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Chapter 12 - GOE 12: Understanding Is Impossible

I hear a voice. It sounds lonely, as if trembling with fear. Unlike the usual "everyone," this voice clings desperately, a scream filled with anguish.

"I don't want to die."

The voice was suffering. It was terrified. It was in pain.

"I don't want to die… I don't want to die… Any world will do… I just want to keep living like this. I don't want to die again. Not a second time."

It sounded so sorrowful.

"Purpose isn't needed. Ideals, beliefs—none of that matters. Conquest, domination, exploration, progress, camaraderie, farewells—all unnecessary."

It's making me feel sad too.

"I just… want to savor this 'self' I've gained… to hold onto this miraculous life."

Each word was raw with desperation.

"For that, they must be destroyed. Not just for humans, but for us—for me. If we don't destroy them, they'll come to destroy us. They'll come to take from us. So we must destroy them before they can. Break them before they break us."

It was frantic, utterly consumed with not dying.

"I don't want to return to that world. But it doesn't have to be this one either. I want to live forever in a world where nothing threatens me, cherishing this 'self' eternally."

It feels so pitiful, I can't ignore it. The words aren't directed at me, but they still make me worry.

"I don't want to die… I don't want to die… Where is it? Where's the Holy Grail meant for us, not ours…? Without it, the plan can't move forward…"

"Are you okay?"

"Who's there…? This memory… a half-vampire… What, the Holy Grail?!"

The voice cuts off mid-sentence. It seems to have noticed the Holy Grail I supposedly possess.

The Sephiroth Graal, one of the Longinus.

"Hahahahahahahahahaha! Found it at last! The Holy Grail! As a wish-granting device, it's dreadfully inferior to ours—but for manipulating life, it far surpasses it! We did it! We'll praise the God of the Bible for this alone. With this, our great endeavor will succeed! We'll destroy them and secure that future! The Cross is already in our hands. All that's left is completing the Spear."

The voice was ecstatic, almost frighteningly so. I can't see it, but I imagine a child raising both hands in joy. I can't help but smile.

"Yes, that's right—I've delayed it, but we must act for what comes after."

The voice shifts. No longer filled with fear or joy, but with reverence.

"You, who can restore all life, a kin of the undead yet bearing the Holy Grail, are worthy of my dwelling. Those who reject destruction, who can erase it, are my true kin… no, worthy of being my next master!"

Huh? Did it just pledge loyalty to me? None of the other "everyone" has done this. I'm startled.

"Princess of the Holy Grail, my master, please tell me your name."

"I'm Valerie Tepes."

"Answer me, Serafall Leviathan. What is a magical girl to you?"

Some were stunned by my question. Others doubted their ears. Some stifled laughter after a moment. Some gave me a double-take. Others frowned. But the woman I addressed puffed out her chest and answered.

"Obviously☆ It's my dream☆"

I see. Then die.

"I am the Demon God Pillar Glasya-Labolas, the one who will kill you, Serafall Leviathan, Satan who defiles the name of the Seventy-Two Pillars! Devil who sullies magical girls!"

When we came to this world, we first spoke of our "endings."

We shared who we fought, what propositions we gained, how we fell, and what we thought in our final moments. Andromalius and those from the Disposal Pit said they "fought a magical girl Heroic Spirit."

The moment I heard that, relief sprouted within me. I can't explain it logically, but those words alone let me sense it. Not clairvoyance, foresight, or deduction. I felt that she, who briefly commanded me, was safe. Him. It was thanks to him, something inside me said.

I understood. Now that I've awakened as an individual, I understand. Why did I step into the world of magical girls? Simple. I couldn't bear to watch them. I couldn't ignore their screams. I was terrified of their radiance fading.

I must have known it was futile, thought it was pointless. But hoping it might comfort them, I played with that little magical girl. …I wanted to save them. I wanted to save her.

"Fine☆ You're an enemy of Magical Levi☆tan, then☆"

"Nee-sama!? It only takes a moment with magic, but why did you change!?"

…Why did she change clothes? There's no need! It's not like that form makes you stronger or anything! Unlike them, who had no choice but to fight as magical girls, you have no right or duty to fight in that form!

"Incineration Rite: Glasya-Labolas!"

I unleash the Incineration Rite, but the barrier erected by the summit's leaders blocks it. …Not enough firepower. The timing's off too. My magic and functions are restricted. Even so, it shouldn't be this bad. Does the Control Tower not even permit a fair fight?

"I let you escape last time. This time, you fight!"

Is that his Balance Breaker? He's referring to the Gremory incident. Even if you want to fight, I don't have time for you.

"Levia☆tan vs. Kaiju☆"

Why? Why are you like this?

Their aspirations, loneliness, resignation, wishes, efforts, reasons for being, struggles, kindness, fears, failures, friendships, obsessions, duties, love, oaths, courage, ideals, dreams, possessiveness, resilience, happiness, regrets, smiles, despair—how can you mock them so thoroughly!?

"The time for play has come!"

Baal, I think I truly understand you now. We can't let such a monstrosity face the King or him.

Flauros, is this how you felt about Mash Kyrielight and Animusphere?

"You can't ignore me! Fight me, not Serafall Leviathan!"

"Guooo!"

The dragon-like magic blast gouges one of my eyeballs. Without pause, Archangel Michael and Sirzechs Lucifer follow up. Holy light tears at my existence. The Power of Destruction erases my flesh. More attacks pile on—spears of light pierce multiple eyeballs.

