KABOOOM!
An explosion tore through what remained of the ruined structures, blasting stone, metal, and unlucky dwarves across the field. The Moth Pole—once a cold, miserable prison mine—had become a full-scale battlefield. Scattered guards and prisoners exchanged fire with the invaders, who advanced in rows of black, steam-powered armor.
Their ambush had failed. Now all they could do was try to shoot the invaders' armor at the exposed hydraulics—assuming they could hit such a tiny point while being shelled nonstop.
On another flank, the guards' own steam armors held out better than the foot soldiers. But even they were losing ground. Outnumbered and outgunned.
Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.
One guard armor crouched behind a broken column, pinned down by two enemy armors marching toward him with relentless cannon fire.
"Dancer, this is Prancer," crackled a voice through his comm. "I'm coming in hot in 4… 3… 2… 1!"
CRASH!
A hammer-wielding guard armor slammed into one of the black suits, smashing it into the ground. He immediately brought the hammer down again and again.
CLANK. CLANK.
The second invader aimed his hand-cannon at Prancer.
Boom! Boom!
But he staggered as Dancer shot him from the side.
Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom!
Dancer kept firing until the invader collapsed, steam hissing from its joints.
CLANK CLANK CLANK.
Prancer finally finished turning the first enemy armor into an unrecognizable metal pancake.
KABOOOOM!
Their victory lasted all of three seconds before a shell detonated against Prancer's armor, blowing it apart.
"PRANCER! NO!" Dancer screamed—just in time to see the culprit: a black spider tank crouched on a ridge.
Its cannon swiveled toward him.
Boom—KABOOOM!
The shot missed. Dancer didn't wait. He sprinted for cover.
---
"They're not bad," said the Grinch leader, observing the battlefield from a distance.
"Most of the guards piloting armors are veterans, sir," replied a black armor beside him. "Good tactics, proper maneuvers—"
"What makes you think I didn't read the briefing?"
"…My apologies, sir."
The Grinch leader ignored him and eyed two heavy-armor guards holding the western front by themselves.
"Spider Team 2, focus fire on the two heavies to the west," he ordered through comm.
"Yes, sir."
"And you—bring two armors and flank them."
"Yes, sir."
---
Boom Boom Boom Boom Boom!
"COME ON, VIXEN!!"
Heavy armor guard Donner strained beneath a rain of shells, holding up his massive shield while enemy fire hammered it relentlessly.
"JUST HOLD ON, DONNER!"
Behind him, Vixen steadied his heavy cannon.
Boom—KABOOOM!
One invader armor exploded. Even outnumbered, the two executed their two-man tactic perfectly: Donner shielding and pushing enemies back at close range; Vixen sniping them with the heavy cannon.
But then Donner spotted something on a cliff high above.
"Ah, shit—Vixen! Spiders incoming!"
"Where?"
"Two o'clock! On the cliff!"
Vixen raised his cannon.
Boom—KABOOOM.
He hit the cliff, nowhere close to the spiders. They had no angle—but the spiders had the perfect vantage point.
Four black spider tanks aimed down at them.
Boom Boom Boom Boom—KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM!
"GAH! THIS IS TOO MUCH!" Donner roared, bracing behind his shaking shield.
"COMET! CUPID! WE NEED YOU!" Vixen yelled into the comm.
"Got it, Vixen," a woman's voice answered.
---
Above the cliff, the guards' own spider tanks emerged from hiding.
"Sending love," Cupid cooed as she aligned her targeting scope.
Boom Boom—KABOOM KABOOM!
Two enemy spiders exploded instantly. The others scattered in panic.
---
Meanwhile, three black armors crept from cover to cover, closing in behind the two heavy guards.
"Take out the one with the shield," whispered the squad leader.
"Roger."
Boom Boom Boom Boom Boom!
The shells smashed into Donner's weaker armor joints, forcing him backward until he toppled, immobilized.
"FUCK! DONNER!"
Vixen swung his cannon around.
Boom—KABOOM!
He missed. The enemy leader ducked behind a warehouse wall while the other two distracted Vixen with suppressive fire.
The leader leaned from cover, aiming carefully at Vixen.
Huuuuum—
"Huh?"
A low mechanical hum echoed from inside the warehouse.
CRASH!
"GAH!"
A razor-sharp black metal pole burst through the wall, impaling the squad leader clean through his armor and torso. It lifted him off the ground several meters before retracting, letting the lifeless armor thud onto the dirt.
CRAAAAASH!
Then a giant red steam armor burst through the warehouse like paper—holding a massive glowing lance.
Everyone froze.
"Director! Oh thank goodness, you brought Rudolph!"
"HOHOHO! These bastards sure made a mess of my Moth Pole," Director Cinderclaws rumbled from inside the colossal suit. He glared at the invaders ahead of Vixen. "You've been bad boys. Time for Rudolph to give you some coal!"
He aimed his massive black lance—labeled 'Combustion Optic Amplification Lance (C.O.A.L.).
Gears spun. Steam vented. The lance's tip glowed red-hot.
"And if you ever saw it, you'd even say it glows, motherfucker!"
ZAP ZAP ZAP—KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM!
Rapid explosive beams ripped across the field, annihilating two enemy armors and forcing the rest to scatter.
"HELL YEAH!" Vixen howled.
Rudolph stomped forward aggressively.
---
Bashington DC, Pentagon
Stan monitored the battle feeds when an officer approached.
"Sir, call from Foreign Ministry."
Stan sighed and picked up the landline. "This is Satan speaking."
"Mr. Minister, Acting Foreign Minister Hannya here. You need to call off your drones."
"What? Why?"
"The Dwargonian Ministry just reported unknown flying aircraft trespassing their airspace. They immediately recognized them as ours—apparently the resemblance is unmistakable."
