It started with a simple observation from Mew.
"Mew mew mew!" You got badges! We want badges too!
Marcus blinked. "What?"
"Mew!" Badges! Shiny! We want!
"Mew, you can't just—Legendaries don't DO Gym challenges."
Mew's eyes got very big. Very sad. Very WATERY.
"MEW..." But we want to be REAL trainers like you...
Marcus felt his resolve crumbling.
"I—you're not trainers, you're POKEMON—"
Celebi appeared next to Mew. "Bi bi!" We could LEARN to be trainers! We're very smart!
Jirachi materialized, still half-asleep. "Wish... to be... trainer..."
"That's not how wishes WORK, Jirachi!"
"Wish... granted... anyway..."
Within an hour, the entire Legendary population had assembled.
They wanted to do the Gym Challenge.
Not as Pokemon.
As TRAINERS.
"This is INSANE," Marcus protested.
"Roar," Groudon rumbled. Kenneth translated: "Groudon says we've watched you have fun battling and we want to try."
"You can't just WALK INTO GYMS. You're LEGENDARY POKEMON. You'd cause PANIC."
"We will be SUBTLE," Dialga declared.
"YOU'RE FIFTY FEET TALL."
"Subtly fifty feet tall."
THE COMPROMISE
After three hours of negotiation (mediated by Kenneth, who had somehow become the Legendary Council's official spokesperson), a compromise was reached.
The Legendaries would challenge the Johto Gyms.
BUT:
They would go in small groupsThey would use EACH OTHER as their "Pokemon"They would try not to destroy anythingIf they caused property damage, they would fix it
"This is still insane," Marcus said.
"This is DEMOCRACY," Mew countered. "We voted. Forty-three to one."
"Who was the one?"
"Kenneth. Kenneth abstained because Kenneth 'transcends mortal concepts like voting.'"
Kenneth vibrated smugly.
GYM ONE: VIOLET CITY (FALKNER - FLYING TYPE)
"Trainers": Mew, Celebi, and Jirachi
"Pokemon": Each other
The tiny Legendaries had formed a team.
Mew would "train" Celebi.
Celebi would "train" Jirachi.
Jirachi would "train" Mew.
It was a circular logic nightmare, but they were VERY excited.
Falkner stood in his Gym, ready for a normal day of battles.
The doors opened.
A floating pink cat, a green fairy, and a sleepy star-creature drifted in.
"Hello!" Mew announced. "We are here for badges!"
Falkner stared.
"Are... are those Legendary Pokemon?"
"We are TRAINERS," Celebi corrected. "Very normal trainers. Here for a very normal Gym battle."
"You're FLOATING."
"Normal floating. Human trainers float sometimes."
"They absolutely do NOT."
"They do NOW. We're starting a trend."
Falkner looked at his assistant.
His assistant shrugged helplessly.
"Do I... do I just battle them?"
"We would like that very much!" Jirachi said, briefly waking up. "I will use Celebi!"
"You'll WHAT?"
"CELEBI, I CHOOSE YOU!"
Celebi flew forward, striking a battle pose.
"Bi bi!" I'm ready to fight!
Falkner's brain short-circuited.
What followed was the most confusing Gym battle in history.
"Celebi, use Leaf Storm!"
Celebi used Leaf Storm.
Falkner's Pidgeotto was DEVASTATED.
"PIDGEOTTO!"
"Good job, Celebi! Return!" Jirachi held up an invisible Pokeball. "Celebi return!"
Celebi did not return. Celebi was not in a Pokeball. Celebi just floated there.
"Am I returned?" Celebi asked.
"I think so? I don't have a Pokeball."
"This is VERY irregular," Falkner protested.
"We're ADAPTING the rules," Mew explained. "Now it's MY turn! Jirachi, I choose you!"
"I was asleep!"
"Wake up! It's battle time!"
Jirachi groggily floated forward.
"Use... use Doom Desire!"
"That takes a turn to activate..."
"Then use it NOW so it activates LATER!"
"That's actually smart?"
Falkner's entire team was defeated in approximately four minutes.
Not because the Legendaries were trying hard.
But because even a SLEEPY Jirachi was stronger than anything Falkner had.
"We win!" Mew celebrated. "Badge please!"
