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Chapter 43 - Ch 43: Watermelon Diplomacy Fails

Garfield had never been fond of Grindelwald's underlings. A pulse of magic threw the man through the door, and the alarm began to blare through the cell block.

Seraphina arrived moments later, stiff with authority.

"…He is one of Grindelwald's men?" she asked, struggling to understand how this could happen.

Garfield stretched. "Mm. That's right."

Seraphina ordered the Aurors to drag the henchman away for questioning. It didn't take long before the man cracked.

Seraphina issued Garfield a verbal commendation for helping uncover an infiltrator.

Garfield ignored it, a plate of peanuts and edamame would have been far more meaningful.

Meanwhile Grindelwald had been gagged again with a magical restraint. He didn't seem troubled, after all, he had already broken through the spell once.

Time and opportunity were all he needed. But his eyes never left Garfield. The orange cat was clever. Knowledgeable, sharp-tongued, and, most annoyingly, sent by Dumbledore.

Grindelwald wanted to win him over.

Garfield couldn't have been less interested.

So Grindelwald's silver-tongued speeches earned nothing but Garfield's pointed glares, dramatic eye-rolls, and the occasional tightening spell.

Over time, Grindelwald grew increasingly frustrated, Garfield broke every one of his expectations just by existing.

And, to Grindelwald's unknown humiliation, Garfield had been livestreaming the conversation.

When the final day of Garfield's contract arrived, he set up the live feed from Grindelwald's cell as usual.

The barrage of comments appeared instantly

"Back again Garfield!"

"Cat slave reporting in!"

"Deploy the Grindelwald Conservation Society!"

"Dumbledore: Don't mind me, I'm just watching."

"Round 45 of Grindelwald vs. The Orange Cat!"

"Local Tyrant Association requesting donation link… let us flex, anchor please!"

"The most wronged Dark Lord in history!"

"Next door is eating bamboo rats again???"

The feed was as lively as ever. Garfield sometimes forgot he used to be one of them back in the day dropping comments, listening to the Old men and Big Bro arguing like a cross-talk duo.

Outside Grindelwald's cell, four Aurors stood guard. They didn't stand long. Garfield snapped his paw and, one by one, they were neatly immobilized and levitated outside.

The more accomplices Garfield caught, the better his meals became. A practical system.

"Orange Cat…" Grindelwald began, voice gravelly.

Garfield didn't look up. Not worth the effort.

Seraphina had been growing paler by the day, as the Ministry rot Grindelwald left behind kept surfacing. Garfield wondered how many loyalists were still buried inside her organization and how it had taken only days for the cracks to widen into chasms.

Why?

Seraphina tried every method in the book… memory-pulling charms, truth-inducing infusions, even a few experimental concoctions she'd brewed herself.

She wrung every embarrassing childhood story out of Grindelwald's henchmen, but none of it worked on Grindelwald himself.

No matter how much potion she forced down his throat, Grindelwald remained infuriatingly silent.

Garfield, lounging nearby, licked a paw and thought it over.

Either his will is absurdly strong… or he's naturally resistant to these primitive potions. Or maybe his magic power's already at the level where truth serums are just a suggestion.

Then it struck him.

Right… this era doesn't even have Veritaserum yet. Don't tell me they end up inventing it because of Grindelwald? Wouldn't be the first time a war needed to create new medicine.

"Listen to me, Orange Cat." Grindelwald drew a deep breath. "This time, I want to have a real conversation with you."

Garfield raised a paw, revealing a freshly cut watermelon half.

Crunch. Crunch. Crunch.

In three massive bites he'd demolished half of it.

He glanced up lazily. "Want some? Pretty good batch today."

"No… thanks." Grindelwald's jaw ticked. "I don't want watermelon. Please just listen to me for once."

"Mm. Go on. Crunch crunch."

Garfield dunked his whole face into the melon again. Without a spoon, there was no other dignified method. He missed the old days of proper utensils and clean cuts.

Ptoo! Ptoo! Ptoo!

A shower of seeds flew out. Garfield washed his face in the cup of water beside him, then eyed the tub of ice cream like a predator locking onto prey.

The one redeeming quality of this era was the food… no additives, no artificial nonsense. The ice cream was pure milk. Cats loved milk, and Garfield despite not technically being a cat, still relished it.

Slurp. Slurp.

Grindelwald rolled his eyes skyward. He'd spent more than two months preaching, persuading, coaxing… long enough that the Aurors listening at the door had nearly joined his cause.

Yet the orange cat? Nothing.

It was maddening.

"Orange Cat," Grindelwald said solemnly, "I swear this is the last time I'll explain this."

The livestream exploded.

"Whoa, he triggered the FG flag!"

"Grindelwald TAKE THAT BACK!"

"Brothers, when I finish my chicken I'm logging in!"

"Million-dollar anchor here, admitting it proudly!"

"Orange Cat online with millions, talk to us about REAL data!"

"Shh, quiet! Grindelwald is about to start his stand-up show!"

"My watermelon is ready."

"I'm a trainee who studied for two years… don't hit me."

Grindelwald pressed on, voice heavy. "Orange Cat… You enjoy luxury here. But outside, there are still many suffering because of wizards. They~"

Garfield choked on his ice cream. "Oh hell, what did they put in this? It's too good! Ugh. Anyway… Grindelwald, drop the act."

"I told you already, the separation between wizards and ordinary people is necessary. It's basic world-logic. You wouldn't get it."

"And by the way, today's my last day supervising you. My contract ends tomorrow."

"I will find you when you leave," Grindelwald said, deadly serious. "I am a man of my word."

Garfield flicked his tail. "Find me? For what… another beating? Try me. I'll educate you again."

He smacked Grindelwald's head lightly with his paw.

( ̄e( ̄)☆╰╮( ̄▽ ̄)

Grindelwald remembered all too vividly the one time he'd spoken too harshly and Garfield had dragged him into a private dimension.

No physical marks had appeared afterward, but his soul had nearly collapsed from the pain. Only his immense magic reserves kept him alive, and he'd been weak for days.

That was the moment Grindelwald realized.

Winning over Garfield wasn't only strategic… it was a necessary condition.

"Ahem. Let's… discuss things civilly," he said, clearing his throat. "After all, this is the wizarding world."

Garfield was already dozing off.

(~﹃~)~zz

꧁𓊈𒆜༺⚜༻𒆜𓊉꧂

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