Chapter 5: Pilot Modern Family II
After she handed her shift to someone else (Brenda only worked Saturday mornings), we wandered around the mall for a while and later found a more secluded spot to make out.
A few hours later, we grabbed a cab -first stopping at her house, then heading to Jay's. I decided to tag along with them for dinner instead of going straight there, so I could shower first.
"Hi, Gloria," I greeted when I spotted her in the kitchen. "Do I need to talk to Manny?"
"No need, he's already fine. He even found another girl to be interested in while we were walking through the mall," she replied, pulling a face at the last part.
Jay sighed in exasperation beside her.
Gloria went to get ready for dinner while I approached Jay. "Let me guess -another very beautiful girl, and way too old for him."
"Yep," Jay confirmed, taking a sip of his whiskey.
"Well, I'll get ready too," I remarked, already heading to my room.
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When I came out dressed, I raised an eyebrow. "What the hell are you wearing, Jay?" I asked, eyeing his multicolored coat and bejeweled cap.
"He decided to feel young again," Gloria explained for him.
"And you decided to go straight back to being twelve?" I teased with a hint of sarcasm.
"Jake, be a little more supportive," Gloria gently scolded.
"I'm trying. Otherwise, I'd be asking why he looks like a cartoon Christmas tree."
Jay huffed and went to change without saying a word.
"See?" I told Gloria. "Now he looks like a teenager throwing a tantrum."
Gloria lightly slapped my arm but chuckled soon after.
"Why did he do that anyway?" I asked, still amused by the outfit.
"Some idiot mistook him for my father," Gloria explained. "So he wanted to feel younger."
"He does have a daughter at your age," I pointed out.
"I'm two years younger," Gloria snapped, her accent thickening.
I was pretty sure I'd heard fourteen months, but I thought it was best not to correct her.
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The four of us got into the car - Jay driving, Gloria in the passenger seat.
"Is there anything I should know?" I asked. "I only know that Mitchell's boyfriend's name is Cameron Scott Tucker, also known as Cam."
"Cam's a drama queen," Jay muttered.
Gloria swatted his arm. "He's great, just like Mitchell. Don't worry, Jake - they'll love you," she reassured me.
"I'm not really worried," I murmured, giving Manny a light nudge. "Come on, Manny, talk to me. Haley and Alex will be at dinner. Unlike me, you don't have any blood relation." I kept nudging him.
I caught Jay watching me through the rearview mirror, while Gloria reprimanded, "Jake!"
"What? You're always talking about family bonding," I defended myself.
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Jay knocked on the door before opening. "Knock, knock, we're here! Coming in!" he announced, peeking in before fully pushing it open.
"Jay doesn't like seeing affection between his sons," Gloria explained his loud entrance.
"Not a bad idea - especially if you're about to walk into a bedroom," I admitted in a general tone. (Not everyone has my habit of locking the door. The few times I didn't… weren't accidents.)
"Don't worry, Dad, nothing gay going on here," Mitchell called from inside.
"Hi hi," Jay greeted everyone as he finally swung the door open and stepped in.
"Hey, Jay," Phil called, walking closer.
"Gloria, hi!" Claire greeted, giving Gloria a hug.
"Hi Gloria, how are you? What a beautiful dress!" Phil added enthusiastically.
"Thank you, Phil!" Gloria replied with a smile.
"Oh, okay." Phil began feeling the texture of Gloria's dress until Claire slapped his hand and pulled him back. "Phil! She said Phil, not feel!"
"You must be Jake. Nice to meet you!" Mitchell said, shaking my hand. "And my condolences."
"Thanks, Mitchell. Pleasure to meet you too," I responded.
"So, how was your trip?" Jay asked as everyone settled in.
"It was good, it was good actually," Mitchell began, "but… about that, I have something I need to tell you guys. We didn't just go to Vietnam for pleasure. We kinda have some big news."
"Oh God, if Cam comes out here with boobs, I'm leaving!" Jay blurted.
"Dad!" Claire scolded.
"Why do it in Vietnam?" I wondered aloud, confused. "We're next to Hollywood - if there's one thing this place doesn't lack, it's people who do silicone implants."
Haley, ignoring my remark, muttered sarcastically to her mother, "I hope he didn't embarrass you, Mom."
"Don't mind her," Claire explained. "Haley had her first boy over today, and Phil shot him."
"Nice going, Phil!" I patted his back, earning an awkward smile from him.
"Anyway," Mitchell continued, "so about a year ago, Cam and I started feeling this longing for something more - like, maybe a baby."
"Woooh, that's a bad idea," Jay interjected.
"What do you mean, bad idea?" Mitchell challenged.
"Well, kids need a mother! I mean, if you two guys are bored, get a dog!" Jay declared.
"We're not bored, Dad!" Mitchell protested.
"I support you, Mitchell," Gloria cut in. "And though you're not my son-"
"I think what Dad is trying to say," Claire interrupted, "is that you're a little uptight, Mitchell. Kids bring chaos, and you don't handle chaos well."
"That's not what Dad is saying," Mitchell snapped back. "That's what you're saying -and it's insulting in a completely different way."
"Yeah, Mitchell, kids need a sister or a brother. Why not adopt two?" I added. Having lived in a group home (orphanage) myself, I was genuinely supportive of adoption.
They all stopped and stared at me.
"You're not helping, Jake," Claire remarked dryly.
"Oh right, I forgot - here, 'helping' means insulting Mitchell," I retorted.
"Oh, I already like this new family addition," Mitchell commented with a grin.
"Hey, where's Uncle Cameron?" Alex suddenly asked.
"Finally, thank you!" Mitchell exclaimed. "Someone who's not insulting me actually noticed he's missing!"
"Oh, so that's the big announcement," Jay guessed. "You two broke up. Well, a baby wouldn't have helped that anyway! And you know what? You'll be better off - he was a bit of a drama queen."
"No, no, no! Stop, stop!" Mitchell raised his voice. "You come into my house and insult me and my boyfriend - who, by the way, is not that dramatic!"
Cameron finally appeared, holding a baby up like in The Lion King, with the same music playing in the background.
"We've adopted a baby. Her name is Lily," Mitchell said, looking slightly awkward, given how the scene contradicted his earlier words about Cam not being dramatic.
I laughed out loud. "It's going to be so funny telling this story when Lily grows up. Our little Simba just joined the Pritchett family."
Everyone turned to look at me again.