The chocolate carefully wrapped in a pink satin box that Kurokawa Akane had sent was currently lying quietly in Michiya Gōshin's private rest room.
It seemed to carry the girl's fervent body warmth, reminding him of those feelings he could not avoid.
However, the gears of the entertainment industry never stopped turning for the ripples of personal emotions.
After a brief rest, the crew of We Made a Beautiful Bouquet began to operate efficiently once again.
The upcoming scenes were the key turning point where the movie shifted from sweetness to reality—the male and female leads, Yamane Mugi and Hachiya Kinu, began their cohabitation life, only to be gradually eroded by cold reality. Between the intimate lovers who once had endless things to talk about, rifts that were difficult to bridge began to appear.
The apartment interior built within the studio was filled with the traces of a young couple living together.
Posters of niche movies they both liked were pasted on the walls; the bookshelf was a mix of literary novels and manga; a game console and vinyl records were piled in the corner, silently recounting the spiritual resonance they had once been so proud of.
However, a sense of repression bred by differences in life philosophies had quietly begun to permeate the corners of this narrow space.
"Scene forty-two, take one, Action!"
The clapperboard rang out crisply. Michiya Gōshin quickly gathered his mind, clearing away the distracting thoughts in his head. He slightly hunched his back, letting his shoulders sag naturally. His entire aura instantly became heavy and weary, perfectly immersing into the world of Yamane Mugi.
At this moment, Yamane Mugi had just finished another day of futile job hunting.
He was wearing a crumpled black suit, his tie loosely pulled open, his face carrying a lingering fatigue and the accumulated frustration of being rejected time and time again.
Pushing open that familiar apartment door, what entered his view was Hachiya Kinu (played by Kurokawa Akane), sitting cross-legged on the tatami mats, wearing large headphones, staring with full concentration at the TV screen, her fingers manipulating the game controller intensely.
The gorgeous, jumping light and shadows on the screen flickered on her still excited and focused face, forming a cruel contrast with the cold silence and travel-worn dust of the Tokyo dusk brought in from outside the door.
"I'm home."
Michiya Gōshin's voice sounded low and hoarse, as if polished by sandpaper, carrying a thick weariness.
"Ah! Mugi-kun! Welcome home. Wait for me a bit longer, just a little bit more, this Boss's HP bar is about to bottom out!"
Kurokawa Akane didn't turn her head, all her attention condensed on the battle in the virtual world. Her tone was excitement unadulterated by any impurities, as if her lover's return and all the pressures of the outside world had nothing to do with her happiness at this moment.
In the next moment, the camera keenly pushed in, giving Michiya Gōshin an extremely detailed facial close-up.
Within just a few seconds, his eyes completed a series of subtle and complex layer transitions—from the trace of faint warmth and the peace of mind of returning to the nest that instinctively swept through the bottom of his eyes the moment he pushed open the door and saw his lover, to the stagnation and imperceptible disappointment the instant he realized the other party was completely immersed in her own world with scant reaction to his return.
Then, as his gaze swept over the uncleaned instant noodle cups, scattered snack wrappers, and several game cartridges on the small dining table, his brows subconsciously furrowed slightly, leaking a trace of helplessness and irritability.
Finally, all these surging emotions were covered by a deeper fatigue and loneliness.
Michiya Gōshin did not naturally lean over to hug his lover from behind as he would have during the honeymoon phase. He simply took off that suit jacket, which symbolized his struggles and failures of the day, silently and with somewhat sluggish movements, like unloading a heavy suit of armor.
Then he walked straight to the cramped kitchen, poured himself a large glass of cold water, and drank it all in one gulp.
The cold liquid slid down his throat, temporarily suppressing the stifling sensation in his heart and some unspeakable grievance.
Throughout the entire process, he did not make another sound.
And this deliberately maintained silence formed a sharp and cruel contrast with the intense game sound effects coming from Hachiya Kinu's side. This silent accusation and sense of distance possessed more tension than any fierce quarrel, highlighting the trajectory of the two people's spiritual worlds accelerating away from each other even more.
Behind the monitor, Director Doi rested his chin on his crossed hands, his eyes focused. He nodded slightly, whispering to the assistant director beside him, his voice carrying undisguised appreciation.
