Somewhere in the hall, Garrett stood in quiet conversation with a group of investors.
Eventually, I got to where my parents were seated. Their faces glowed with pride and relief.
"You held yourself beautifully". Mom said brushing a curl from my face.
"You were born for elegance". Dad added giving me a reassuring squeeze.
I smiled, though it didn't quite reach my eyes. I survived the day, that is something.
Garrett approach just immediately, holding a glass of champagne.
"Mr. and Mrs. Manne", Garrett greeted smoothly. "Thank you for being part of today".
My dad extended his hands. "You handled everything well".
Mom leaned in slightly, "we're trusting you Garrett to make this easy for her".
Garrett met her eyes with unreadable expression. "I don't make promises lightly but I keep the ones I do".
I stood silently between them, unsure how to read the conversation. My parents seem reassured, but I felt no such clarity.
With the final good byes said, dad and mom gathered their coats and gave me a quiet hug.
"We're proud of you". Mom whispered. "You were graceful today. No matter what happened, you held your head up high". She continued.
As my parents exited into the night, Garrett returned to my side. "Are you ready to leave now?". He asked.
We walked out together hand in hand with cameras flashing and cheers rising from our guests.
The car door clicked shut with a soft thud, we hopped into the slick black limousine. The world outside faded into a blur of light and applause as we pulled away from the venue.
I sat against the cool leather seat silently beside Garrett with my hands resting on my laps. My bouquet, long forgotten on the floor between us. My veil had been removed and tucked away by my stylist and now my hair was pinned up with perfection and tension. The new diamond ring felt heavy on my finger. I felt exhausted though not from the long day but from the weight of pretense.
I glanced sideways at him
Garrett leaned back against his seat with one arm casually stretched across the back rest and the other, resting on his knee. He looked untouched by the chaos of the day. He was very calm and composed.
"Do you always ride in silence after a wedding?" I asked with a light and careful tone.
Finally he spoke.
"You handled yourself well tonight". He said.
"Handled myself?" I asked turning my head towards him. "You made it sound like a business deal".
"We'll? I didn't realize that but every glace and smile, it was part of the image we agreed and you did it flawlessly". Garrett said reluctantly.
I exhaled slowly, turning back towards the window. The word "flawless" he used sounded less than a compliment and more like an assessment as though I was another investment in his portfolio.
"Glad to know I lived up to the expectation". I replied with a frown.
"Don't twist my words, I'm acknowledging you. You looked… he paused, his eyes tracing my profile for a moment. "... breathtaking, even the skeptics were convinced."
There was a softness in his voice then but it was fleeting, it was wrapped too tightly in calculations to feel genuine.
"Convinced of what exactly? That this is love? I asked.
The question hung in the air. The car's engine hummed, the city buzzed outside but between us, silence thickened.
Garrett shifted slightly, his jaw tightened before he replied.
"Convinced that we are what we need them to believe and that's enough". He hesitated.
"For you, maybe". I admitted.
My voice cracked slightly on the last word, though I masked it with a faint smile as if amused by his detachment. He caught it though, his sharp eyes missed nothing.
"You knew what this was from the beginning". He continued.
"Knowing it doesn't make it easier". I admitted.
For the first time, something flickered in his gaze. I could not place it, maybe hesitation or even regret.
He looked away, adjusting the cufflinks on his wrists as though the motion could distract him from the weight of my words.
"I'm not asking you to find it easy. I'm only asking you to endure it. There's a difference". He argued.
I pressed my lips together, fighting the urge to argue. What was the point? He was a man who built wall with his words. A man who could shut a person out even when sitting inches away from him.
The silence stretched again. The car crossed into the quieter streets leading towards his penthouse on the uler east side. The neon light faded into elegant lamp post and tree lined sidewalks.
After a long pause, I finally asked. "Do you ever wonder if you will regret this?
"Regret?" He asked turning his head towards me with his brows slightly lifted.
"Marrying someone you don't love. Making a spectacle for everyone else while keeping everything really locked away. I asked with curiosity.
He was quiet for a moment and finally spoke. "I don't waste time regretting choices that strengthen my position". He said, with a low voice".
Wow! Choices that strengthen his position? That struck hard, I tried to talk but couldn't find my voice.
I turned back to the window watching the lights blur past. My reflection stared back at me, a woman in pearls and lace who looked like she had everything and yet I felt like I had nothing.
The car slowed as it approached the grand building where his penthouse was awaited. The silence between us was louder than any words we could have spoken.
As the driver pulled up to the entrance and the doorman rushed to greet us. I smoothed my gown, lifted my chin and placed my mask of composure back on.
To the world, we were perfect. I had to make it look real.
We stepped out of the car and walked to the building. He placed his hand on the door but before he pushed it open, he leaned close.
"There's some
thing you should know before we go inside". He said with a wavering voice.