It's been an entire month since I watched Airi fight against that other Zierel that showed up here.
It honestly hasn't been the most eventful here for the last month. Airi has been kind of quiet about everything lately, not that I really understand.
Being a light bearer is probably quite stressful with all the responsibilities they probably have. I just wish I could do something helpful for her.
But it isn't always that easy.
The feeling in my arm kind of disappeared since the day we cleaned the blood. There's really no explanation with how it works at all.
"It would probably be smart to start teaching you about how to awaken. I know how much it bothers you to sit around without a way to fight back," Airi speaks up as she takes a seat next to me.
"The infection is the only thing that helped me kill a zierel so far," I reply with a calm tone.
"That's why it is good that I got assigned to you. The others aren't as kind as me, but that doesn't really matter," Airi says while looking forward.
The church is looking a lot nicer since we cleaned everything up over the last month. It looks like a place that is worth checking out, at least compared to the buildings around us.
We even hung a few of the paintings back up on the walls again.
Each one with a different idea; something that really makes you think about what it could mean.
Poke. Poke.
I shift my attention back towards Airi as I realize she is trying to get my attention.
"I am glad you are kind. I'd rather have someone who can show me the ways to grow," I reply with a genuine tone.
"Then let's focus on growing together," Airi says with a cheerful tone.
We move on after that; getting through the day without any issues. I mostly spent my time helping Airi set-up a nice spot for us to make food.
It was a makeshift kitchen area for us to use until we find a place that already has a kitchen.
But it felt normal in a way... normal to have someone to get through this with.
My family still continues to haunt my dreams every night... I guess it would be considered nightmares instead. It isn't anything pleasant, ever.
Time has passed and yet I can't seem to stop having these nightmares... no matter how hard I try to avoid them.
Grip.
I instinctively clench my fist as I look down at my arm.
"This damn arm is the reason I couldn't do more..." I say quietly while staring at it.
Would it have made a difference if I never got injured from the monster in the first place? I don't know if I would have been saved by Alice... or if my family would've survived.
Probably not.
There was multiple zierel in the house so it didn't really matter if I had my arm in working condition or not. They still attacked us with the best possible opportunity.
My thoughts disappear as I hear the sound of footsteps entering the room.
"It is easy to tell when you are in your head you know," Airi says softly.
"There's just a lot to think about," I reply while looking down towards the floor.
"Guilt can tear apart a person, don't let it do that to you," Airi says with worry.
"I won't," I reply confidently.
Even with all this guilt... I'll make sure to get my revenge on the zierel, even if it takes me years to do it. They will all die for what they did to the people of my world.
No one deserves to be ripped apart in front of their families or out in the streets by themselves. Everyone deserves to live a long life.
If they aren't scumbags...
"Good. I'll begin to teach you about the light that dwells within humans tomorrow," Airi says with some excitement.
"Light that dwells within us?" I question.
"Yes. I'll cover that tomorrow, no spoilers until then." Airi responds with a smile.
"Then I'll look forward to what awaits me for tomorrow," I say calmly.
She heads back out the door, giving me one last look before closing it behind her.
Learning about this light could be the exact thing I'm looking for to awaken this power within me. I'll definitely take in everything that she tells me tomorrow.
I don't want to be held back forever.
Fighting with the infection alone is never going to be a good solution... No matter how I look at it.
"Blah blah blah. This is a blessing that you should be grateful for," the voice speaks up with a bit of irritation.
"Uh huh," I say softly.
"Seriously it is a blessing! Anyone would be lucky to have this!!" It shouts with frustration.
The voice became a bit more clear; a woman's voice came out with the frustration.
I've never had to deal with a problem like this before, but maybe it isn't the worst thing. I'm surprised I haven't gotten any help from any other guys yet.
Not that I mind a woman helping me get through the harsh world we live in.
Just feels like my luck is different from what it used to be. I never really had to worry about it since I wasn't the most popular with the girls at my school.
"Yappity yap yap. Your thoughts are frustrating sometimes," her voice echoes.
I didn't ask for you to listen to every single thought I have either... You aren't forced to listen to them, or maybe you are?
Honestly I don't feel like arguing with this weird voice so I lay back on my bed and close my eyes. The room around me begins to go dark as I finally begin to drift off once again.
The days always feel so long so this is the best part of it all.
Creak!