KHANYISILE
We just arrived at court, I'm nervous, the kids are nervous, they don't know what to expect, but Luyanda was very good with them yesterday when we were preparing them for today. Zwelibanzi is here already and I see Sizwe is also here today. Luyanda sees us and walks up to us and greets and shows us to our respective seats. The kids are sitting with me except for Khaya and Lina, who are sitting with the guys with Lina sitting between Khaya and Qhawe and I'm sure she feels like a Princess right now. My kids love attention.
Baillif: All rise (we all stand and Judge Adkins walks in. I wonder what Luyanda had to do to get him back into the country. I must ask him.)
Judge: You may be seated. (the case is re-introduce again after that is done, judge spoke.)
Judge Adkins: Yesterday I heard everything I needed to hear from the lawyers. As I said, today I want to hear what the kids have to say but before I speak to the kids, I want to ask the father a few questions. Mr Zwelibanzi Tom please stand.
Tell me Mr Tom, how is your relationship with your kids?
Zwelibanzi: at the moment it is very rocky since I haven't seen or spoken to them in four years.
Judge: Why is that?
Zwelibanzi: When Miss Sondlo left, I didn't know where she went and she changed her number and I couldn't get a hold of her.
Judge: Why do you think she is a bad mother?
Zwelibanzi: Because she kept them away from me for four years, no good mother can do that, keep the children away from their father for no reason.
Judge: Mmhhhh I see. You may sit.
(I don't understand what the judge is trying to do by asking Zwelibanzi all these question but we'll see.)
Judge: Mr Langa, are the kids ready?
Luyanda: Yes Your honour they are ready.
Judge: I want to start with youngest.
Luyanda: Yes Your Honour. Lwanele please come forward. (She looks at me and I just smile at her and she looks at Qhawe, who nods and smiles for her. Luyanda takes her hand and walks her up to the witness stand. Luyanda explains to her why she has to put her hand on the bible and everything else and she nods in understanding.)
Judge: Hi there Princess, can you please tell us your name and how old you are. (she smiles and looks at him)
Lwanele: I'm Lwanele Sondlo and I'm 12 years old. Judge can I ask you to do something for me. (Ok we are all surprised, what could she possibly want the judge to do for her.)
Judge: Ok, Princess Lwanele, what would you like me to do for you?
Lwanele: Can you please not call me Princess, only my dad's, my siblings and mom call me princess.
(That was very unexpected, we all just laughed. This child and she is like this, she doesn't want anyone else calling her Princess except us. The Judge is shocked and I don't think he knows what to say to her right now.)
Judge: I hear you Lwanele, I see your siblings, tell me, how many dads do you have?
Lwanele: I have six dads Sir. 3 recently joined our family and the other 3 have always been there for us for as long as I can I remember.
Judge: Can you point them out to? (she nods and points to where the guys are sitting.)
Lwanele: and sixth one is Bhut' Luyanda.
Judge: So if I become friends with your dads, would I be allowed to call you Princess?
Lwanele: Only if you are nice to them, my mom and us.
Judge: May the dads please stand. ( They guys smiling at their Princess.) may I have your permission just for today to call her Princess? (The guys look at her and she nods)
Qhawe: You have our permission Your Honour.
Judge: Thank you, you may be seated. So tell me Princess Lwanele, would you like to live with your father and also tell me why you didn't count him as one of your dads.
Lwanele: My mom never really wants to talk about what happened between her and our father. We haven't seen him in 4 years and mom told us why she left even though she doesn't like talking about it but she had to tell us. I'm the youngest and people always think that I'm too young to understand anything but my mom always gave me the benefit of the doubt. My father has never taken the time to get to know me, the time to make me his princess, I don't even know if he ever loved or loves me, I've never had a father daughter relationship with him, he never even attended any of my father daughter events at my school, I wouldn't want to live with someone who doesn't care about me and what I want. I wouldn't want to live with him because of the hurtful things he would say to us and to mom, it seems like we were never important to him. (my baby starts crying and Qhawe stands and asks for the Judges permission to go to her and the judge agrees. Qhawe takes his princess and tries to calm her and I'm also standing next to them and brushing her back but my baby is so hurt she can't stop crying. The judge is watching all this and looks at Zwelibanzi then back to us)
Judge: it's fine you can go sit with her. Mr Langa, bring the next child.
