by little... soon, it stopped, as abruptly as it began.
For a few seconds, stillness.
And with a loud breaking sound, giant monsters emerged from the ground. Only a dozen at the beginning, but the number multiplied over time and soon spanned easily over a thousand.
Giant centipedes were surrounding me, and they weren't the same weak ass insects that I had killed back on the ship, that stood now before me, but huge monsters the size of a building.
In a quick flash, one of them passed right next to me. I couldn't even react, I didn't even know what happened before I felt a strong electric pain coming from my left side. My arm was gone and blood poured like a fountain.
I screamed, squeezing my shoulder, wishing for the suffering to stop.
It hurt. So much I couldn't even stand properly and staggered backwards, almost falling. This pain wasn't like anything I had felt before; it felt stronger, amplified.
Another one dashed. An immediate motion that twisted my right leg at a weird angle. Losing my balance, I fell head first straight onto the ground.
It was as if they were playing with me, not killing me and enjoying the agony that they were inflicting on me.
One smaller centipede then slammed itself over me, crushing my whole body with its weight. The sound of bones shattering resounded loudly as I was crying and vomiting blood.
I was powerless, their plaything. A toy used then thrown away after it breaks.
They played with me for what felt like several hours.
And finally, they stopped.
I was now but an unrecognizable mass of flesh with only my head remaining, yet I was still alive.
The tallest of the giant insects slowly approached me, and maw wide open he swallowed me whole.
The last thing I heard was its eerie chittering followed by my skull being crushed; then the world turned black.
*
*
The same spot, the same situation. I felt weak, drained... and hollow.
This time I didn't take a moment to gather my thoughts. I just limply started walking towards an unknown direction.
I had stopped thinking, the flow of time felt distorted, fast-forwarded.
...
I died of thirst.
I returned.
I walked.
I died from a landslide, buried under the ground as I couldn't breathe.
I came back.
I died, burnt to a crisp as lightning struck me.
I died, frozen by a monster I did not know.
I died.
I died…
I died.
...
I returned.
I stopped.
I fell down to my knees, head hung low. Tears streamed from my eyes.
I cried. I cried so hard and loud. Screaming my lungs out, I shouted for help, voice hoarse and broken. I wanted it to stop, I wanted to be free...
I wanted to die.
*
*
*
[A/N]
Thanks for reading…
____ ____ ____