What happened? Where am I?
Dark clouds shrouded the sky as if grieving for the world below. Thunder rumbled incessantly. Flashes of lightning struck from above. Meanwhile, I sat there, stunned, staring at him—the man holding a revolver in his right hand while drawing from a cigarette.
Isn't that me? Are we meeting again?
"Perhaps this is the end. I can't save anyone. Let this world crumble; I don't care." He looked at me. Yet, that gaze was hollow, like a deep, encroaching darkness.
"Hey… what are you doing?" I asked.
He didn't answer immediately. His voice remained locked away even though his lips were slightly parted. One second. Two seconds. Three seconds passed until only the sound of the wind remained between us. Thunder roared again, followed by lightning flickering through the clouds. A drop of water hit my face, and the rain began to pour.
He lowered his weapon, tilting his head back toward the sky to let the rain soak his face, his eyes wandering far off toward something unseen. What had happened to him? The last time I visited him in a dream, he could still smile, and his eyes were still full of life.
"Do you know what is the most painful thing in this world?" he said without lowering his gaze.
I wanted to answer "being hurt," but the world he inhabited was different from mine. I replied that I didn't know. After a few seconds of silence, he spoke:
"It's when no matter what you do, you still lose everything. I lost my father and mother, my home, my siblings, my friends, my best friend, my lover… and now, perhaps I will lose this world. What have I done to deserve this? This power is useless if I cannot protect what I own," he expressed.
"What do you mean? What exactly happened?" I was utterly confused by the situation. I was certain he had fallen into a deep depression.
He took the cigarette from his mouth, extinguished it with his index finger, and tossed it aside carelessly. Truly, even though he was my alternate-world self, this man was a total enigma. I had no idea what he was thinking.
He turned around, walking toward the edge. I looked around and realized I was standing on top of a building. I stood up and approached him as he stared down. Ah… no wonder he felt this way. This world was truly broken. Everything was leveled to the ground, leaving only monsters killing one another to survive.
"This is what happened. A Great War occurring on every continent. Everything has become meaningless. I don't know what's left to defend. It's futile even if I slaughter them all. Humanity cannot endure much longer. This earth will be soaked in blood."
My hands clenched, not out of anger—but frustration. I was speechless. Perhaps his choice to remain silent was right, as there was nothing left to fight for. And yet, he was still struggling to live. For what reason did he endure?
"Then, why are you still alive here?" I asked spontaneously. I clicked my tongue inwardly; the question escaped me before I could stop it.
"I don't know either. It's as if something is holding me back from dying sooner." This time, he answered instantly, without the previous hesitation.
It seemed there was still hope for him. "Keep it that way. Don't give up too soon, even if your world is a mess, because you deserve to live in peace."
The wind blew harder. The clouds suddenly moved erratically as if something was about to descend from the sky. I had a bad feeling. And that's when I heard it—a deep growl that shook the very air. Just after I said those words, a monster as tall as the building appeared before us. It glared at the version of me living in this world, let out a deafening roar, and launched an attack. However, the strike was stopped by him using his abilities.
My consciousness began to fade, signaling my return to my own body. And for a brief moment, I saw him smile.
This is a conversation that is still far in the future. It is a fragment of my life story, filled with pursuits, brawls, battles, and killings. Nothing in this world should be underestimated—be it big or small, rich or poor. It all depends on whether one is capable or not. If you are capable, then you can face every storm that strikes. If you are not, then you must strive. There are no excuses. Even an ant can defeat an elephant because it tries. The strength or weakness of a living being is relative. In this world, power is not the ultimate thing. What matters is the ability to stay alive. That is one of the ways to survive.