"Ilay! Did you watch it?!"
A boy groans from under his blanket."Hugh…"
The other voice — loud, too excited for 7AM — keeps going:
"No?? BRO WHY. WHYYY didn't you watch the new Chinese anime To Be Hero X? It's PEAK!!"
Under the blanket, Ilay thinks, Here we go again…
The loud friend yanks the blanket away, revealing Ilay, 18, messy hair, dead expression, in yesterday's school uniform like he never bothered to change.
Friend: "Finally! Rise, my disciple!"Ilay: "…I hate you."Friend: "you should also watch lord of mysteries it PEAK "
Ilay drags himself up. His school badge hangs half-torn, stitched with the name: ILAY.
He checks the time.School in ten minutes. Fantastic.
They rush out.
Friend: "Bro, imagine getting isekai'd—"Ilay: "Anime is cringe."Friend: "May your bloodline rot."
At school, Ilay does what he does best — sits, breathes, and participates as little as humanly possible.
Lunch arrives. The friend pulls him to the courtyard.
Friend: "You gotta see this vending machine. New sodas dropped!"Ilay: "They should drop plumbing first."
The vending machine sparkles like it's sponsored by the heavens.A sticker reads:KICK ME FOR BONUS.
Ilay stares."…This is how dumb people die."
Friend: "For the plot, bro."
Ilay gives it the softest kick.
Machine:BEEP — CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!
"…Huh?"
The machine screams like it's powering a nuke.A can fires out at light-speed, smacking Ilay in the forehead.He rag-dolls into a bush.
Darkness.
Ilay (fading): "Killed by soda… peak cringe…"
Ilay floats in a white void.
A glowing being appears — majestic, holy aura…
Being: "Yo. My bad. Machine's still in beta."
Ilay: "…You sound way too calm for someone who just watched me die."
Being: "Bro, relax. I've done this before."
Ilay squints. "How many times?"
The being thinks."…Like… 30? Mostly trucks. One guy slipped on a banana peel. Tragic arc. Even I laughed."
Ilay stares. "…You're terrible at your job."
Being: "Nah, I'm efficient. I reincarnate, I compensate, boom—next customer."
Ilay pinches his nose."So you're basically a celestial call-center employee."
Being: "Without the salary."
Ilay: "I didn't even LIKE anime. It's cringe."
The being shrugs."Good. You'll be fun then."
Ilay's eye twitches."I refuse to live in some generic power fantasy."
Being: "Cool story. Anyway—SPIN THE REINCARNATION WHEEL!"
A giant roulette appears. Options include:
Dragon Prince
Demon Lord's Pet
Overworked Villager #3
Sentient Potato
Overpowered Transfer Student With Zero Motivation
Ilay: "…Please not the potato. I'd rather die again."
The being flicks the wheel.
Click… click… click…
It lands on: overpowered transfer student with zero motivation
ilay: "That… actually fits my brand."
Being: "Yeah but… that was the wrong wheel."
A portal opens under Ilay.
Being: "Welp. Good luck bro!"
Ilay: "I swear if I end up in an anime—"
Being: "You do."
Ilay: "I hate everything."
He gets yeeted.
Ilay crash-lands face-first into a fantasy classroom.
Everyone stares.
Teacher adjusts glasses:"State your name."
Ilay lifts his head, dead inside.
"…Ilay."