I don't remember what calm feels like
Breathing deep and full
I don't remember what happy feels like
Just sad, dark and dull
I don't remember what safe feels like
Not looking over my shoulder
I don't know what peace looks like
Afraid of getting older
I don't know what strength looks like
Always crippled by my fears
I don't know what better looks like
It's been like this for years
I don't know what myself is like
As I sit and wipe my tears
I don't know what tomorrow is like
Maybe my mind will be clear
-SJ-