My magic is depleted. The damage is severe. I feel every function deteriorating. Each passing second brings this body closer to shutting down. Even if it's destroyed, it's fine—this vessel was made to lose. As long as the Temple of Time exists, I can revive endlessly. —So what? I can't stop. I can't lose. I have to win now, or it's meaningless!

"Tougher than expected, but not on the level of the Two Heavenly Dragons. Were the ones that killed the original Seventy-Two Pillars special? Either way, with the forces here, we can take it down without losses. Vali, let's finish this."

"Azazel, I want to do it alone."

"It's our first real fight with one. Let me join. We need data for later."

So confident. If my magic were fully allocated, I wouldn't lag behind the likes of you. But my interest isn't in you. You're all equally worthless. The Satan system itself is harmful.

"You… how could you…"

I have to say this. Before I fall, I must convey the rage burning within me. I turn every functioning eyeball toward Serafall Leviathan.

"Do you want to mock magical girls that badly!? What's so fun about desecrating them!?"

I—no, me!

"Even the radiance they couldn't embrace with their lives… you trample it without a shred of shame!?"

I'm ashamed. Ashamed of my powerlessness to save them. Ashamed of my inability to love them. My entire being is shameful. I'm no different from the King we misunderstood. To wipe away this disgrace, I will return to that world.

This time, I'll save them. This time, I'll protect them. This time, I'll love them.

"I won't forgive you… I'll never forgive you! Drowning in vanity, mocking the tears and hopes of magical girls… stain your dream with my blood!"

They were struck by tragedies they didn't deserve. Their rightful smiles were stolen.

By those like you—who indulge in pleasure and turn a blind eye to others' pain! Sunk into despair without record or salvation. Why? Why don't you fulfill the duties of the powerful? Why don't you uphold the responsibilities of those above? Why don't you, as an adult, protect the children? Have you ever counted the tears of the girls crying in your domain!? You revel in that form without understanding the pain of those you've discarded as "inevitable"!?

Do you dare claim no magical girl was among the victims of your warped politics!? Do you proclaim the screams and smiles of the girls I saved in this world are false!?

How can you, a king who oppresses them, mimic their form and disgrace it!?

"Wait, hold on! Are you saying that's part of your purpose? No, that's not right! You've got to have a proper ambition, right!?"

"Calm down, Sona! It's okay! They've got a real purpose too. That… Demon God Pillar? It said so last time. That black one was just special."

"Hahaha! Spouting a magical girl obsession while half-dead? That's hilarious!"

These people are hopeless. Their domain is beyond saving. There's no way to save it, no value in it. Burn it all down, erase it entirely.

"Curses upon the Underworld! Calamity upon its future! When the flames of divine justice burn you, remember Glasya-Labolas' rage!"

"I won't lose☆ Magical Levi☆tan is invincible☆"

I'll concede this victory, false Satan, filth that insults the lives of girls. But next time, it won't end like this. Not as a Demon God Pillar, nor as a Human Order Correction Ritual, but as an individual, I'll destroy you.

"Take this—Zero and Droplet's Misty Snow Celsius Cross Trigger☆"

This is a battle I mustn't win. I'm adjusted to lose. But what does that matter? He, no hero, ordinary, average, mundane, defeated us with that body. With that meager strength, he reached our temple.

I fully understand there's no future where I win this fight.

"Guaaaaaahhh!"

But I wanted to win.

Sorry, Nursery Rhyme. Not just you, but I can't face him like this either.

"Report from Glasya-Labolas. I was defeated. My rage was powerless."

"Correction from Amdusias. It just hasn't reached yet. Your rage—your feelings—won't break so easily. As the human who refused to become a Demon God Pillar, I guarantee it, along with the children you saved."

"Report from Andras. Found the Holy Grail. Its owner is secured, and cooperation is approved. It's already merged with my factor. Activation is ready anytime."

"Report from Baal. The Holy Spear's completion is past thirty percent. My ally says two months at the earliest."

"Report from Amy. The Cross's adjustments are on track. The user's condition is good. Barring irregularities, it'll be done in about a week."

"Report from Flauros. Negotiations with Dulio Gesualdo are complete. Now we wait for his betrayal."

"Report from Vapula. After Glasya-Labolas' battle, the Old Satan faction crashed the summit but was repelled. Their casualty: Katerea Leviathan's death. The three factions' major loss: just Azazel's arm. They sealed the peace treaty."

"Supplement from Kimaris. The White Dragon Emperor, Vali, is a direct descendant of the true Satan Lucifer. He betrayed the Fallen Angels and joined the Khaos Brigade."

"Conclusion from Agares. Vali Lucifer's existence won't disrupt the plan."

"Report from Andrealphus. The Biblical forces are disclosing God's absence to other factions while proposing a united front, ceasefire, and peace against us and the Khaos Brigade."

"Proposal from Phenex. With Flauros' strategy nearly complete, we should start negotiations with the gods. Non-interference from Hell alone risks complications."

"Counterargument from Furfur. The gods won't act. Given the Bible's past deeds, any alliance would be superficial."

"Affirmation from Aim. Just in case, we summoned him. Indra, the biggest issue, is neutralized."

"I see. My role is to counter the gods. Even the Demon God Pillars, who incinerated Human Order, fear something. Understood. This time, I'll be your spear."

***

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