The glowing blue arrow was the most infuriatingly helpful and terrifying thing I had ever seen.
It hovered just above the mossy ground, a shimmering, translucent pointer leading me deeper into the whispering bamboo forest. My life was now being directed by a supernatural GPS with a sarcastic streak. I followed it, my mind a chaotic whirlwind of panic, disbelief, and a tiny, stubborn spark of excitement that I was trying very hard to smother.
This wasn't the time for excitement. This was the time for sheer, unadulterated terror.
Every rustle in the undergrowth made me jump. Every strange bird call sounded like a predator sizing me up. My modern, city-slicker brain was hardwired to see danger in shadows, and this place was nothing but shadows and unknown sounds. I was pretty sure the most dangerous animal I'd ever encountered was a particularly aggressive pigeon. Here, I'd probably be considered a tasty snack for the local equivalent of a squirrel.
"Okay, System," I muttered, my voice a low hum against the forest's quiet. The interface had minimized to a small, pulsing blue dot in the corner of my vision, but I knew it was listening. "A little context would be nice. What's a 'li' in measurable distance? Kilometers? Miles? How many steps until I stop being 'spirit-beast sustenance'?"
The system didn't respond. The arrow continued to point relentlessly forward.
"Right. Strong, silent type. Got it."
I trudged on. The air was still incredibly clean, but now it felt heavy, charged with an energy I couldn't name. It was like walking through an invisible, gentle current. My body felt both weary and weirdly alert. My $20 sneakers were not designed for this. They were soaked, the soles offering no protection from the gnarly roots that seemed to deliberately snake out to trip me.
After what felt like another eternity, the arrow suddenly veered to the left, pointing towards a particularly dense thicket of bamboo.
"Through there?" I groaned. "You've got to be kidding me. Is this some kind of hazing ritual?"
I pushed aside the thick, leafy branches, wincing as they scraped against my arms. The moment I stepped through, the world opened up.
The bamboo gave way to a small, hidden clearing. And in the center of that clearing, growing from a crack in a large, moss-covered rock, was a flower. It was unlike anything I had ever seen. Its petals were a deep, luminous violet, and they seemed to glow with their own inner light, pulsing softly like a heartbeat. A sweet, almost intoxicating fragrance filled the air around it, a stark contrast to the earthy scent of the forest.
It was beautiful. And it was very, very obviously magical.
As I stared, a new system window popped into existence, obscuring my view of the miraculous plant.
New Quest Received: A Token of Affection.
Objective: Pluck the 'Whispering Heartbloom' from the Mossy Stone.
Success Reward: Spirit Herb Identification Skill (Basic), System Favor +1.
Failure: Lingering sense of botanical inadequacy.
I blinked. "A Token of Affection? What does that even mean? And 'Lingering sense of botanical inadequacy'? Are you making fun of me?"
The system remained silent. The quest window hovered, waiting.
I looked from the glowing text to the glowing flower and back again. This was it? My first real mission in a cultivation world wasn't to slay a beast or learn a kung fu move. It was to pick a flower. A part of me was disappointed. Another, much larger part, was profoundly relieved.
"Alright, fine. I can do flowers." I took a step towards the Mossy Stone. "I'm a great flower picker. Champion-level, even."
I took another step. The fragrance grew stronger, sweet and cloying. It was nice, but also a little… much. Like cheap air freshener in a taxi.
I reached out my hand, my fingers inches from the delicate stem. This seemed too easy. In the stories, things were never this easy. Magical flowers were always guarded by magical snakes, or had thorns that secreted instant-death poison, or were actually the tooth of a sleeping earth dragon.
I hesitated, my hand hovering. "System? Any hidden dangers I should know about? Venomous barbs? Territorial sprites? Anything?"
No response. The blue dot pulsed innocently.
"Great. Fantastic. Your user support is truly top-tier."