Falkner, in a daze, handed over three Zephyr Badges.
"Wait, THREE badges?"
"There are three of us!"
"That's not how it WORKS—"
"It's how it works NOW," Celebi declared. "We're TREND SETTERS."
The three tiny Legendaries floated out of the Gym, each proudly wearing a badge.
Falkner sat down heavily.
"I need to call the League," he muttered. "I need to call SOMEONE."
GYM TWO: AZALEA TOWN (BUGSY - BUG TYPE)
"Trainers": The Swords of Justice
"Pokemon": Keldeo (he volunteered)
Cobalion had decided to approach this with DIGNITY.
"We are the Swords of Justice," it announced upon entering. "We seek to test ourselves through honorable combat."
Bugsy looked up from his bug collection.
He saw four massive Legendary Pokemon.
He fainted.
When Bugsy woke up, he was lying on a surprisingly comfortable bed made of leaves (courtesy of Virizion).
"Are you well, small human?" Terrakion asked, looming overhead.
Bugsy screamed.
"He is NOT well," Cobalion observed.
"Perhaps we should have announced ourselves more gently," Virizion suggested.
"We DID announce ourselves. We said 'We are the Swords of Justice.' That is a gentle announcement."
"For beings of our stature, yes. For humans, apparently not."
Eventually, Bugsy calmed down enough to battle.
Keldeo fought all three of Bugsy's Pokemon.
Alone.
Using only Secret Sword.
"This is the most one-sided battle I've ever participated in," Bugsy said quietly as his Scyther was launched through the wall.
"Keldeo is our youngest," Cobalion said proudly. "He shows great promise."
"He just knocked out my entire team in thirty seconds."
"Excellent promise."
GYM THREE: GOLDENROD CITY (WHITNEY - NORMAL TYPE)
"Trainer": Mewtwo (Not Steve, the OTHER one)
"Pokemon": Mew (who insisted)
The other Mewtwo—officially named "Bob" because Steve refused to share the name category—entered Whitney's Gym with intense determination.
"I WILL PROVE MYSELF TODAY," Bob announced.
"Mew mew!" And I'll help!
"You are my Pokemon for this battle. Please act like a Pokemon."
"Mew!" Got it! I'll be very Pokemon-like!
Whitney, who had rebuilt her confidence after Marcus's visit, stood ready.
"Another challenger! This time I'm prepared for—"
She saw Mewtwo.
She saw Mew.
"I'm not prepared for this."
"CLEFAIRY, GO!"
"MEW, I CHOOSE YOU!"
Mew flew onto the battlefield, immediately starting to play with its tail.
"Mew, focus!"
"Mew mew!" I'm focused! Watch! Mew continued playing with its tail.
"That's not—use PSYCHIC!"
Mew used Psychic.
Clefairy was launched into a wall.
Mew went back to playing with its tail.
"Good job. I think."
"Mew!" Thanks! This is fun!
Whitney's Miltank entered the battle.
The infamous Miltank. The run-ender. The nightmare of countless trainers.
Mew looked at it.
Miltank looked at Mew.
"Mew mew mew." Oh, you're the one everyone's scared of? You're cute!
"Miltank, ROLLOUT!"
The Miltank curled up and began its devastating rolling attack—
"Transform!" Bob commanded.
Mew transformed into an EXACT COPY of Miltank.
Two Miltanks collided.
The resulting impact knocked BOTH backwards.
"WHAT?!" Whitney screamed.
"Mew can copy any Pokemon," Bob explained. "Including yours. MEW-TANK, USE ROLLOUT!"
The Mew-Miltank began its own Rollout.
Two Miltanks rolling at each other.
Colliding.
Rolling again.
It was CHAOS.
"THIS IS NOT HOW GYM BATTLES WORK!" Whitney wailed.
"It is NOW," Bob declared.
Eventually, Mew-tank won by virtue of having Legendary-level stamina.
Whitney's Miltank collapsed, exhausted.
Mew transformed back, looking dizzy but happy.
"Mew mew!" That was fun! Again!
"We got the badge. We don't need to go again."
"Mew..." Aww...
Bob collected the Plain Badge with tremendous pride.
"I HAVE PROVEN MYSELF," he announced.