Luyanda: Ntando come. (he does the same thing he did with Lwanele explaining everything.)
Judge: and you young man, can you tell us your name and your age
Ntando: I'm ntando and 15 years old.
Judge: Can you answer the same question I asked your sister.
Ntando: Yes Sir I can. I wouldn't want to live with my father because even when we lived with him, we were not happy, he abused all of us emotionally. The things he would say to us, to mom, very hurtful things. I know I wouldn't want to be in that environment. I don't remember seeing him at any of my rugby games or going to the doctor with him. I don't even remember playing games or being a normal family. He was never home and when he was home, home would be hell.
Judge: Thank you Ntando. The 6 gentlemen that your sister says are her dads, do you also consider them your dads as well?
Ntando: yes Sir I do. They are the best.
Judge: You may step down young man, thank you and now I'm going to speak to your brother.
(Luyanda does what he needs to do with my son as he takes the stand)
Judge: Hello young man, tell me your name and your age.
Lonwabo: I'm Lonwabo Sondlo and I'm 17. I don't want to live with my father for the same reasons that my siblings mentioned. Living with him would be hell on earth like it was back then. Even if your ruling would be for us to go live with him, we wouldn't. there is a lot that happened in that house and mom thinks we don't know. We know that he would beat her and she tried hard to cry silently so that we don't hear her cry or wake us. (Lonwabo looks at me with tears in his eyes) Mom I know he would force himself on you after he comes back from his trips, I would hear you begging him not to. I know you didn't tell anyone because you were protecting us. (I look at Zwellibanzi and I know this is the last thing he expected to happen and he looks livid.)
Judge: Wipe your tears young man, I know it's painful but a man doesn't cry. (As the judge says that Qhawe and Khaya stand and Lonwabo shakes his head no and It is so hard not let my tears fall. I didn't know they knew so much.)
Lonwabo: that's where you are wrong Sir. A man should cry, he is allowed to. crying doesn't make him weak, crying makes him human. My mom taught me that. I'm 17 years old and because of my mom, I know that I am 10 times the man my father should be. (he steps down from the witness stands and comes to me and hugs me tight and my tears just fall. I hear the Judge saying court is adjourned until 14:00
ZWELIBANZI
I know I've lost this case. I've always thought there would be a chance to make things right, as long as no one knew what was happening behind closed doors but now, these kids know what I did. Lonwabo tells his mom he needs to be alone for a minute and he walks out followed by his little brother. After a few minutes I get up and follow them and find them standing against the wall outside at the far corner of the building and I walk to them.
Me: boys
Them: hi
Me: can I talk to you?
Lonwabo: we don't really have anything to talk about.
Me: We have lots to talk about. But right now, I want to apologise to you guys for mistreating you and your mom. I really don't have an excuse, for doing the things I did, I also don't know why I did them. I didn'k know you guys knew.
Ntando: look Zwelibanzi, just drop this whole thing, because we would never willingly go live with you.
Lonwabo: Whatever your plans are, you won't succeed. (I see Qhawe coming to us. Ntando just goes to him and hugs him)
Qhawe: are you guys ok, are you ready to go. We are grabbing something to eat then come back here.
Me: I'm still having a conversation with my kids.
Lonwabo: We are more of his kids than we ever were your kids. Ntando come on lets go, I can't stand being here. (with that said they walk away leaving me with Qhawe.
Qhawe: Stay away from them, otherwise I'll make you regret the day your mother ever opened her legs for your father and created you.
Me: I won't let you take my family from me.
Qhawe: they were never yours to begin with. But I'll tell you one thing though, it's a good thing you screwed up and I got to have them in my life. (with that said he walks away.}
QHAWELOMZI
We just had lunch and we are on our way back to court. I can't believe what I heard in court, I can't believe the things Lonwabo said, the pain my woman suffered at the hands of that man, the pain my kids suffered because of that man and he has the nerve to want them back. When we get to court I park the car everyone gets out but I stay and ask Lonwabo and Ntando to stay behind as well.
Lonwabo: is everything ok?
Me: I should be asking you guys that question.
Ntando: I'm not ok, I just want this whole thing to be over and we can go back to our lives.
Me: Why didn't you tell your mom that you knew what was going on?
Ntando: because she probably had her reasons for not telling us, she told us but she didn't tell us everything.
