Vera
I was terribly wrong. That Dunderhead is right in front of me as soon as I enter the dream. "What are you doing here again?" I say with an irritated expression. "M'lady it's terribly rude to say that to someone as soon as you meet them" He says and I can tell he's just making fun of me.
I don't like this dunderhead at all and the fact the I can not control him like I can control others in my dream outrages me. As a man he should just shut up since this is my dream. I don't want to hear a man talking my ear off even in my dream.
"Yeah to an actual person. You're just a figment of my own imagination in my dream so I can be as rude as I want with you."
It already angers me that I have to talk to men politely and submit to their demands while having no rights whatsoever in the real world. I don't want a man talking my ear off even in my dreams." I say while walking towards a cliff with a beautiful view and he follows me. "Your imagination is indeed extremely breathtaking M'lady" He says looking at the view.
"I have never seen a view like this in real life. This is just what I imagine what it must look like from the top of a cliff." I say looking at the view "But it looks better in real life" He says and I think I heard him wrong. "Did you say something?" I ask him and he looks like he got caught doing or saying something wrong "I meant to say that if this is just from your imagination then it must look even more breathtaking in real life" He says while looking over the view once again.
"Like I said....I wouldn't know what it's actually like since I have never seen a view from top of a cliff" I say with a sad tone. "Really?" He asked once again in disbelief. "Yeah I never got to be outside of london. My family is barely surviving here. My father came to london for a better life when I was 3 and we did get a better lifestyle than our hometown but we are not exactly rich. You can say we are middle class but considering my family's situation right now it won't be long before we will be considered below the middle class" I say explaining which I now realise is extremely weird because why am I talking to a figment of my own imagination in my own dream.
Have I really been so lonely that my mind gave me this figment? I know I always had good imagination but this seems a little too much. "M'lady don't lose hope. maybe one day you'll finally get to see a view from a cliff in real life." The dunderhead says again making me smile a little. "Maybe but until then I'm stuck in a nightmare called reality" I say with a bitter tone remembering the day I had today.
"What in the real life is troubling you M'lady? I mean other than the financial condition of your family. " He says like he can actually do something about it.
"I don't want to talk about it because it would bring me in low spirits and What would you do by knowing anyway?" I say while still admiring the view. "Nothing of course I just thought I might help you feel a little better" He says sitting down and I sit down next to him. "Maybe I'll talk more about my troubles some other time if you're still here. For now I just wish to enjoy this scenery in peace until the nightmare called reality takes me away from here" I say and admire the view in front of me.
It isn't long after that when I hear the voices of people around me and get up to see Cecelia trying out two different dresses in the room while Ellie is sitting there admiring her. "What is going on? What are you doing Cecelia?" I ask her and she looks at me like I've grown horns. "Don't tell me you forgot?" She asks me and I try to act like I know what she is talking about but I fail miserably.
"Of course you forgot. We were invited to a ball hosted by an acquaintance of father remember?" She says excitedly as she switches between the only two most expensive dresses we own.
She hands me over a blue dress and takes the red one for herself "this red one looks better on me so I'll take this and you take the blue one. You're not going to be looking for suitors anyway. It's been ages since we went to a ball." She says excitedly and yes It has been a while since we were invited to one. Actually we rarely get invited considering our family's situation nowdays but there are still some kind enough nobles who are acquainted with father that invite us sometimes.
Honestly I would prefer it if they didn't and not because I hate the balls. I love the balls. The dresses, the dance, the food, the decorations I love every single bit of it but what I can't stand is Men who keep trying to talk to me and my Mother who keeps trying to find a suitor there. That's the only reason that makes me hate balls. I sigh and take the dress. "I'm fine with anything Cecelia" I say and get up to get ready.
Wearing a dress and properly getting ready for a ball is a lot of work but I always end up loving what I look like after getting completely ready. I look at my reflection in the mirror. Dark black hair, light complexion, dark eyes, medium sized nose and red but a little chapped lips. I love how I look overall and feel confident enough in myself. "Vera Rose Frost you better get down here as soon as possible. We are getting late." I hear my mom shout again and go down immediately after admiring my reflection one last time.
The ride to the place was smooth except for the part where Mother kept lecturing us on how to behave like good ladies and make fine gentlemen approach us. We all get off the carriage and enter the the gate.
I can practically feel Cecelia's excitement and honestly I can not blame her. I would be lying if I said I am not tiniest bit excited. I am. The only issue are the suitors and my Mother. After a few pleasantries I slowly try to slip away between the crowd so I'm out of my Mother's field of vision. I bump into a few people but find my way to a quiet corner were I can just stand while simply admiring the decorations and other ladies' dresses.
Good lord these women have amazing taste in dresses but in men? Not so much.
