After all that happened, there was a brief reprieve of control in my life.
I was stronger. I had friends.
I did what I wanted and said what I wanted, but don't get it confused — I wasn't a bully. If anything, I protected the bullied.
The wimps.
The nerds.
The geeks and loners.
Those were my people, and I made sure they were safe.
As for Brandon, I barely saw him anymore, and honestly, it was for the best. The quiet girl who loved him — the one who would've done anything to appease him or earn a smile — she was gone.
Only the hardened, aggressive, flirtatious one remained.
Just me and my girls… being teens.
Trying alcohol.
Smoking the devil's lettuce.
Skipping school.
Sometimes slipping small things into our pockets at department stores.
Nothing worth calling the cops over.
Oh, please don't look at me like that — it was never anything anyone would miss.
The point is, we weren't evil. A little fractured, sure, but not broken. And never alone.
Those girls became my world. They brought color to an otherwise dull existence. I didn't feel like the weird kid anymore. I didn't feel like the problem.
I felt… included.
One afternoon we were sprawled out in Gabby's room. She was obsessed with pink and those teen magazines — you know the ones with Zac Efron and Corbin Bleu plastered everywhere. Her walls were covered in them.
I was sitting on the glittery shag carpet between her knees while she braided my hair into two French plaits.
"Hold still," she muttered, turning my head slightly as she worked on the other side.
I remember that conversation vividly.
Because that was the day.
The day I met my next obsession.
Raven was stretched out on the bed playing her DS when Mercedes perked up from her spot by the dresser.
"Oh — there's a party at the skating rink tonight," she said, swinging her feet as she watched us. "Y'all in? This guy I've been linking with is throwing it."
Gabby snorted and rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah? So is this invite just for you, or—"
Mercedes laughed, hopping off the counter. "Please. You know I'm not going anywhere without my girls. All of y'all can come kick it."
Then she looked at me.
"Rhea, you coming?"
I hesitated. Not because I didn't want to go — but because part of me didn't believe it. I'd never really been invited to a party before. Not like that. Not without some kind of twisted strings attached—as I've made clear through this tale.
"You sure?" I asked, looking at her. "Like… actually sure?"
She rolled her eyes. "Girl, yes. Just wear something cute."
I nodded, letting the invitation sink in.
"Okay," I said. "Cute. I got you."
….
I snuck out of my house around nine and made my way to Gabby's.
And when I say snuck out—that's not really accurate. It wasn't sneaking. My mom didn't care anymore. I mean, let's be real, she never really did, but by then she didn't even pretend.
I snuck out of my house around nine and made my way to Gabby's.
And when I say snuck out—that's not really accurate. It wasn't sneaking. My mom didn't care anymore. I mean, let's be real, she never really did, but by then she didn't even pretend.
I walked right past her and out the door.
She didn't spare me a glance.
And I damn sure didn't give her one.
I hopped on my bike and headed down the street. Gabby lived in the same neighborhood as me, so it wasn't far. Two blocks out, a right turn into the cul-de-sac, and there was her house—smack dab in the middle.
Her place was a nice two-story, beige exterior, with one of those front indoor patios that led to the door.
Unlike me, Gabby actually had to sneak out.
Her parents weren't as lenient and understanding as mine. Note the sarcasm.
I knocked lightly on her window. The blinds shifted, and I gave a nonchalant wave. She returned it.
She kept her make up light. She was a fan of that gloss and liner look. Plus her skin was good so she could pull it off. She had just enough to make her feel grown. A cute romper that that flattered her soft… figure.
She wore a romper that flattered her soft figure.
Back then, if you weren't a slim like me, you were "fat." But that's not how I saw her. She was fluffy. Curvy. Definitely not fat.
She slid the window open slowly and climbed out, careful not to make a sound.
"Oh my God, Rhea," she whispered, with a wide grin. "You look so cute."
I was still bad at taking compliments back then. Still am, honestly. All I could do was smile and try to fight it, tell her to shut up.
But all She did was double down.
"No, Rhea. Like—really. You look cute. The hoops, the dress… where'd you get that dress?"
It was a white, off-the-shoulder studded dress that hugged my body, giving off the appearance of curves. I shrugged casually.
"Oh, I don't remember. Just looked through my closet and saw it—had it awhile though."
That was a lie.
I had lifted it from Forever 21 just a few hours prior.
I didn't have cute shit. I had the basic necessities, but if I wanted cute. Sexy. Stylish.
Rhea had to make moves of her own. Which I often did.
But she didn't need to know that.
From there, we made our way to Mercedes' house. Same deal. Same neighborhood. Same distance. Raven was the only one who didn't live nearby.
Mercedes fawned over us the second she saw us. Our outfits, our hair, the way we looked. Just girls being girls. We sat on the curb, talking shit, laughing, and waiting for her 'link.'
