026: The Unsettling Feeling That Remains
Life in Antioch was vastly different from life in Rome. For Domitius, who had grown up in Rome, the most striking difference was the passage of time.
This small city stood in the northeastern part of the Mediterranean, a place of pervasive poverty. There were no beautiful gardens, no elegant halls, no inns with doormen. Only the aroma of the day's meals wafted through the neighborhoods, fed animals lazily yawned, distant barks of household dogs came from somewhere, and young children laughed and played noisily—everything seemed close enough to touch the ears.
Though she had only been here for two days, she inexplicably felt that time passed extraordinarily quickly here. The golden-haired girl also gradually learned that besides her teacher Novia, her grand-teacher Paul, and the saint Martha, there were eleven other apostles.
These eleven apostles were the direct disciples of Jesus, the Holy Son whom Novia preached about, but they all seemed to hold Paul in high regard.
Domitius came to this conclusion because Paul showed her a letter written to him by a man named Peter.
She had also asked her teacher where these people were now, to which Novia replied somewhat dismissively, "You'll have a chance to meet them in the future."
Since Novia had spoken this way, Domitius naturally refrained from asking further. To her, Novia's current status and position far surpassed her own. As his disciple and someone whose headaches Novia had alleviated, it was only right and reasonable to comply.
Ever since the golden-haired girl was entrusted by her mother Agrippina to Novia for baptism and became his disciple, Domitius had rarely seen Agrippina. This wasn't because her freedom to meet her mother was restricted, but because her mother was busy with court affairs, assisting Emperor Claudius.
As for what her mother wanted to achieve and the fact that she herself had become a bargaining chip, Domitius could say she accepted it.
Her father came from a noble family but was notorious for his cruelty and debauchery. Her mother, Agrippina the Younger, was also a member of the imperial family and naturally adept at scheming.
When she was three years old, her father died from excessive indulgence. The then Roman emperor, Caligula, ordered the confiscation of her inheritance and exiled Agrippina, who had attempted to seduce him and then plotted to assassinate him after failing. This left the young Domitius penniless...
Fortunately, she was taken in by her aunt, sparing her from ending up on the streets. However, her situation was precarious—surviving without being killed was already a stroke of luck, and the hardships of life were self-evident.
A year later, when the tyrannical Caligula was assassinated, the golden-haired girl's circumstances abruptly reversed. The newly enthroned Emperor Claudius, Caligula's uncle, promptly ordered the return of all her confiscated inheritance. Her mother Agrippina also successfully returned to Rome and had her reputation restored.
But Agrippina was no easy woman to deal with. Shortly after her return, she completely captivated the wealthiest man in Rome at the time, who fell at her feet. They held a grand and lavish wedding, after which, through her whispers, she persuaded the magnate to agree to bring her child to live with them and be raised together.
The result was, unsurprisingly, that within a few years, the magnate's wealth was entirely depleted by Agrippina's schemes, with large portions of the assets transferred to Domitius's name. Of course, the magnate also died.
Domitius was well aware that her mother was absolutely not a good person. She had a rough idea of why her mother entered the imperial palace and what she herself needed to do.
Over the years, there had been people who helped her and greeted her warmly, as well as those who kicked her when she was down, solely focused on climbing the social ladder. The entire Roman court had always been filled with intricate power struggles, especially evident when it came to securing interests. Open and covert conflicts were as common as the chirping of birds at dawn.
Therefore, when Domitius learned that her mother had arranged for her to be baptized by Novia, she wasn't shocked. Such things were not unusual in Rome.
A twelve-year-old in the ancient Roman Empire was already of marriageable age, and the individual had no power to choose, only passively accepting arrangements. So, she had initially thought that so-called "baptism" was a euphemism for a physical transaction. It was only the next day that she realized she had been mistaken.
However, Domitius herself found it strange. Aside from her body, she held no value to Novia. So why would Novia agree to such an unfavorable deal with her mother? Was it foolishness? Impossible. Someone who had achieved such status from scratch at a young age couldn't be a careless fool...
This point had always puzzled her. Even if Novia truly wanted a disciple, given her youth, she could have easily adopted an infant and raised them from childhood, rather than choosing someone like Domitius who was already capable of independent thought. This seemed incredibly disadvantageous no matter how she looked at it, especially since her mother was no easy woman to deal with either.
Although Domitius remained perplexed, it didn't hinder the golden-haired girl from holding a deep reverence for her teacher.
This likely stemmed from her childhood experience of ending up on the streets. Perhaps it was thanks to some help from ordinary people that she managed to survive until her relatives took her in. Therefore, she genuinely cherished the nameless masses. Consequently, she felt reverence for Novia, who was revered by the people, and for the ordinary days she shared with her.
However, even though the girl didn't particularly mind all of this, an unsettling feeling still lingered in her heart.
In the Roman court, everyone was entangled in a complex web of power and intrigue.
For instance, marriages between children would not happen unless there were sufficient shared interests between their parents.
For Domitius, growth was such an immediate and tangible concept.
It didn't necessarily mean being punished by someone—rather, even among those bound by blood, if one crossed the boundaries of interest or power, they could instantly become enemies as bitter as sworn foes.
"My student, if you need help, please tell me, Domitius."
Domitius had always felt that Novia was rather ambiguous in this regard. What constituted proper conduct, what counted as wrongdoing—everything remained vague until a fatal outcome made it clear.
"Teacher, saying that is actually useless."
"Tell me if you need help"—these words from the silver-haired boy offered Domitius no sense of reality at all.
"...So Roman nights could actually be this cold."
She still remembered murmuring this unconsciously when she found herself wandering the streets.
If she had little of value to exchange, she would surely be discarded sooner or later.
The unease she felt as a young golden-haired girl, abandoned by her parents that day, still lingered in her heart.
Note: I'm new to translating so please be kind and tell me any mistakes you all find, I will try to release a chapter a day but don't expect much
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