Chapter 67: We're All Buddies—Why Be Polite? Eat the Sausage
Xiao Wu and Zhu Zhuqing both passed the test one after another. Naturally, Tang San had no issues either.
With talent like theirs, they were geniuses no matter where they went.
When Su Yan stepped forward, Li Yusong's expression became noticeably serious.
He didn't doubt Dai Mubai's words—
But he did doubt Su Yan's age based on his appearance.
Then—
His pupils widened, and his expression twisted into shock.
"How is this possible…? All of you are around the same age…"
After speaking, Li Yusong quickly bent down to check the bone structure in Su Yan's legs again. Confirming his earlier assessment, his face grew even more complicated.
Which family released this ancestral monster into the world? Had the Seven Treasure Glazed Tile Sect's foundations grown this terrifying?
Standing nearby, Tang San maintained a calm expression—but deep inside, a storm was raging.
Damn it.
Su Yan, that guy, was clearly a useless piece of trash before! Now he had somehow become an unbelievable genius that defied logic. How? Why?!
Martial soul mutation?
When was his Blue Silver Grass going to mutate?!
Dai Mubai was dumbfounded as well.
No way.
This bastard was actually the same age as Zhu Zhuqing?!
Li Yusong turned and asked Dai Mubai, "Are you sure his soul power is really one level higher than yours?"
Dai Mubai, irritated but helpless, nodded.
Look at him—wrapped in bandages. Obviously, he wouldn't lie about something like this.
Li Yusong stared deeply at Su Yan, then said to the group, "Alright, follow Mubai inside."
Su Yan didn't say anything. The group walked forward behind Dai Mubai.
However—
When Dai Mubai casually glanced back, he noticed Zhu Zhuqing holding Su Yan's arm.
That was fine—they had made everything clear yesterday.
Zhu Zhuqing getting a boyfriend was completely normal.
But—
Another girl was also holding onto Su Yan's arm?!
---
Inside Shrek Academy
Before they even reached the next testing spot, a sausage pushcart rolled toward them.
Oscar was hustling for customers.
"Selling sausages! Fresh sausages!"
"Oscar Brand Sausages—delicious and fragrant! Cheap and plentiful! Only five copper coins each! Eat an Oscar sausage, and you'll definitely pass the entrance exam!"
Su Yan looked at Oscar and couldn't help sighing internally.
Douluo Dalu really developed early.
Take Oscar—he wasn't even old yet, but he already looked old.
Oh, right.
Since he was here, wasn't it time to "arrange" something for Tang San?
Su Yan stepped forward and casually handed over a gold soul coin.
"My friend woke up late and hasn't had breakfast. Give him everything and let him eat freely."
"Ah—yes, yes! No problem at all!"
Oscar stared at the gold soul coin, ecstatic.
He had opened the business for the day.
He was making big money.
This brother was not only handsome but also generous. Buying food for his friend—so considerate.
This brother was perfect!
Oscar waved excitedly at Tang San.
"Junior, come eat! Eat as much as you want!"
Tang San pointed at himself, stunned.
He looked at Su Yan in disbelief.
"Me?"
"You're treating me to sausage?"
What?
Did the sun rise from the west today?
Su Yan replied with absolute seriousness:
"We're all buddies—why be polite?"
"Eat the sausage!"
"There may be physical tests later. You need something in your stomach, right?"
Xiao Wu looked confused.
Su Yan cared about Tang San?
Since when were Su Yan and Tang San on friendly terms??
Ning Rongrong and Zhu Zhuqing exchanged doubtful glances. They didn't know the full history between Su Yan and Tang San, but judging from how Su Yan talked to Tang San in the chat group, this definitely wasn't normal friendliness.
Dai Mubai stood nearby. He was originally going to warn Tang San, but after seeing Oscar's pleading eyes—and remembering that Tang San and Su Yan were on the same side—he shut his mouth.
Whatever.
None of you are good people anyway.
Eat first, suffer later!
Tang San felt uneasy.
Why was Su Yan suddenly so… kind?
But okay…
Seeing Su Yan acting so friendly, Tang San decided he would postpone Su Yan's execution date by another two days.
Tang San didn't suspect Su Yan of trying to harm him. If Su Yan wanted to target him, he wouldn't need such complicated setups— and the sausage vendor in Shrek wasn't someone either of them knew.
Tang San took a bite of the sausage and smiled.
"Tastes pretty good. Uncle, why are you selling sausages inside the academy?"
"Uncle?"
Oscar froze.
"Brother, I'm fourteen. And you're calling me uncle?"
"Uh?"
Tang San was stunned.
He looked Oscar up and down.
If Oscar said he was forty, Tang San would believe it without hesitation.
Xiao Wu and the others were dumbfounded.
Good lord.
Shrek Academy really was full of monsters.
Su Yan watched Tang San finish two sausages and said seriously,
"Hey, friend, give my buddy a hot one to eat, yeah?"
Tang San: You're actually kind of nice??
Oscar's expression instantly turned awkward.
"Uh… no need, right?"
"Hurry up!"
Su Yan snapped, "I paid you a gold soul coin—how can you not give my buddy a freshly made one?"
Tang San nodded heavily.
Su Yan… Su Yan… Since you're being so sincere today, I'll postpone your execution by another week.
"…Alright!"
Oscar had no choice.
The customer was king.
He looked left and right, swallowed, then activated his soul skill and chanted in a low, sleazy voice:
"Your daddy has—"
A big sausage.
"Uh…???"
Tang San's expression froze instantly.
It was like lightning struck him on the spot.
Freshly made?
Your daddy has—
WTF?!
"UURGH!!!"
Tang San bolted to the side and vomited violently.
"HAHAHAHA!"
Ning Rongrong and Xiao Wu finally understood.
Zhu Zhuqing almost burst out laughing too—but when she glanced at Su Yan, she suddenly remembered something and her face instantly turned red.
"Zhuqing…"
Ning Rongrong was about to share her joy with Zhu Zhuqing—
But then she saw Zhu Zhuqing blushing.
Wait.
Why are you blushing??
Hold on.
A terrible realization dawned on Ning Rongrong.
She froze.
Then—
Woo woo woo—!!
This damn Zhu Zhuqing— she had already made the first move in the real sense.
"Su Yan!"
After vomiting for a while, Tang San glared at Su Yan with righteous fury.
Su Yan put on a look of shock and turned to Oscar.
"You—sausage seller—why are you so inappropriate?!"
"Look at my buddy! You made him so disgusted he's puking!"
"Is your sausage even safe to eat?!"
Oscar quickly raised his hand.
"No problem!"
"My sausages are absolutely safe!"
Then he hurriedly explained:
"I have no choice. Food-type martial souls require specific chants to activate effects. This line is just the soul-incantation, not something I want to say. My sausages are definitely clean!"
Su Yan nodded, then turned solemnly to Tang San.
"Don't worry, Tang San. Since he said it's safe—if anything happens, I'll personally cut off his sausage for you to eat—I mean—to avenge you."
Oscar immediately squeezed his legs tightly together.
Tang San trembled with rage.
"Damn it!"
"Su Yan, you bastard! You did this on purpose, didn't you?!"
This bastard Su Yan— he definitely deserved death.
And he, Tang San, would no longer postpone Su Yan's execution.
Su Yan glared right back.
"What the hell, we're buddies! I bought you sausages, and you're doubting me?"
"Unbelievable! If you keep acting like this, I'll get mad! We won't even be buddies anymore!"
Tang San: ???
—
End of Chapter