The Naka Shrine was, frankly, depressing.
Ren adjusted the high collar of his clan robes, trying not to itch. Seriously, who designed these? They were great for looking brooding and mysterious, but terrible for ventilation. It was like wearing a turtleneck sweater in a sauna.
"Stop fidgeting," his father, Satoshi, muttered, looking stern.
"I'm not fidgeting," Ren whispered back. "I'm just adjusting my tactical neck protection."
Satoshi sighed. The man had the patience of a saint, which was rare for an Uchiha. Usually, Uchiha came in two flavors: 'I am better than you' and 'I will burn this village to the ground.' Satoshi was a rare 'I just want to finish my shift and go home' type.
Ren followed his father into the underground meeting hall. It was dimly lit, smelling of old wood and ego.
So this is where the magic happens, Ren thought, glancing around. And by magic, I mean old men arguing about who has the shinier eyes.
He didn't know much about the detailed history of Naruto. He'd watched some "Top 10 Uchiha Moments" videos and saw the cool fight scenes on YouTube, but he had skipped the boring filler episodes where they explained the politics. He knew Itachi eventually kills everyone. He knew the Nine-Tails attacks eventually.
But dates? Years? No clue.
I am winging this so hard, Ren admitted to himself as he sat down in the 'Neutral' section next to his dad.
At the front of the room, on the raised platform, sat the Clan Head. Next to him stood his son, Fugaku.
Ren squinted at Fugaku. The guy was eighteen, arms crossed, chin up, looking at the ceiling like he was posing for an album cover.
Look at him, Ren thought, amused. 'I am the Heir. My burden is heavy. My conditioner is expensive.'
To be fair, Fugaku was the strongest of the younger generation. But Ren knew the tea—Fugaku wasn't the strongest in the whole clan. There were plenty of crusty old veterans in this room who could probably fold the kid like a lawn chair if they wanted to.
Hence, the meeting.
"The situation with Amegakure is stable, but tense," the Clan Head announced, his voice booming. "The Hokage has requested our forces be placed on Standby for immediate deployment."
"Standby?" Yashiro, the resident loudmouth from the Hawk faction, stood up. "We should be marching! The Uchiha shouldn't wait for permission!"
Sit down, sparky, Ren thought.
"We wait," the Clan Head cut him off, "because we are disciplined. And when we deploy, we do it properly."
He unrolled a scroll.
"The vanguard units have been selected. Leading the First Squad will be my son, Fugaku."
Fugaku nodded stoically. Of course he did.
"And joining his squad..." The Clan Head turned his eyes to the Neutral section. "From the lineage of Elder Kaede... Mikoto Uchiha."
Ren blinked. He looked to his left.
Sitting quietly behind an old man with a beard that could rival Dumbledore's was a girl. Mikoto. She looked about Ren's age—fifteen—and she was pretty. Like, really pretty. But she also looked like she wanted to be literally anywhere else.
"Elder Kaede," the Clan Head said smoothly. "Your granddaughter is a talented sensor. My son requires the best eyes to watch his back. I trust you agree?"
Wow, Ren thought. Subtle as a brick.
It was a classic power play. Fugaku needed the support of the Neutrals to secure his position as the next Clan Head. What better way than to shove the Neutral Elder's granddaughter into a squad with him? Trauma bonding 101.
"We are honored," Elder Kaede said, bowing his head.
Mikoto bowed too. "I will do my best, Fugaku-sama."
Fugaku looked down at her and gave a nod that was probably meant to be reassuring but came off as arrogant.
Great, Ren thought. So that's how the parents of Sasuke get together. Arranged forced proximity. Romantic.
"Moving on," the Clan Head continued. "The Second Squad will be led by Captain Satoshi."
Ren froze. Wait, what?
Satoshi stood up. "Sir."
"Satoshi, your experience is vital. You will take a mixed unit. And since your son, Ren, has recently awakened the three-tomoe..." The Clan Head's eyes landed on Ren. "He will serve under your command. It is safer for a fledgling genius to be watched by his father than a stranger."
Ren felt a collective stare from the room.
Oh, fantastic, Ren thought sarcastically. Nepotism. My favorite.
"We are on standby starting tonight," the Clan Head finished. "Dismissed."
As the room cleared out, Ren walked beside his father, rubbing his temples.
"So," Ren deadpanned. "Take your kid to work day?"
Satoshi didn't smile. "It's better this way, Ren. If you were in Yashiro's squad, he'd use you as bait. If you were in Fugaku's squad, you'd be a political pawn. In my squad, I can make sure you don't die."
Ren looked at his dad. Okay, that was actually really sweet.
"Thanks, Dad," Ren said. Then he grinned. "Does this mean I get a pay raise?"
"No."
As they exited the shrine, Ren saw Fugaku and Mikoto standing near the gate. Fugaku was talking, probably trying to sound inspiring about the "Honor of the Clan," and Mikoto was nodding politely while looking like she was mentally writing a grocery list.
Ren sighed.
He was stuck on standby for a war he knew nothing about, armed with a cheat skill that barely worked because the air was too thin, and his 'perfect chakra control' was his only real weapon.
Well, Ren thought, looking at the moon. I guess I have some time before we march. I should probably figure out how to turn this 'perfect control' into something that goes boom.