Gritting my teeth, I decided to just go for it. I wrapped my fingers around the stem. It was cool and smooth, like polished jade. I gave it a gentle tug.
It didn't budge.
I frowned. I pulled harder. Nothing. It was like the flower was rooted to the stone itself. I put my other hand on the mossy rock for leverage and yanked with all my might.
The flower came free with a soft pop.
And the world erupted.
A wave of pure, fragrant energy exploded from the base of the flower, visible as a shimmering violet pulse. It hit me square in the chest, not with force, but with… emotion. A sudden, overwhelming sense of giddy infatuation. My head swam. For a blissful second, all my fear and anxiety vanished, replaced by a warm, dopey feeling of contentment. I saw the forest in a new light. It wasn't terrifying; it was beautiful! The bamboo was so tall and graceful! The birds were singing such lovely songs!
I stumbled back, clutching the flower to my chest like a treasured prize, a goofy smile plastered on my face.
That's when I heard the shriek.
It was a high-pitched, furious sound that cut through my chemically-induced bliss like a knife. I turned, my movements slow and syrupy.
Standing at the edge of the clearing was a girl.
And she was, without a doubt, the most beautiful person I had ever seen in both of my lives. She looked to be around my age, with pale, flawless skin and long, dark hair that was intricately braided and pinned back from her face. She wore robes of pale blue and white silk that seemed to flow around her like water, making my damp t-shirt and jeans feel even more pathetic. Her eyes, the color of a deep, still lake, were wide with what I mistook, in my lovesick state, for admiration.
"Oh, hello," I slurred, my voice dreamy. "Are you a forest spirit? You're very pretty."
Her eyes, which a moment ago were wide, narrowed into slits of pure, icy fury. The air around her grew cold. I could literally see my own breath misting in front of my face.
"You…" she hissed, her voice low and trembling with rage. "You defiled it! You crude, ignorant… barbarian!"
The venom in her voice was a bucket of cold water on my floral high. The warm fuzzies receded, replaced by a chilling dread. I had really, really messed up.
"I… what?" I managed, holding up the flower. "This? The system told me to!"
"Do not speak to me of systems!" she snapped, taking a step forward. Her hand went to the hilt of a slender sword I hadn't noticed at her waist. It looked very, very sharp. "That Heartbloom has been gathering spiritual energy for a decade! It was meant for… for important alchemy! Not for some… some grubby mortal to yank out of the ground like a weed!"
Grubby mortal? Okay, that one stung a little.
"Look, I'm sorry," I said, taking a step back and raising my free hand in a placating gesture. The other still clutched the flower. "It was a misunderstanding. A quest misunderstanding! See, there's this text box…" I gestured vaguely at the air around me.
She wasn't listening. Her gaze was locked on the flower in my hand. "You have tainted it with your clumsy handling. The energy release… it's wasted!" She drew her sword. The sound of metal sliding from its scabbard was horrifyingly final. "I should make you pay for your insolence!"
This was bad. This was very, very bad. I was about to be skewered by an angry, ethereally beautiful cultivator over a flower. My life was going to end because of a floral misunderstanding. I had to think. Modern logic, Li Wei! Use it!
"Wait!" I yelled, my voice cracking. "I can fix this!"
She paused, her sword pointed at my heart. Her expression was one of supreme skepticism. "Fix it? How?"
My mind raced. The energy had been released as a feeling. A feeling of… affection. An idea, born of desperation and a lifetime of watching terrible romantic comedies, sparked in my mind. It was stupid. It was suicidal. It was my only shot.
"The energy isn't wasted!" I declared, trying to sound confident. "It was… redirected! For a higher purpose!"
Her brow furrowed. "What purpose?"
I took a deep breath. "This." I thrust the flower towards her. "A token of my… my apology! For my crude, barbaric behavior! The energy of infatuation is now a genuine, heart-felt apology! From me! To you!"