Lonwabo: Mom had a lot to deal with and she didn't need to worry about us knowing too much and besides, she took us for therapy, we still go to therapy but not as often as we used to when we started out. Bhut' Qhawe, I know that you didn't know about t the things I said in there and I'm sorry you had to find out like that. Mom suffered all kinds of abuse at the hands of my father and we won't be the ones to tell you. When she is ready to talk, she will. The only reason we know is because whenever our father was not home, we used to sleep with mom in her bed. And when he was back, before we go to bed, we would go to their room to check on her, that's when we got to hear her begging him to stop hurting her, to stop beating her, we heard her silent cries and muffled screams, eventually we stopped going to their room when he was back and we just tried to be there for her like she was there for us even the grandparents don't know the whole story. She didn't tell anyone because she didn't want anyone feeling sorry for her.
Ntando: She also attended therapy with us, we all did, even Lina and Khaya. Him and Khaya don't get along at all, because Khaya would stand up to him. He never did anything to mom or us when Khaya was around. He hates Khaya.
(as we were still talking there was a knock on the window and it was Luyanda, telling us it was time to go in. We didn't waste time, we went inside with him, Khanyi was waiting for us at the door.)
Khanyi: hey guys are you ok?
Me: We are ok baby, I just wanted to have a little conversation with them.
Khanyi: Ok then. Let's go sit guys.
In a few minutes the judge walked in.
JUDGE ADKINS
Before we went to our lunch break, I saw a lot of pain in a lot people in this room. Some looked shocked at the things Lonwabo said, some were crying, what I want to know now is if everyone is at least calm now.
Luyanda: Yes Your Honour we are fine.
Judge Adkins: before I pass my judgement, it says here Miss Sondlo has 5 kids, where are the other two kids.
Luyanda: they are here Your Honour.
Judge Adkins: May they please stand. (they stand) Now tell me, did you also stay with your parents?
Linamandla: he is not our father Sir, we have a different father but to answer your question, I stayed with them for two years and then my mom said I should go stay with my grandparents and my brother, she said it was for my own protection.
Judge Adkins: After you left, did you visit over school holidays
Khaya: yes we did but I eventually stopped visiting after we had a few altercations about how he was treating mom and my siblings.
Judge Adkins: did he hit you
Lina: No he didn't but we knew he was doing it to mom, with us it was just hurtful words, hurtful things he would say.
Judge Adkins: thank you, you may sit. Mr Langa has your client provided therapy for these children?
Luyanda: Yes Your Honour she has. It's been 4 years now but now the sessions are not as often as when they started out.
Judge Adkins: how many sessions do they have now?
Luyanda: One session a month Your Honour.
Juddge Adkins: After today, they all need to have two sessions a week for the next two months, this court case must have stirred up a whole lot of issues.
Luyanda: that will be arranged Your Honour
Judge Adkins: Mr Tom, you have guts, if I should say so myself. You sue for full custody of the kids knowing full well what you did, did you really think that you would win or were you just tormenting her wanting to watch her squirm at your threats. You are a disgrace, I wish she had gotten you arrested but then again from what I've read in your file you probably you would have bought your way out. You claim to want to do right by them but ever since you sat in my court room you haven't shown any kind of remorse for what you did to your family, I haven't seen any emotion from you showing that you actually want to fix things. You weren't even moved when your kids cried in this court room.
My ruling: the said children are all under the age of 18 meaning that they are still minors. They are to remain under the care of their mother as they have been. As for the father, since you said you wanted to do right by these kids, which I doubt but I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I know you will shoot yourself in the foot, you will get visitation rights. You are only allowed to visit them under supervision, you will only be allowed to see them once a week and I repeat, you will only have supervised visits. I will appoint a social worker that will monitor the visits. Princess Lwanele said that they have six dads, I appoint one of the new members of the family Lwazi Tiya to be present during these visits. I chose him because he's the only one that looks like he doesn't want to kill you and because he's the fun one, he'll be able to lighten the mood during these visits.
