"Relax, relax, relax—I'm getting to the story already!"
Watching the chat barking again, Tuji angrily clicked her mouse and shouted.
[Disloyal to Elric once = disloyal forever!]
[Is playing Genshin really that painful for you?]
[Brothers, the streamer next door already finished this part of the story, let me tell you—]
System:User "Digging Into Elric's Elementary School" has been muted.
[Good. Deserved.]
[Spoiler dogs should die.]
[Unhinged username.]
"Nice work, mods. At least you're not freeloading,"
Tuji praised them casually, then began progressing the story with Lumine.
"Hm? I smell drama."
Tuji narrowed her beautiful eyes and muttered.
She absolutely refused to believe that a handsome guy like Elric could be a villain!
A guy this handsome must have some unspeakable hidden suffering, right? JPG.
As long as the character is good-looking, morality naturally follows the face.
Ahem—of course, that was a joke.
She could accept a character fully turning evil.
For example, she loved Madara.
And Tartaglia's popularity had always been sky-high.
But that depended on execution.
Take Dottore—his behavior in Sumeru and various world quests made him genuinely detestable.
She hated him, disliked him, yet still accepted that kind of characterization.
A game having an irredeemably evil villain was normal.
Just don't whitewash him and disgust the audience.
So if Elric turned out to be a villain, she could accept that too.
It all depended on how the writers handled it.
Hopefully the writers hadn't run out of ideas.
With mixed emotions, Tuji continued the story.
Of course, the chat didn't care about any of that. They just wanted entertainment.
[Hurry hurry hurry, skip all this useless plot!]
[You think this is what we're here for?]
[Kid, don't rush.]
[Who asked you?]
[Lao Da, I miss you so much 😭]
"Why are you rushing like maniacs? We're here to appreciate Genshin's story. Kids these days are way too impatient."
Tuji sighed, putting on an old-lady tone, but continued pushing the story forward anyway.
She still believed the Elric she liked wouldn't be a bad person.
As the story progressed, she followed Elric all the way to his destination — a tavern.
Her sharp eyes noticed the name on the signboard.
Cat Café.
"Wow, simple and straightforward."
Tuji silently complained and clicked the interaction prompt at the door.
Naturally, the scene of Lumine picking the lock with a wire wasn't shown.
The game left it to the player's imagination.
After all, this was a 12+ game. A lot of things couldn't be shown directly, or complaints would flood in.
Seeing the new cutscene, Tuji exhaled and patted her heavy "slimes" proudly.
"Thank god this isn't another stealth mission like stealing the Holy Lyre in Mondstadt."
That mission nearly broke her hands.
Yes, she was a certified skill-issue player.
Stealth?
She'd rather go full Musou and wipe everything.
[Stealth? Musou!]
[If you kill all the enemies, nobody notices you.jpg]
[Wait… you call that stealth?]
[Isn't it?]
As the cutscene started, Elric's helpless voice echoed through the scene.
[Holy crap, are they doing… something spicy?]
[Is this really Genshin? Is this still 12+?]
[No way MiHoYo actually dares to do this…]
[A Sumeru scholar by day, secretly doing…]
[Isn't this just a pet shop? The sign literally says "Cat Café."]
[Huh?]
[Huh? x10086]
[I really love Genshin players' favorite word: "Huh?"]
Tuji noticed all of this too.
Listening to Elric's dialogue, she couldn't help twitching her lips in amusement.
Especially that line:
"You're already in this line of work—why pretend to be innocent?"
If she didn't know this was Genshin, and hadn't seen the Cat Café sign outside,
she'd seriously think she had opened a certain Steam platform instead.
Buddy, you definitely have some shady side business going on.
But the real highlight was the upcoming awkward moment between Lumine and Elric.
That silent embarrassment was so strong she could practically feel Lumine digging out a two-bedroom apartment with her toes.
Thankfully, Paimon was there to lighten the atmosphere.
Otherwise, Lumine might have just played dead on the spot.
And sure enough—
Lumine awkwardly sat beside Elric, her ears completely red.
"Hahahaha, I'm dying laughing, chat!"
Tuji zoomed in on Lumine's face and took a screenshot, saving it to her computer.
This was the first time she'd ever seen shy Lumine in a story cutscene.
Way too cute.
[I'm dead. Won't Lumine just get used to it eventually and take the initiative?]
[Last time it was a lecture, this time a cat café — next time straight to prison?]
[Elric is completely countered by Lumine now.]
[Lumine raging and leading a million troops to raid the cat café!]
[Ahhh, naughty Elric is so cute, I'm getting wet.]
[Sorry, already typed it.]
[Report him!]
[Elric: I almost suffered a cyber lynching.]
Honestly, just listening to the earlier dialogue alone could easily make someone think Elric was the leader of some shady organization.
In fact, certain pink websites had already uploaded meme edits of Elric.
Traffic was skyrocketing.
This time, Elric was truly about to explode in popularity.
No one expected MiHoYo to dare include such misleading lines.
Clearly, player retention pressure had pushed them to the edge.
Players could only say one thing:
More of this, please. We love it.
At the same time, countless artists leapt out of bed and began drawing Elric from every possible angle.
You're finished.
I'm drawing your doujin.
Discovering a new business opportunity, they went completely feral.
Even if nobody bought it —
with this personality alone, they'd still draw one.
Worst case, they'd keep it for personal use… or upload it for free so everyone could enjoy.
Advance Chapters available on Patreon
patreon.com/CrimsonHub