Whitney was crying again.
Some things never changed.
GYM FOUR: ECRUTEAK CITY (MORTY - GHOST TYPE)
"Trainers": Giratina
"Pokemon": The Lake Guardians
Morty had been warned.
The Legendary Beasts had told him. The spirits had told him. Even the GHOST POKEMON in his Gym had told him.
"They're coming," his Gengar had whispered. "The gods are playing trainer. Do not resist."
Morty had prepared tea. It was all he could do.
Giratina EMERGED from the wall.
Not entered. EMERGED.
The entire Gym darkened.
"WE HAVE COME FOR BADGES," Giratina announced in its echoing voice.
"Would you like some tea first?" Morty offered weakly.
"...TEA?"
"It's calming. You seem tense."
Giratina paused.
"WE... WOULD NOT MIND TEA."
Twenty minutes later, Giratina and Morty were having a pleasant conversation about the nature of the afterlife.
"So the Distortion World is more of a dimensional buffer than a realm of punishment?" Morty asked.
"CORRECT. IT IS OFTEN MISUNDERSTOOD. QUITE PEACEFUL, ACTUALLY."
"Fascinating. More tea?"
"PLEASE."
The Lake Guardians orbited nearby, also sipping tea (from tiny cups Morty had provided).
"This is nice," Mesprit said. "We should do this more often."
"I am learning many things," Uxie added. "This human has unique spiritual insights."
Azelf was too busy drinking tea to comment.
"So," Morty said eventually, "about the Gym battle...?"
"AH YES. WE MUST DO THAT." Giratina set down its comically small teacup. "UXIE, YOU ARE MY POKEMON FOR THIS BATTLE."
"Understood." Uxie floated forward serenely.
Morty's Gengar materialized.
"Gengar, Shadow Ball."
The attack launched.
Uxie didn't dodge. It simply looked at the Shadow Ball.
The Shadow Ball STOPPED.
"What—"
"I am the Being of Knowledge," Uxie explained. "I KNOW where your attack will be. And thus, I can choose for it not to be there."
"That's not how physics WORKS!"
"I am beyond physics. FUTURE SIGHT."
A blast of psychic energy appeared from a possible future and hit Gengar in the past.
The Gengar was confused.
The Gengar was defeated.
"I don't understand what just happened," Morty admitted.
"Neither do most beings. Have another cup of tea."
GYM FIVE: CIANWOOD CITY (CHUCK - FIGHTING TYPE)
"Trainer": Terrakion
"Pokemon": Cobalion and Virizion
Chuck was READY.
Fighting-types! His specialty! Finally, a challenge he could understand!
"LEGENDARY OR NOT, FIGHTING SPIRIT KNOWS NO BOUNDS!" he bellowed.
Terrakion nodded approvingly. "You have warrior's energy. I respect this."
"THANK YOU! NOW LET'S BATTLE!"
"Indeed. COBALION, I CHOOSE YOU!"
Cobalion stepped forward with dignified grace.
"Wait," Chuck said. "Cobalion is a Steel/Fighting type."
"Correct."
"So I have a type advantage!"
"Do you?" Cobalion's eyes gleamed.
"POLIWRATH, SURF!"
Water crashed toward Cobalion.
Cobalion simply WALKED THROUGH IT.
"HOW?!"
"I am the Iron Will Pokemon. I do not acknowledge attacks I consider beneath me."
"THAT'S NOT A REAL ABILITY!"
"It is now. SACRED SWORD."
One hit.
One KO.
Chuck stared at his fainted Poliwrath.
"Best two out of three?"
"If you wish. VIRIZION, YOUR TURN."
Virizion entered gracefully.
Chuck's Machamp entered confidently.
Two minutes later, the Machamp was defeated.
"Best THREE out of three?"
"We accept."
They fought until Chuck ran out of Pokemon.
Then Terrakion offered to spar directly.
They became friends.
GYM SIX: OLIVINE CITY (JASMINE - STEEL TYPE)
"Trainer": Dialga
"Pokemon": Palkia (they were trying to COOPERATE)
Jasmine had heard about the Legendary Gym Challenge.
Everyone had heard about the Legendary Gym Challenge.
It was ALL anyone was talking about.