I stood there, arm outstretched, offering the slightly crumpled, now pulsing-very-faintly flower to the armed and dangerous woman who wanted to kill me. The silence that followed was heavier than any I had ever experienced. I could hear the blood pounding in my ears.
She stared at the flower, then at my face, then back at the flower. The fury in her eyes was now mixed with a profound, bewildered confusion. I could see the gears turning in her head. My logic was so absurd, so utterly illogical by the rules of her world, that it had short-circuited her anger.
"You… you are the most foolish person I have ever encountered," she said, but her voice had lost its homicidal edge. It was now just… exasperated.
Suddenly, a new voice cut through the clearing. "Sister Bai! Is everything alright? We heard a disturbance."
A young man, dressed in similar but less elaborate blue robes, emerged from the bamboo. He had a pleasant, open face, and he looked at the scene with wide-eyed curiosity: me, a disheveled stranger in bizarre clothing, holding a glowing flower out to his clearly irritated companion, who had her sword drawn.
The girl—Sister Bai—sighed, a sound of utter defeat. She sheathed her sword with a graceful, irritated flick of her wrist. "It is nothing, Luo Chen. Just a… a lost child causing a nuisance."
A lost child? I was probably older than her! I opened my mouth to protest, but one look from her silenced me. It was a look that promised painful retribution if I said another word.
The young man, Luo Chen, looked at me properly. His eyes took in my jeans, my t-shirt, my general air of soggy confusion. "A lost child? From where? Those are… strange garments." He took a step closer, his head tilted. "Are you alright, friend? You look pale."
I probably did. I'd just nearly been turned into a kebab.
"I'm… lost," I admitted, which was the most true thing I'd said all day. I lowered the flower, feeling incredibly stupid.
Quest Updated: A Token of Affection.
Objective Failed: Flower was not plucked with pure, romantic intent.
New Objective Achieved: Offer flower as a panicked apology to an angry cultivator.
Calculating Alternate Reward…
Reward Granted: +1 to Charm. +3 to Perversion.
New Relationship Unlocked: Bai Yuxuan. Affinity: -5 (Annoyed).
My eyes widened. Perversion +3? Why? Because I offered a girl a flower? And her name was Bai Yuxuan. And she was already at -5 Affinity. Fantastic. Just perfect. This system had a warped sense of cause and effect.
Bai Yuxuan seemed to sense the system's notification, or perhaps she just saw my panicked expression. She shot me a look that could freeze lava. "Do not… do whatever it is you are doing," she whispered harshly.
Luo Chen, oblivious to our silent exchange, smiled warmly. "Lost, are you? You're in the woods surrounding the Whispering Bamboo Sect. It's easy to get turned around. My name is Luo Chen. This is Senior Sister Bai Yuxuan."
The Whispering Bamboo Sect. The system's original quest. I'd found it. Or, more accurately, it had found me.
"Li Wei," I said, my voice hoarse. "My name is Li Wei."
"Well, Li Wei," Luo Chen said, clapping a friendly hand on my shoulder. I flinched. "You look like you've been through an ordeal. Come on. We'll take you back to the sect. The elders will know what to do with you."
Bai Yuxuan made a sound of disapproval but said nothing. She turned and began walking, her back straight and proud, clearly wanting to put as much distance between us as possible.
I stood there, holding my stupid, magical, problem-causing flower. I had completed a quest, sort of. I had gained a point in Charm and three whole points in Perversion. I had met a beautiful girl who now actively disliked me. And I was being invited to the very place I needed to go.
As I stumbled after Luo Chen, with Bai Yuxuan's icy presence leading the way, I looked down at the flower in my hand. Its glow was fading, its petals starting to wilt.
"A token of affection," I muttered to myself. "Right."
I tossed the flower into the ferns. It landed with a sad, quiet rustle. My first mission was complete. I had survived. And I had never been more confused in my life.
The adventure, it seemed, was just getting started.
To be continued...