A black SUV pulled up.
The windows were tinted. The paint was sleek, like it had just rolled off the lot that morning. The driver-side window rolled down just enough for a hand to slip out, fingers curling in a beckoning wave.
Mercedes' eyebrows shot up. She stuck out her tongue at us paired it with her cheeky smile.
"That's him y'all."
She did this little jig when she got excited, making sure her hips swayed, and ass bounced. her heels clanking against the sidewalk as she danced toward the car.
It was obvious this was a last-minute thing. He didn't know we were coming. She leaned in, talked fast, pointed back at us. I watched her face Curiously.
I just knew he wouldn't let us go with them, but I was wrong.
It wasn't until she guided his hand to her cheek before pulling it down to her chest, looking at him with the 'fuck me' eyes she'd been bragging about a few weeks earlier that I knew.
Yup, she got us in. He was putty.
She looked back and gave us a thumbs up. I was in awe at her skill at manipulating guys, but also irritated at the need to do it. That was Mercedes — always telling people things at the very last second and just hoping it worked out.
She waved us over, opened the back door, and Gabby and I slid in while she climbed into the front. She grabbed the man's muscular arm immediately, purring a greeting as she kissed his cheek. "Hey, papi" she said with a giggle before looking back at us.
"This is Daryl," she said, smiling back at us.
He glanced at us in the rearview mirror and nodded.
"Yo. What's up."
I don't know what I expected when Mercedes Said Her link Would be picking us up if he had a car he definitely wasn't our age but still looking at the man with the low cut and experienced eyes. It just was shocking.
He was definitely. Twenty. Twenty-one, maybe more. With Confidence just radiating off of him as well as his cologne.
Mercedes clung to his arm, leaning into his ear to whisper naughty things. This isn't an assumption. This was Mercedes that was her thing. She ran her fingers under his sleeve, until the imprint of her hand made it to the fabric of his chest.
I looked away—out the window.
I'd been flirty before — sure. Flirting was how I took my power back. How I felt wanted on my own terms. And I usually did it with the geeks and nerds I protected.
But this?
This was different.
I'd never gone that far. Never been that openly affectionate.
Openly… sexual.
Anything regarding that was never really voluntary.
I'd glanced over at gabby, but she didn't seem bothered. She kept chatting, nudging me. But her words faded in and out. I saw her glossy pink lips moving, but I didn't hear a damn thing she said.
The thing that jarred me out of the dark silence was him—his voice.
"Hey you good?"
When Daryl spoke to me, my throat closed up.
I stuttered.
Like I was Rhea Liverpool again — first day of school, standing in front of the class again, my heart pounding in my ears.
My lips just opened and closed like a fish out of water
He looked over at Mercedes and whispered. "Aye you told me your girls were good?"
Mercedes hushed him, waving her hand dismissively. "Yeah, my girls good. You so paranoid Daryl damn. Trust me they ain't worried about you."
"Yeah … what's good?" I finally managed.
He watched me a moment, narrowing his eyes before he nodded and pulled off, focused on the road.
My heart was racing.
You don't understand.
I mean—you do understand, because I've told you. But you don't feel it.
Every experience I'd had with an older man ended badly. Every single one. So even though he seemed normal, seemed cool, I couldn't relax.
I was waiting.
Waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Waiting for something to go wrong.
But it didn't.
He focused entirely on Mercedes. Actually listened to her. Laughed when she talked. Responded. Included her. Included us as he drove.
By the time the skating rink lights came into view, I felt just a tiny bit better.
As we hopped out of the SUV and stepped inside, the flashing lights and loud music lit my nervous system on fire.
That's the only way I can describe it.
I felt excited in a way I never had before. I couldn't even attempt to hide the goofy smile that pulled at my lips.
even if I wanted to.
The air was cool.
The people were hot.
The music was loud.
And when a few heads turned, I felt… sexy.
Daryl guided Mercedes like a queen with her king. Me and Gabby had linked arms and walked in behind them, hips swaying to the beat. Even if I didn't feel as confident as I looked, nobody would've known it. My girls gave me strength. Their confidence wrapped around me like armor.
In that moment, I felt like the baddest chick alive.
I glanced over at Mercedes and Daryl and felt the smile falter just a bit.
Because it hit me.
If I wanted to roll with my girls, I had to be like my girls.
I already talked the talk. I did what they did. I said what they said. I even changed how I said it—switched up my cadence, tucked away the country girl and pulled out the Urbana.
But there were still leaps I hadn't taken yet.
And I knew it.
There were lines they'd already crossed that I was still standing on the edge of, pretending I wasn't scared to jump.
Tonight would be the night I proved I belonged.