"Please don't destroy my Gym," she begged when Dialga and Palkia entered.
"WE WILL BE CAREFUL," Dialga promised.
"WE WILL BE GENTLE," Palkia agreed.
"Your voices are shaking the foundations."
"...WE WILL WHISPER."
The battle was surprisingly civil.
Palkia fought Jasmine's Magnemite.
Palkia used Spacial Rend.
The attack was so precisely controlled that it ONLY hit the Magnemite and nothing else.
"Wow," Jasmine breathed. "That was surgical."
"WE PRACTICED," Palkia said proudly. "MARCUS TAUGHT US CONTROL."
"The Chen boy?"
"HE IS VERY WISE FOR A SMALL HUMAN."
Jasmine's Steelix emerged next.
This was a bigger challenge.
Literally.
The Steelix was massive.
Palkia was ALSO massive.
The Gym was NOT big enough for both.
"PERHAPS WE SHOULD MOVE OUTSIDE," Dialga suggested.
"Please," Jasmine agreed.
The battle continued in the city square.
Citizens watched in awe as two massive beings clashed—a Steel serpent and a Space dragon.
Palkia won, eventually.
But it was CLOSE.
"Your Steelix is very strong," Palkia complimented.
"Thank you! I raised her from a baby Onix!"
"WE CAN TELL. SHE FIGHTS WITH LOVE."
Jasmine beamed.
Dialga collected the badge with excessive ceremony.
"THIS REPRESENTS OUR FIRST STEP TOWARD COOPERATION," it announced.
"It's just a Gym badge—"
"IT REPRESENTS MUCH MORE."
The crowd applauded.
They weren't sure why.
But it felt appropriate.
GYM SEVEN: MAHOGANY TOWN (PRYCE - ICE TYPE)
"Trainer": Kyurem
"Pokemon": Reshiram and Zekrom
The Tao Trio had decided to make a STATEMENT.
They arrived together.
Walking in formation.
Side by side.
For the first time in eons.
Pryce, ancient and wise, recognized the significance immediately.
"The Tao Trio. Walking together. I never thought I'd see this day."
"NEITHER DID WE," Kyurem admitted. "BUT MARCUS HELPED US UNDERSTAND."
"Understand what?"
"THAT WE ARE STRONGER TOGETHER THAN APART."
Pryce nodded slowly. "Then let us test that strength. PILOSWINE!"
The battle was LEGENDARY.
Literally.
Reshiram and Zekrom fought together for the first time in millennia.
Fusion Flare and Fusion Bolt combined into an attack that had no name because it had NEVER EXISTED BEFORE.
Pryce's entire team was defeated.
But they were defeated with STYLE.
"That was... beautiful," Pryce admitted, sitting in the aftermath. "Terrible. Destructive. But beautiful."
"THANK YOU. WE HAVE BEEN PRACTICING."
"For how long?"
"THREE DAYS."
"You mastered THAT in three days?"
"MARCUS IS A VERY GOOD TEACHER."
Pryce made a mental note to meet this Marcus Chen person.
GYM EIGHT: BLACKTHORN CITY (CLAIR - DRAGON TYPE)
"Trainer": Rayquaza
"Pokemon": Groudon and Kyogre
This was the big one.
Dragon-type Gym versus the WEATHER TRIO.
Clair stood in her Gym, trying to project confidence.
She was not succeeding.
"So. You want badges."
"CORRECT," Rayquaza replied, coiled majestically in the center of the room.
"And you're using Groudon and Kyogre as your Pokemon."
"THEY VOLUNTEERED."
Groudon rumbled. Kyogre chirped.
"You're aware that I specialize in DRAGONS. And you ARE a dragon."
"TECHNICALLY, I AM A SKY SERPENT. BUT YES."
Clair took a deep breath.
"Let's do this. DRAGONAIR!"
The battle was INTENSE.
Clair's dragons were powerful.
But they were not LEGENDARY.
Groudon tanked hits like they were nothing.
Kyogre flooded the arena (then apologized and cleaned up).
And Rayquaza, acting as "trainer," provided strategic advice.
"KYOGRE, USE ORIGIN PULSE."
"GROUDON, PRECIPICE BLADES."
"NOW COMBINE THEM."