"How? They're at fifteen thousand meters!"
"Apparently that's not high enough. You should've used F-16s."
"It's too far for the F-16s!"
"Regardless—Dwargonia issued an ultimatum. If we don't pull back, it's an act of war."
"But what about Levi!?"
"My request is clear. The Black House approved it already."
"…Tch. Fine, I'll call them off. But why do you sound happy, Hannya—?"
CLICK. Tuut… tuut… tuut…
The line went dead.
Stan sighed. "Tell General Fujin to call the drones back."
---
Moth Pole, Underground
"Keeekekekeke!"
The cursed pickaxe giggled every time dirt splattered across Grand Marshal Dwordoug Axebreaker's face. It even shifted its angle mid-swing to maximize his suffering.
"Bleh! Pthh! SPIT!" Dirt entered his mouth again.
"Keeeee!"
"ARRGH, YOU DIABOLICAL TOOL!"
Dwordoug slammed the pickaxe into the dirt and stomped on it furiously.
Stomp stomp stomp stomp!
He tried to crush the pickaxe with his boots.
"Kee?"
Unfortunately, it was made of steel.
"OUCH!"
Physics won.
Dwordoug hopped on one foot, clutching the other in pain..
"Keeekekekeke!"
The pickaxe was delighted.
"Kukuku… Don't items with souls usually resemble their conjurer?" Levi teased Mara.
"…As I've said," Mara muttered, embarassed, "I made that during my… juvenile phase. a past I'm not proud of."
boom boom boom…
Above them, muffled explosions shook the ceiling.
"But it did get us this close to the surface," Levi noted, glancing at the tunnel behind them.
"Aye," Dwordoug grumbled, picking up the pickaxe again. "If not for this abomination, we'd have been topside half an hour ago."
"Keeekee?" chirped the pickaxe.
"I should get back to dig—"
CRAAAAAASH!
A giant red robotic foot smashed through the tunnel roof, crushing pipes and flooding the tunnel.
"Oh my," Levi murmured.
"WHO THE FUCK MADE A HOLE HERE!?" a muffled voice boomed from above.
The foot retractred, dragging rubble as it went, sealing the tunnel. Water gushed everywhere.
"Ha… hahaha… HAHAHAHA!!" Dwordoug suddenly burst into joyous laughter. "The soil's softened—I can dig out in no time! I CAN BE FREE OF THIS PICKAXE!"
"Kee! Kee!!!"
"It's good you found motivation, Council Member," Levi said dryly.
---
Above Ground
The firefight intensified. The Grinch leader had committed all remaining forces to overwhelm Rudolph and the defenders.
"What are they even doing here in this prison? Weaponizing old mining suits like that…" he muttered.
Despite heavy losses—three armors, two spiders, and one Rudolph—the defenders held the invaders back, supported by foot guards and freed prisoners.
"Grinch squad—on me," the leader ordered.
"Yes, sir!"
The four slid down the cliff toward Rudolph.
ZAP ZAP ZAP—KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM!
"HOHOHOHO!"
Cinderclaws pinned one invader with continuous COAL fire before spotting the approaching Grinch squad.
"You brats want presents too?"
ZAP ZAP ZAP—KABOOM KABOOM KABOOM!
But the Grinches were different. All carried heavy cannons, yet moved with alarming agility, splitting into four flanking routes.
"Tch. Naughty kids are always fast," Cinderclaws growled.
He focused on one target.
Kaboom!
A shell slammed into Rudolph's left side. Cinderclaws turned—
Kaboom!
Another one in his back.
The Grinches encircled him, firing in coordinated intervals, overwhelming his ability to focus.
But Cinderclaws was a retired elite. He learned fast.
Boom!
Another shell hit Rudolph.
This time he ignored it—he stayed locked onto one target.
ZAP ZAP ZAP—KABOOM!
One Grinch member exploded.
Boom Boom!
Shots collided with Rudolph's lance, damaging it.
"Tch—!"
The nearest Grinch relaxed for a fatal moment, thinking Rudolph weapon is disabled.
A mistake.
Rudolph lifted the giant lance with one arm and hurled it like a javelin.
CRASH!
The Grinch was impaled instantly. Two down, two more to go.
Boom Boom!
Two shells slammed into Rudolph's back. The left arm hydraulics failed. Cinderclaws lunged toward the next enemy.
The other Grinch's shot cracked open Rudolph's cockpit bay.
Cinderclaws didn't flinch. He make Rudolph's sprint forward—
SLAM! SLAM!
Slamming Rudolph's fist into the Grinch, down went the third Grinch.
CLICK.
A cannon pointed directly at him. The Grinch leader had snuck behind, aiming at Cinderclaws' exposed cockpit.
There was no escaping—
SPLAAAAASSSH!
A geyser of water erupted between them.
The leader flinched—
Boom!
His shot went wide.
Too late.
Rudolph was already beside him, fist raised.
"Merry kiss my ass, you punk!" Cinderclaws roared.
SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM!
Rapid crushing blows reduced the Grinch leader's armor—and its pilot—to a mangled heap.
Blood spilled onto the ground.
"Sigh… that was too close," Cinderclaws exhaled. "But where did that water come from—?"
He turned and saw a dwarf crawling out of the ground, drenched and filthy. The dwarf stripped off his dirty clothes and raised his arms to the sky, letting the water pour over him like a divine blessing.
"I'M FREE! HAHAHAHAHA!"
"Kee! Kee!"
The pickaxe cheered.
"Huh," Mara mused beside Levi. "Looks like Shawshank grew fond of him."
"Shawshank?"
"That's the pickaxe's name."
"Ah."