Chapter 1 - meri zindagi ki sachai

Meri jindagi mein aisi aisi sacchai Maine Dekhi Hai aur jis situation se main gujari hun vaisi jindagi Kisi ki Na Ho yah main chahti hun Bachpan Se lekar Abhi Tak bahut sari taklife, emotion apnon ki sacchai yah Meri jindagi ka ek hissa Ban chuke hain chahe lakh koshish Karna per yah sacchai Hai Meri jindagi ke. Bachpan mein jid Kiya karti thi Maa ke Aanchal Se bandhi rahti thi per mujhe nahin pata tha ki vah Aanchal bahut jald mere hathon se chhut jaega. Bachpan mein Main Akeli rah jaaungi iski mujhe bhanak bhi nahin thi mujhe Kya pata tha ki Bhagwan Achanak Se mujhe Meri Maa Se dur Kar dega aur vah hamesha ke liye mujhe chhodkar is duniya Se Chali gai mujhe to samajh hi nahin a raha tha ki mere Sath Kya Ho Raha Hai mera Bachpan wahin kahin Kho Gaya mujhe laga Main kaise apne aap ko Sambhal paungi FIR Jaise taise Meri jindagi chal rahi thi apni bahano ke sath Apne pita ke Sath har baat per zid Karti to dant padati samajh hi nahin aaya ki Kaun Meri Jid samjhega bs aise hi jindagi chalti Rahi FIR Achanak se itni chhoti Si umra mein jimmedari mahsus hone lagi padhaai ke sath sath jimmedari bhi a gai Apne pita ke bimar hone ke bad yah mahsus hua kaise apni jimmedari utha paungi FIR dheere dheere apni jimmedari nibhaane ki koshish karne lagi uske bad mere pita bhi humse dur Chale gaye Aisa Laga Mano jindagi sab kuchh chhin rahi hai bs akelapan mahsus hone Laga yah Kaisa akelapan tha Jo Meri jindagi ka ek hissa ban gaya Jo kabhi khatm hi nahin ho raha tha dheere dheere sab kuchh khatm Aisa mahsus ho raha tha aisa lag raha tha kya karun kiske bharose rahun Kaun mujhe sambhalega Tut se Gai thi Meri bahano ki shaadi Ho Gai Thi main bilkul Akeli pad Gai thi mujhe laga yah akelapan Main kaise ji sakungi per jindagi Ne mujhe yah bhi jina sikha Diya aage chalkar main is akelepan ko kaise apnaungi iski mujhe Koi samajh hi nahin thi fir bhi Main jindagi mein aage badh rahi thi fir bhi Main jindagi mein aage badh rahi thi dost the baten thi sab kuchh hote hue bhi akelapan sath tha tab jindagi ka asali mahatva mujhe samajh aane Laga Kya Karun kiske liye jiyun kuchh samajh na aate hue bhi bs aage badhati Rahi Koi pyar se baat karta to main yah sochati ki vah mere liye bahut loyal hai bahut important hai mere akelepan ko dur Karega per Main ek galatfahmi ka shikar Banti ja rahi thi mere Sath log jud to rahe the Lekin sirf matlab ke liye kuchh kuchh acche dost mile jinhone mujhe bahut Sahara Diya kuchh bikhar bhi Hai aur kya kahun yah to hona Hi tha. Koi hamesha kisi ke sath thodi hi rah sakta hai FIR kuchh salon ke bad meri bhi shaadi Hui mujhe laga ab Mera akelapan dur hoga lekin mujhe kya pata tha ki main depression ka shikar ban rahi hun Meri Life mein mere pati Ne mujhe samajhne ki bajay mujhe depression ka shikar banaa liya main kuchh salon ke bad depression mein bimar ho gai Koi samajhne wala nahin tha mujhe laga kahin Meri Hi galti Ho Gai depression ke halat mein Apne bacche ko bhi pahchanna mere liye bahut mushkil ho gaya tha lekin Bhagwan Ne Mera bahut Sath Diya Main dheere dheere depression se bahar aane lagi jab depression se bahar aane lagi tab mujhe laga main apne bacche ke liye fir se jeene lagi hun Pati ne bhi Sath chhod Diya mujhe laga Shayad vah Mera Sath denge Lekin yah sirf meri soch thi jis Insan ke sath Maine apni jindagi shuru ki thi fir se vahi Insan mujhe kabhi samajh hi nahin Paya bs fir se akelepan ki jindagi mein chal rahe thi