After several moments of admiration and a third pie, I decide to stroll around the halls without attracting much attention. That's when I find a balcony that has a great view of the garden so I stand there admiring it from above. There are potential couples to be seen everywhere. Ladies trying to get themselves a fine suitor and I admire their efforts and respect their choices but also silently mourn the wasted potential of so many young women who could be so much more if given a chance. Maybe one day ladies wouldn't have to let their potential go to waste.
"But we can not figure out how it happened" My thoughts are interrupted by someone in the balcony next to me and what they said piqued my interest . I do not wish to evasdrop but is it really evasdropping if they're just willingly in my ear shot?
"A body was found in the forest with no signs of struggle or attacks, it's as if he just dropped dead out of the blue" I hear another person say. I can tell that there are at least three people talking to each other in the next balcony I hide myself behind the thick wall so they can not see me and try to listen further. Again it's not Evasdrooping if they're willingly in my earshot. It's a different thing that they do not know I am here.
"How could this be?" One of them says and the other two sigh. "We will have to ask Lord Vulcan for a favor so he can help us solve this case" Another one of them responds but the third person disagrees. "Lord Vulcan? I do not think we'll be needing his assistance" The third person says while others try to convince him that they do.
They also start talking about other details of the case and I hear the details very carefully which is entirely their own fault because as responsible gentlemen they shouldn't be talking about such cases out in the open. It is indeed not my problem that they happen to be in my ear shot.
They all leave after discussing a few more things and thanks to them I just got an idea for my new Novel which I will be starting tonight. Although just the idea itself isn't enough. I would also have to know more about the case which is clearly hard for me to know and I didn't even get to see their faces so I do not know where to get more leads from but what I do remember is that they were talking about some Lord named Vulcan who could help them solve this case so I can start by knowing more about this Lord Vulcan. Now I know it is just for a Novel but I like to get in detail.
I leave the balcony and get back to the main hall to find my sisters but I am caught by my Mother instead. "There you are you silly girl" She acts like I'm still not mad at her but I am so I don't react to anything she says. She grabs my arm and makes me greet another one of the suitors and this one also seems like every other nincompoop I have met so far.
He greets me and kisses my hand. I fake smile and act as polite as I can and then comes the worst part where he asks me to dance and I was about to say no until my mother nudged her elbow so harshly on me I thought my soul would leave my body for a moment.
Despite disliking the concept of finding a good match, I very much enjoy the idea of dancing in my ball gown. I say yes and we had a pretty decent dance except for a few times when he accidentally stepped on my feet.
As soon as the dance ends I find my mother walking up to me all terrific and excited about the chat we had while dancing. He attempted to talk to me a few times but my response was vague and strict so he gave up. I can't tell Mother that so I say "we had an amazing conversation" with a fake smile so she lets me go but of course she doesn't and starts asking me for more details so I knew what I had to do now. "Is that Ceclia with Lord Henry?" I say pointing towards my sister and my mother immediately looks away to see where I pointed at and I successfully take this opportunity to escape.
As I was escaping I thought I saw someone familiar. I could only see the person's back but I definitely have seen them somewhere. I do not remember where though. Considering how much I leave my house, there are very few people I see often, let alone someone worthy of remembering. If the person was important I would remember them.
Rest of the time was barely worth remembering and I could not find anything about that Lord Vulcan except just heard a few people mention him in a conversation and speak highly of him. I suppose I'll have to be patient and see what I can do with the information I have on the case right now. I can write a few chapters with my own imagination until I figure out more about this case. Of course this is purely for my Novel. I am not interested in the case myself but I must admit it is quite intriguing.
I take out my pages and start writing the first few chapters of the Novel. I wrote the first chapter 3 times and threw the paper in the trash. This is not how I want the story to be told. I take a deep breath and drop the quill for now and go back to sleep but my mind can not help but wander around. Sometimes my mind is my biggest enemy because at least I can escape other people but I can not escape my own mind.
Let's just forget about other things for now, I have to know more about that Lord Vulcan. Maybe I can get close to him during a ball and aquire more information about the case. He most likely wouldn't think much of it because what can a sweet lady like me even do with that information?
I don't know when I fall asleep and find myself in a dream again. But this time the scenario is today's ball, everything is exactly the same. Human mind never ceases to amaze me with the details it can remember even though I consciously do not remember any of the details.
I just remember it was pretty. I take a pie from the food stall and eat it. It tastes and feels exactly as real life. I'm just eating the pie in peace until I see someone familiar yet again. The dunderhead. I roll my eyes"How are you still here?" I say while gulping down my pie. "Greetings to you too M'lady and I must say you look ravishing today" He says bowing slightly and greeting me.
He looks around the scenario and sighs "so no manslaughter today M'lady? How very unlike you" He says taunting me and I grab the knife next to me. "How about we change that? I'd hate to disappoint you" I say sarcastically while pointing the knife at him. He laughs and takes the knife away and I let him because I am honestly not in the mood for that.