The resulting attack created a new GEOGRAPHICAL FEATURE outside the Gym.
"THAT'S TOO MUCH!" Clair screamed.
"APOLOGIES. WE ARE STILL CALIBRATING."
Clair's Kingdra was the last Pokemon standing.
It faced Kyogre.
Water versus Water.
Ocean god versus sea dragon.
"This is actually a fair fight," Clair realized.
"PERHAPS," Kyogre agreed. "LET US SEE."
The battle was GLORIOUS.
Hydro Pumps collided.
Water spouts emerged.
The entire Gym became an indoor ocean.
In the end, Kyogre won.
But barely.
"Your Kingdra is MAGNIFICENT," Kyogre said respectfully.
"Thank you. So are you." Clair smiled despite her defeat. "That was the best battle I've ever had."
"WE ARE HONORED."
Rayquaza collected the Rising Badge with tremendous dignity.
"THE WEATHER TRIO HAS COMPLETED THE GYM CHALLENGE," it announced.
"Congratulations," Clair said. "Now please drain my Gym."
"OH. YES. APOLOGIES."
AFTERMATH - POKEMON LEAGUE HEADQUARTERS
Lance stared at the reports.
Eight Gyms.
Challenged by LEGENDARY POKEMON.
Using OTHER LEGENDARY POKEMON as their team members.
Every single Gym Leader had been defeated.
"This is unprecedented," his aide said.
"I'm aware."
"What do we do?"
"We accept it." Lance sighed. "They followed the rules. Technically. They challenged, they won, they earned badges."
"But they're LEGENDARY POKEMON."
"And they wanted to participate. They wanted to be PART of the system instead of above it." Lance almost smiled. "That's actually... kind of beautiful, isn't it?"
"It's INSANE."
"That too. But beautiful insanity."
MARCUS'S REACTION
Marcus learned about the Legendary Gym Challenge after it was over.
He had been busy giving Kenneth a spa day.
"They did WHAT?!"
"Vee vee." Your Legendaries challenged all eight Gyms. They won.
"ALL of them?!"
"Pika pika." Every single one. There are videos. The Tao Trio one is trending.
Marcus looked at his assembled Legendaries.
They were all wearing their Gym badges.
Mew had pinned its badge to its forehead somehow.
Giratina's badge was floating in the Distortion World but was still visible.
Kenneth had apparently received an honorary badge for "moral support" despite not participating.
"You all... you all did the Gym challenge."
"WE WANTED TO BE LIKE YOU," Dialga said simply.
"To experience what you experience," Palkia added.
"TO UNDERSTAND WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH," Giratina concluded.
"And?"
The Legendaries exchanged glances.
"IT WAS FUN," Groudon rumbled.
"WE MADE FRIENDS," Kyogre chirped.
"WE LEARNED ABOUT OURSELVES," Rayquaza said.
"I had tea with the Ghost man," Giratina admitted. "He is very pleasant."
Marcus felt tears forming.
"I'm so proud of all of you."
The Legendaries made happy sounds.
And somewhere above, watching through his portal, Arceus shook his head in disbelief.
"They did Gym challenges," he muttered. "Gods of creation, time, space, weather, life, death, and reality itself... did GYM CHALLENGES."
"And they LOVED it," Event Arceus #7 added.
"I... I need to lie down."
"You're the supreme creator deity. You don't need to lie down."
"I need to CONCEPTUALLY lie down."
CURRENT STATUS:
Gym Badges Collected By Legendaries: 64 (8 Gyms × 8 teams, roughly)
Property Damage: Surprisingly minimal
New Geographical Features Created: 1 (accidental)
Morty's Tea Supplies: Depleted
Whitney's Crying Status: Ongoing
Clair's Indoor Ocean: Drained (eventually)
Kenneth's Honorary Badge: Proudly displayed
Legendary Satisfaction Level: Maximum
Marcus's Pride Level: Overwhelming
World's Sanity Level: Questionable
[A/N: THE LEGENDARIES DID GYM CHALLENGES AND IT WAS ADORABLE! Next chapter: The Elite Four learns that forty-three Legendary Pokemon now have Gym badges and want to challenge THEM! What could possibly go wrong? EVERYTHING! Leave a comment about your favorite Legendary Gym battle!]