"Michiya-kun grasped the details of this segment too precisely. From the changes in his eyes to the sense of exhaustion in his body language, he completely expressed that numbness and loneliness of Yamane Mugi where even the desire to confide and share is gradually lost after being crushed by the weight of reality. This kind of restrained performance allows the audience to empathize even more."
The following few scenes carved this sense of drifting apart while "sharing the same bed but dreaming different dreams" even deeper, layer by layer.
The next scene was at night, with the two squeezed next to the small dining table eating.
Spread out in front of Michiya Gōshin were various recruitment magazines and several printed job postings. He shoveled the food in his bowl with his chopsticks without tasting it, his brows locked tight. He used a pen to circle and mark the magazines, sighing lightly from time to time because of the harsh requirements of a certain position or conditions he didn't meet.
Meanwhile, Kurokawa Akane attempted to break the dullness, sharing with him in high spirits an obscure European art film she had just watched today, talking about the charming use of long takes inside it and philosophical discussions about existentialism. Her eyes were sparkling, expecting to receive resonance and discussion from her lover.
"Kinu-chan."
Michiya Gōshin finally raised his head, interrupting her ceaseless narration. His voice carried an irritability and powerlessness that leaked out despite his efforts to suppress it.
"I have another interview tomorrow morning. It's over in the industrial zone in Chiba. I need to transfer trains three times. The earliest train leaves at 5:30, so I have to leave the house at 6:00."
In the next second, Kurokawa Akane's words came to an abrupt halt, as if her throat had been choked by an invisible hand.
She blinked those large, clear eyes. The light of excitement on her face dimmed rapidly, replaced by a confusion after being interrupted, as well as a trace of imperceptible grievance and embarrassment.
"...Oh, is that so," she responded in a small voice. Her voice dropped, carrying a bit of bewilderment. "Then do your best. Be careful on the way."
"Mm."
Michiya Gōshin squeezed a short and dull syllable from his throat, almost without any emotion, and lowered his head again. His gaze stuck once more to those densely packed recruitment information, as if that world composed of salaries, benefits, and overtime conditions was the only reality he needed to face at this moment.
The atmosphere at the dining table instantly dropped to freezing point, leaving only the slight sounds of bowls and chopsticks colliding and the invisible barrier between the two.
Kurokawa Akane interpreted Hachiya Kinu's loss and slight sense of injury after her chest full of enthusiasm and desire to share hit an invisible wall with extreme infectiousness.
She pursed her lips slightly, lowered her head, and poked unconsciously at the rice in her bowl with her chopsticks. Her eyes, which had been radiant just a moment ago, were now somewhat dim and unfocused. Yet she didn't try to speak again, just chewing quietly, as if even the taste of the food had become bland.
This scene likewise garnered praise from everyone.
Although the story of We Made a Beautiful Bouquet didn't have massive conflicts, many details needed to be polished carefully.
Michiya Gōshin precisely grasped the struggle and helplessness in Yamane Mugi's heart.
He didn't not love Hachiya Kinu; precisely because he loved her deeply, because he longed to give them both a stable and reliable future, he had to force himself to "mature" quickly, abandoning those hobbies and fantasies they had once indulged in together and viewed as spiritual pillars, to throw himself into the cruel competition for survival.
His silence, as well as the irritability he occasionally revealed unconsciously, was a fatigue from being powerless to maintain romance under the heavy pressure of reality, and also a protective color chosen to bear it himself for fear of making the other party worry.
And Kurokawa Akane brought to life Hachiya Kinu's incomprehension, grievance, and gradually accumulating disappointment. She still deeply loved that Yamane Mugi who could talk with her all night about literature and movies, share strange trivia, and had light in his eyes. Yet she watched helplessly as his edge and enthusiasm were ground away by the grit of life, feeling that beautiful, strongly resonating spiritual world drifting away from her. And she was powerless to retrieve it, able only to watch the colors of love fade bit by bit.
"Cut! Very good! This take is passed!"
Director Doi called cut with satisfaction, revealing the most relaxed smile of the day on his face, even taking the lead to clap gently.
"Kurokawa-san, Michiya-kun, good work! Keep this state, and the second half of our movie will be brilliant."