"But I must say I am surprised that you dream of balls too" He says looking around. "Well I went to one today and it was terrific except for the part where my Mother kept pushing me to acquire a suitor which is what happens every time I attend a ball." I say taking a drink from the table next to me. "A ....suitor?" His tone seemed a little off for some reason.
"Well you know young ladies are told to find one and apparently time is ticking because I am turning 21 next month and Mother can not stand that" I say and take another drink. "And I suppose you are extremely against it?" He asks as if it isn't obvious. "Lord heavens whatever gave you that idea?" I say sarcastically and he laughs.
"But tell me M'lady what do you wish for? I take it you are a very ambitious person so you must have a dream, am I correct?" He asks taking few grapes from the table and I see no harm in telling him a little bit more about my ambition. "I wish to become a published author" I say and to my surprise he doesn't react negatively to it. Of course he doesn't he's a figment of my own mind so he would always be supportive of me that only makes sense.
"So what Novels have you written so far?" He asks as if he's genuinely curious about my work. "Well I used to write poems and short stories but I started writing my first ever Novel 4 months ago and just as it was about to be finished my mother set it to fire because I rejected a suitor" I say trying not to get too emotional remembering it.
"That's..... " I can sense the pity in his tone. "Don't try to make me feel better, it won't work. Now moving on, my Father encouraged me let go of it and write an even better Novel than that one" I say with a smile and he returns it "now that's sweet" He says and I nod. "I already have an idea for the Novel. Today during this ball I heard a few gentlemen talk about a case that could potentially be a murder. The body was found in the forest with no signs of struggle and they can not determine the cause. It caught my attention and I'm gonna get inspired by this case to write my new Novel." I say enthusiastically.
Maybe I was thinking too much but his demeanor seemed to change a little as soon as I mentioned that case. "What .... Else did you hear M'lady" He asked but his tone is not the same anymore. "I could not hear more except for the part that they mentioned some Lord Vulcan who could help them solve this case and apparently he is brilliant" I say and he murmers something to himself "what did you say?" I ask and he is back to his normal demeanor. "I'm sure he is brilliant M'lady but I must say you should not get involved in this. It might get dangerous"
I'm irritated again. "Of course I shouldn't afterall it is no place for a lady am I right? A lady should just stay inside and do the house chores, shouldn't she?" I snap and ramble on for a while but I notice he isn't trying to stop me or argue otherwise. "Why are you just standing there and not saying anything?" I ask and he finally starts talking "M'lady I didn't say that because you're a woman who should stay inside, I said that because it's dangerous for any normal civilian to get involved in such cases. I would say the same thing to a boy your age too. There's nothing gender based about it"
He says explaining and I must admit he makes sense that's the second time I've said something like that about a man. The first time was with my Father when he defended me against mother when I was 7 and started reading. Of course the second man I say that about is a figment of my own mind.
"So why did you let me ramble on instead of stopping me?" I ask and he smiles "you have a lot of resentment towards men inside of you and it's valid resentment and you deserve to let out your rage so I do not wish to interrupt you. Suppressing it won't do any good now would it?" He says and it actually makes me smile a little.
"A man who understands women's resentment towards men? And supports women's ambition? No wonder you're not real" I say and he says something under his breath. "What do you keep murmuring to yourself? "Nothing just.....You'd be surprised by how many men like that might actually exist in real life" I laugh in disbelief "and what do you know about real life? You are not even real" I say but for some reason I feel bad for saying that.
Although, He doesn't seem to take it personally. "What I mean is M'lady you must keep an open mind and maybe you will infact find someone like that in real life" He says and I laugh in disbelief yet again. "You have no idea what men are like in the real world" I say and I thought I heard him say "You'd be surprised M'lady"
Before I can ask him to repeat himself It's time to wake up. "See you later M'lady" He says and I am back in my bed opening my eyes. I find Ellie hugging me and I smile at her "did you hear the news?" She asks me and I don't know what She's talking about "of course not Ellie I just woke up" I say getting up "Cecelia says she might get engaged to Lord Henry" I roll my eyes. "She says that after talking with every suitor she comes across and it never ends up in engagement" I say and look in the mirror. "Lord heavens do I look messy" I say to myself.
"No but this time Lord Henry has sent us some gifts this morning. That has never happened before" Now that caught my attention "really?" I ask her and she nods. I don't waste any more time in my room and immediately run downstairs looking for her. "Mother do you see this necklace, it's so pretty" I hear Cecelia's voice and immediately smile.
"Now that is a beauty" I say and Cecelia looks at me with a smile "I know right?" She says admiring her necklace. "I meant you silly. You make the necklace look even more beautiful" I say and she shruggs me off. Mother seems very happy with this and I'm glad she will be occupied in getting Cecelia and Lord Henry together for a while and hopefully will not be focusing on me anytime soon. I can write my Novel in peace and also maybe try to gather more information about that case.
I need to get close to that Lord Vulcan if I want to keep an eye on this case. I get back to my room and clean up for today.