The celebration of her win with her teammates, no friends, reverberated in her ears. They were talking about the most random of things.
Events that happened in class, pranks that they pulled off, what they ate for breakfast, what dumb bets they made with each other… that last one was just Daiwa and Vodka now that she thought about it.
Anyways, she couldn't help a smile from spreading on her face as she heard their stories and their jokes. It was fun and relaxing at the same time for her. If anything, she desperately needed this. If only just to change her thoughts from what she realized she had done.
From how she had to burn a part of herself to win.
She could change her thoughts, she could focus on their stories, their jokes, and on things their juniors asked them for advice on.
She could focus on everything they were talking about instead of focusing on herself and on the race.
The race where she was the closest to losing that she has ever felt, second only to that day.
Alas, the celebration wasn't meant to last so she went back to the dorm slightly ahead of Gold Ship so that she could take a shower first.
…
The sound of water hitting her head and falling to the ground grounded her.
It stilled her thoughts and let her just rest.
She didn't want to think, not now at least she just wanted to take a shower then go to bed.
___
She was sinking again.
Just like before, she was sinking down into a black, gelatinous, void.
She could feel it wrap around her body, dragging her down slowly and surely.
It had been a while since she was last here.
Would she hear that oddly soothing voice again?
'You flatter me by calling me soothing, child.'
It seemed like she was.
Did something happen?
'Are you forgetting? And to think that, not even an hour ago, you were pondering the cost of it all.'
…I see, so you want to talk about… that.
'Of course I do. '
But why, it's not like I'll ever have to use it again.
'That is what you think, and sadly for you, fate is a cruel, cruel mistress. '
What do you mean?
'You do not simply believe that you will only face such a close match once, do you?'
…
'Of course you don't, you're terrified aren't you, oh sweet child of mine.'
She could feel a hand reach out and touch her cheek, almost caressing it, as the voice almost seemed to cry.
'You do not realize the burden that you have placed upon your body, have you? Or maybe you have and are simply ignoring the cost as a method to cope?'
I… her voice caught in her throat, she didn't know how to respond to the question.
'Please, promise me, oh sweet child that you will not touch upon that power.'
I… I cannot promise that I shall not utilize it.
'Why?' The being's voice asked, almost sounding broken, 'Why can't you promise, why would you even want to use that power, that which can burn all to ash? Why, why would you want to die?'
…Do you even need to ask?
'No… please don't say what I think you'll say…'
I will grant hope to all who witness my races, even if I must face oblivion. If that remains the only way I can grant hope, then I shall grant it.
'But…' the voice cracked. She could even hear tears flowing now, 'You'll die.'
She paused for a moment, and she considered what she could say before eventually… Yes, I know.
The voice stayed quiet and all she could hear were sobs, the voice was… crying?
Why? Why do you cry?
The voice hiccupped for a moment before snivelling and answering, 'Because my sweet child has grown so so much…'
What do you mean?
The snivelling and crying stopped for a moment before she felt her head be pressed in between something soft and warm and she felt her eyes flutter close, 'Please do not die, oh sweet child of mine, please do not die, oh love of my life, sweetest child I have ever known, please do not die, oh little Hope…'
Before she could respond, her eyes shut closed completely and she fell asleep once more.
____
When she next woke, it was morning outside, the sun was just rising, and the birds had started chirping.
She looked to her side and saw Gold Ship completely wrapped in a blanket like a cocoon snoring.
She just looked at her.
Before suddenly…
She felt a drop of water hit her hands.
"Huh?"
She brought her hands up to her eyes and wiped at them. What she got in return was… water?
"Am I… Crying?"
Then another drop fell.
But why?
And another.
Why was she crying?
And then another two.
Now that she thought about it… Why did that voice sound so familiar?
She sniffed hard.
Why did the sensations she felt feel so familiar?
She couldn't stop, she was openly sobbing now.
Why… why did she not realize earlier?
She repeatedly rubbed her eyes as the snoring stopped.
Had she truly forgotten her touch?!
Had she truly forgotten how she sounded?!
She was crying out now.
How did she forget her own mo-?
Suddenly she felt somebody hug her.
She paused.
"Gold Ship?"
"It's fine Hope, you can keep crying, don't worry, I won't tell a soul."
And then it started all over again.
-------
Authors note
Sorry for the late chapter, wait... I warned you guys though didn't I?
I did!
Anyway, sorry for making you guys wait. I really, and I mean really didn't want to take this long to make this chapter.
It doesn't help that I experienced some writer block as well during the making of this chapter.
I also decided to bring back the weird inner world that hope has. I just hope I didn't make a continuity error when I brought it back. It won't be returning for a while after this btw.
It's gone now, like gone gone.
It won't be coming back until after the Japan Cup or Arima Kinen, that is to say in a while.
on another note, please do tell me if the italics work now, I wrote this originally in word after all.
I also made sure to reveal a little bit more about the power that dwells within Hope.
So I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter.
because you aren't getting another one in a while.
sorry not sorry school is going to be beating my ass if I don't do this biweekly, I'm taking a huge risk even making this chapter anyway.
But... anyways,
this is,
GreekAntrielos,
Signing off.