Miss Sondlo you have wonderful kids and you are doing a good job raising them and the things you are teaching your kids at this young age, I wish I had taught them to my kids at a younger age. You have beautiful, strong young women and handsome strong young men who love you very much and I can see how much you love them. I'm allowing their father visitation rights so that they don't grow up blaming you or blaming themselves for his absence in their lives, I'm doing this so that they can find a way to forgive and heal and have closure. You all won't be able to heal completely until you forgive, it will take time but at some point you will have to do it, which I'm sure that you have taught them about forgiving and being able to move on. I hope you understand my reasoning behind the visitation rights. And Mr Tom, I truly hope they forgive you not for your sake but for their own sanity.
Princess Lwanele I hope I'll get an invitation for lunch some time. (she looks at me smiling and nods.)
Court is adjourned.
QHAWELOMZI
Lwazi is so excited and I know he is going to make those visits for Zwelibanzhi hell . We are all happy the judge chose Lwazi, he is the most calm out of all of us. After court we all went to Khanyi's house, we ordered in and just relaxed. Even the kids seem to be more relaxed now but they are not happy with the visits but they understand why the judge had to do it. Khanyi is still hurt that the kids heard everything that was happening to her. We really need to do something about Zwelibanzi with the information we have, but we need something that links him directly to these activities, because with everything that we have on him right now, he is indirectly involved. Lonwabo interrupts my thoughts:
Lonwabo: You really shouldn't sit alone like this, she is worried about you and she is scared, you need to talk to her. (I know he is talking about his mother.)
Me: I will speak to her, when everyone is gone, I just wanted to absorb everything that happened today.
Lonwabo: I'm really sorry about how you found out.
Me: it's ok man. Can I ask you something?
Lonwabo: What do you want to know?
Me: did you mean what you said, when we were in court, when I went to get you from your father. You said I was more of a father to you than he ever will be, how do you know I'm better than him? I've only known you guys for a very short time.
Lonwabo: I just know. I just have a good feeling about you. You are the first guy mom has introduced us to since our father, which means that she trusts you and she is not forcing you to spend time with us, you are doing it on your own and you probably haven't told her anything about the "man to man" conversations we have and you never came here and demanded respect from us you earned it, you are earning it. Just don't hurt us, we've been through a lot especially mom. Also know that we would never intentionally hurt you.
Me: I hear you man. I would never intentionally hurt you either. Here comes your mom.
Khanyi: Hey guys, why so serious?
Lonwabo: just having a "man to man" conversation that's all. (and he laughs)
Khanyi: already, that's nice.
Me: it is, I feel so welcomed
Lonwabo: Let me go to the other kids. Catch you later love birds.
Me: Thanks man. (and he walks away.)
Khanyi: I miss you.
Me: I'm here my Star
Khanyi: I'm your Star now, I'm moving up. (she laughs) I still miss you.
Me: Of cause you are my Star, and I'm right here nje, how do you miss someone who is next to you
Khanyi: you know what I mean.
Me: No I don't, explain to me.
Khanyi: you know what I mean. Mxm. (I hold her close to me and whisper in her ear)
Me: What did I say about using "mxm" when you talk to me?
Khanyi: Not to use it.
Me: Then why are you using it?
Khanyi: Because you are irritating me, acting like you don't know what I mean when I say I miss you. Mxm.
Me: Khanyi. (she gets up moves away from me and she says "mxm" again) you are going to pay for that Khanyisile. ( I say getting up to move close to her and she moves back and says it again and she runs to the kitchen with me chasing her and she's busy calling for Eddie. When she gets to the kitchen she runs and hides behind Eddie laughing.)
Eddie: And now what's going on, why are we running in the house, behaving like kids?
Khanyi: it's Qhawe (The guys just laugh at us. I love how childish she's being right now.)
Me: Khanyi you do know that Eddie is leaving, in fact everyone is leaving, they won't be here to save you.
Khanyi: I know but Lwazi is staying (she says that moving to Lwazi who was next to Eddie.)
Eddie: Khanyi what did you do? You are so childish.
Khanyi: I said something I shouldn't have said. (the guys break into laughter)
Bandile: You are getting it tonight. Wait you are trusting Lwazi to save you from Qhawe. Let me tell you now, Lwazi will throw you into the lion's den (she looks at Lwazi shocked and he just shrugs his shoulders. Everyone is just laughing at her and she moves to Bandile avoiding me.)
Khanyi: can't you stay then? (she asks Bandile and he gets up grabs his phone and car keys.)
Bandile: bye guys.
Khanyi: Huh Bandile, just like that.