Yichen was grimacing as Eula carefully helped him sit down on the cold stone bench.
The night wind brushed past, carrying a faint chill.
He closed his eyes and adjusted his breathing, trying to ignore the stabbing pain ripping through his ribs.
However—
After only a few breaths—
The pain retreated.
Not gradually.
It vanished, like a tide pulling back at impossible speed.
Yichen opened his eyes in shock and cautiously moved his body.
Aside from some dust on his clothes and dried blood at the corner of his mouth…
He could move perfectly fine.
"…What?"
Eula froze.
She had heard bones crack.
She had seen him spit blood.
How was he suddenly fine?!
Did she… not hit that hard?
No—impossible.
She knew that feeling.
Yichen frowned.
He took a deep breath. No stabbing pain—but something felt… off.
Like something inside wasn't aligned.
He hesitantly reached under his clothes and felt along his left ribs.
Bone structure. Clear shape—
"…Wait."
The curve felt wrong.
Very wrong.
Yichen's expression turned deeply disturbed.
After checking several times, he reached a horrifying conclusion:
The bone healed.
It reattached.
But it healed crooked.
Probably because the healing factor focused on sticking it together instead of putting it back correctly.
It felt like a newly installed doorframe that's slightly slanted—usable, but unbearable.
He looked up at Eula, who was still stunned under the moonlight, lips slightly parted.
Yichen inhaled, raised his right hand, and clenched it.
"Eula…"
"Please elbow me again."
Silence.
Absolute silence.
Eula's face shifted from confusion to pure disbelief.
"…What did you just say?!"
She instinctively stepped back half a pace.
"Yichen! Did I hit your brain loose?! You want me to—hit you again?!"
"Listen to me!"
Yichen hurriedly explained.
"That hit worked really well! But when I landed, the bone probably reset wrong! It's just slightly off—"
He pointed at his ribs.
"It feels awful! Like a pebble stuck in a boot!"
"So I need you! With your precise, textbook-perfect elbow technique!"
His eyes shone with absolute trust (???).
"Same angle. Same force. One clean hit! I'll lie still this time—this is precision medical trauma!"
Eula: "..."
She stared at his sincere, please hit me face.
At his absolutely unhinged logic.
Something inside her snapped.
Fine.
If you're asking to die, I'll help.
"Wait—Eula—ah—!!!"
Before Yichen could finish—
She moved.
A blur of icy blue.
The second elbow strike landed with even more terrifying force, smashing into the exact same spot.
BANG—CRACK—!!!
Yichen was launched clean off the bench, rolling across the stone pavement before collapsing in a heap.
He couldn't even scream—only gasp like a fish out of water.
Eula stood there, chest rising slightly, staring down to confirm he was still alive.
After a few seconds, she snorted and shook out her elbow.
"Hmph. This grudge—I'm recording ten volumes of it."
The pain faded again.
Yichen shakily sat up and immediately lifted his shirt.
Moonlight revealed—
A larger, more twisted, more artistically offensive bulge under his ribs.
Worse than before.
Much worse.
Yichen poked it.
"…Great. So I still have to assemble it myself. Trash-tier healing factor."
He tried pressing and adjusting it himself, wincing.
Eula folded her arms, prepared to coldly watch this abstract performance—
But seeing him sweating, awkwardly wrestling with his own bones…
She let out a long, exhausted sigh.
"You're hopeless."
She stepped forward and knelt.
"Move. You'll only make it worse."
Her gloved fingers gently pushed his hand aside and carefully pressed against the misaligned bone.
Her voice was cold—but her touch was steady and careful.
"Endure it."
At that moment—
Down the street, a red figure peeked nervously.
Amber couldn't stay put anymore.
From a distance, under moonlight, she saw:
Eula kneeling before Yichen.
Her hand inside his clothes.
Yichen looking pained yet oddly… content???
They were way too close.
Amber's eyes went wide.
"WHAT AM I SEEING?!"
"Eula—YOU—?!"
"THIS FAST?!"
She clamped her hands over her mouth—
Then turned and sprinted like her life depended on it.
One thought looped endlessly:
"THIS IS BAD—!!!"
"EULA—EULA TURNED INTO A PERVERT—!!!"
Eula suddenly sneezed.
"…?"
Yichen groaned. "What's wrong?"
"…Nothing."
She frowned and focused again.
"Shut up. Don't move.
If you move again, I'll break it completely and let it regrow."
Above them—
Venti was dying.
He clutched his stomach on the rooftop.
"HAHAHAHA—INCREDIBLE—!"
"This plot direction—EVEN I DIDN'T SEE THIS COMING!"
"Yichen, you are a walking Mondstadt disaster generator!"