Balak gazed up at the false sky after dealing with Herim.
Right now—he was!
"This is the life of a great warrior!!!"
So this is why you raise newbies!
So this is why high school teachers cry when their students graduate!
Ahh... this is pure emotion.
The true mindset of a teacher...
Kuhuhu~ Speaking of which, that newbie.
Honestly, I was shocked.
Who would've thought he'd land a hit on me!
But his damage wasn't enough to pierce my bizarre aura.
Still, that'll sort itself out once he levels up, so no worries there.
And most importantly, he understood romance!
To forge a greatsword bigger than himself!!
A true hero!
That newbie was the real hero!
"Hueeuk... After nothing but super cowards and total losers, to see such a fresh-faced newbie..."
That's why I told him not to waste time headbutting the wall like the others at the end.
Go explore somewhere else, grind some levels, and come back.
That newbie Herim will surely power-level and return here!
So I'll be waiting for your rematch, newbie!
But there's one thing that worries me...
That newbie had the talent to become a top ranker in this game, but he couldn't handle my off-beat attacks at all.
Should I change the 'final trial' then?
This final trial was born from pondering what makes a boss fun and worth challenging over and over.
Reflecting on the best bosses I'd faced, I spotted a few common traits.
Bosses with clear attack tells!
Bosses that chain attacks but not endlessly, ones you can dodge or parry every single time—straightforward ones!
WWE-style bosses that give you breathing room!
And plenty more, but that's the gist.
Fun bosses you want to keep fighting? They're basically rhythm games in disguise!
What's a rhythm game?
A game where you hit falling notes right on the judgment line to upbeat music.
Or games where you dance, step, or mash buttons in rhythm.
The difference with a well-made boss fight? Just one!
No notes falling from above.
You watch the boss's moves and dodge or block on the precise timing and rhythm!
Using that, I designed the final trial in three phases: first, simple on-beat attacks.
Then mix in some off-beats.
Finally, pull out the spear I've stashed underground.
But maybe I should drop the off-beats?
Anyway, passing this final trial lets them experience my Phase 1, so only the worthy can truly fight me!
For those worthy players, time to tweak the patterns and train.
Kuuuuwook!
Ziiiiiing...
I pressed a certain switch, and the boss room reverted to a plain cave.
And!!
"Ahh... Always so grand and beautiful."
My training equipment—a massive iron pillar—began rising from the dungeon floor.
***************
Quite some time had passed since I started training, but aside from that fresh-faced newbie Herim, everyone else was getting stuck in the third room.
"Uwaaaah!!!"
"Crazy!! Crazy!! Crazy!!"
"What the hell is thiiiis!!!"
Tsk tsk tsk...
No guts to dodge thousands of magic bullets, just flailing everywhere.
That's why the ratio of deadly shots spikes and they wipe—yet they still haven't figured it out. What a shame.
But there was one weird guy.
"Hat! Hat! Hat!"
Some lunatic training over there?
Honestly, that room's perfect for building agility—reflexes and courage.
So I won't fault him for camping there instead of coming to me, you mad player!
Alright, back to training... Hm?
That...
Lately, fewer players entering—off grinding levels, maybe.
But now, new faces in the first room.
"Whoa, kids?!"
This game's rated 15+?!
And not just kids—people of all ages, different skin colors!!
Th-that means!
"Damn!! Game! How much of a god-game are you!!!"
All those different skin tones mean...
This world's a global hit!
And with perfect auto-translation from the god-like AI, no doubt!
A true god-game!
But something's off.
Too many numbers?
I can't tell the exact time, but it's been a while since I entered this dungeon.
Plenty of time for word to spread worldwide about the shitty map and boss.
Yet they're coming anyway?
Why...
Flash!!
R-right!! Only one possibility!
● Title: Looks like Balak got patched this time.
● Author: WhoMadeThisFuckingGame (123.123)
● Not just the map—Balak boss fight got remade too.
└ That retard boss spamming 138 attacks in a row got fixed?
└ Author) Fucking 187 for me.
└ Can't-clear-dungeon trash spouting nonsense ㄴ
└ Author) Ping-free, search streamer Herim's boss fight.
└ Kick out the forum bugs! Mod!!
● Title: Mad movie you could play at streamer Herim's funeral.
● Author: PleaseDespiseMeEmpressNimi (124.124)
● (Video)
└ O.
└ O.
└ O.
└ O.
└ O.
That's it! Had to be!
"Newbie!! You were an internet broadcaster!!!"
****************
Internet broadcaster—streamer for short—what are they?
Streamers, BJs, PDs—folks making bank off personal streams and content online.
And this game? A global god-game swarming with players!!
Of course streamers worldwide flocked here to cash in!
What about their viewers?
Some want god-tier gameplay, sure.
But that alone gets stale quick, right?
Humans—past, present, future—all crave the same thrill.
People suffering!!
That's right! These streamers are deliberately diving into this crap dungeon for content!!
"Damn it! My dungeon turned into a money-printing ATM!!!"
Everyone laughing and thriving is great by utilitarian standards.
But I want true warriors here—not these money-grubs!!
And now I get why kids are showing up.
Curiosity from watching their fave streamer suffer.
Or hyped from our boss fight under the purple sky with white petals falling—me vs. Herim!
Made the boss fight too good, and this happens!!
Stop wasting time here—go grind elsewhere or study IRL!!
But...
This proves my thinking was spot on, so that's good.
"Heh... Players do know romance."
Thanks to them, I have a clear direction for what kind of boss to be.
Alright... Time to refine my now-famous dungeon. How?
To become a legendary great warrior, make it tough but tempting.
But these newbies!!!
Way, way worse than the vanguard who challenged me before.
Ugh... So many super cowards freaking out at a few arrows!
My eyes are rotting!!!
Is this the hell where disgraced warriors go?!
And those guys!! Trying to freeload with the same old tricks?!
**************
Before Balak raged in the boss room.
In the nearby city of Laiter, adventurers flooded in after hearing hero parties had bailed.
The guild was expanding like mad.
Adventurers prepping for the ultra-massive Abyssal Pit—where heroes failed—started freeloading on intel from their deaths.
"So... Floor 1's a narrow path packed with traps?
" Traps? Just brute-force with numbers, right?"
"Yeah?"
Humans think alike.
Remaining heroes in town tried warning them off that method.
But adventurers ignored—maybe it won't happen again, fastest clear, whatever.
Even world-savers hate losing cash!
Thus, adventurers repeated the heroes' mistakes!!
Hundreds banded together and charged the entrance.
Heroes and allies nearby were horrified, some covering mouths and turning away.
Adventurers didn't get it, but inside, the heroes flipped out more.
"You nuts?!"
"No, heroes—what—"
"Aaah!!! They didn't tell you outside?!"
"Heard the gist. But odds of it happening again are low—"
"You heard and still pull this shit?! Damn! I'm out!"
"Me too!"
Some heroes yelled at adventurers then dove off the cliff.
"This is 'humanity' for you."
"Yeah, so we gotta try harder..."
"I'll go first..."
"...I'll follow."
Others vanished into darkness, enlightened.
Finally...
"O...! Stay back!!"
"Um..."
"Don't come near meeeee!!!"
One hero saw the adventurers, collapsed, and screamed.
And with that scream...
Boom!
"Aah!! It's coming!! That thing's coming!!"
"Wh-what?"
"Battle stations, everyone!!!"
Rules exist for a reason—especially "don't."
Safety rules carved in blood, ignore at your peril.
"Shoulder Tackleeeee!!!"
""""Huh...?""""
Kwaaaaaang!!!!
The Hall of Madness turned into a frenzied nightclub once more.