Michiya Gōshin and Kurokawa Akane heaved a sigh of relief almost simultaneously. The two subconsciously looked at each other, and both saw in each other's eyes the fatigue, complexity, and struggle belonging to the characters that hadn't completely dispersed yet, as well as a trace of relief and prostration after completing a high-difficulty performance.
***
By evening, the day's filming tasks finally ended.
Removing the makeup belonging to the character and changing back into his own comfortable casual clothes, Michiya Gōshin felt a deep weariness from the inside out.
This wasn't just physical exhaustion, but more so the psychological load brought by being immersed for a long time in Yamane Mugi's state of being squeezed by reality and filled with inner struggle, loneliness, and powerlessness. It was as if a portion of his soul's weight had been drawn away.
Returning to the rest room, he found that Kurokawa Akane had also followed him in silently and casually closed the door gently, temporarily isolating the clamor and prying eyes of the outside world.
Only the two of them were left in the rest room.
"Today's scenes... felt so heavy. My heart feels stuffy. What about you, Yu-kun?"
Kurokawa Akane spoke first. She sat down beside Michiya Gōshin and leaned her head directly over, resting it against his shoulder.
"Yeah. After all, it's the key stage where the story trends toward reality. Contradictions and estrangement need to be clearly established. The emotional consumption is quite large."
"Yu-kun, I actually have a concept I want to tell you about now."
Kurokawa Akane raised her head and looked at Michiya Gōshin, her eyes gradually regaining their clarity.
"Yamane Mugi-san is actually not a bad person. It could even be said he is a very responsible, very serious man. He just chose to face reality. After all, life can't be supported just by spiritual sustenance like hobbies and games. Daily necessities, a stable job, and an economic foundation are the root of survival, the responsibilities adults cannot escape."
Michiya Gōshin nodded, adding:
"The original intention of the script is indeed so. Yamane Mugi's choice is, to some extent, a manifestation of 'maturity' forced by societal meaning. It's just that this rapid and even somewhat cruel 'maturity' produced a fundamental deviation from the love model expected by Hachiya Kinu, which could stay forever on the level of spiritual resonance and shared interests."
"And..."
Kurokawa Akane furrowed her delicate brows slightly. Analyzing characters was an actor's basic skill; one had to analyze not only one's own role but also the character playing opposite.
"The reason Hachiya Kinu could maintain that attachment to the spiritual world and that innocence for a relatively long time... to some extent, it's also because her original family background is a bit better off than Yamane Mugi's, right?"
"She doesn't need to worry immediately about the next meal or next month's rent. She can have more leeway and confidence to guard the utopia in her heart and delay facing the cruelty of reality. This is the unbridgeable chasm between them, and also the truth that ultimately leads to them being unable to continue despite loving each other..."
Speaking to the end, Kurokawa Akane's voice took on a trace of faint regret. Her gaze fell on Michiya Gōshin's face again.
"Speaking of which, Yu-kun, since you wrote this script, do you... have relevant experiences?"
Michiya Gōshin was slightly stunned upon hearing this, then the corners of his lips curled up into a bitter smile carrying a bit of helplessness and self-mockery.
"In fact, I haven't formally been in a relationship." He paused, then continued, "It's just that I did have days where I lacked money, so I have a bit of resonance."
"Creating scripts doesn't require one to source completely from life experiences, so don't let your imagination run wild~"
"Mm."
Kurokawa Akane's voice unconsciously softened. She had already expressed her thoughts to Michiya Gōshin last time, and now, with the advancement of the movie's plot, these sentiments had long become even clearer.
"However, there is still a big difference between Yu-kun and me compared to Hachiya Kinu and Yamane Mugi," the girl smiled, staring with burning eyes at the person she liked. "If we could be together, I wouldn't make things difficult for Yu-kun. I would be very well-behaved."
"Akane..."
"Alright, I've said it many times already. I always feel that saying words of confession too much will seem too desperate," Kurokawa Akane paused again. "I will leave enough time for you to think about it properly."
"Mm."
After Kurokawa Akane left, the rest room returned to a quiet state.
Michiya Gōshin rubbed his temples and began to slowly organize his thoughts.
To be fair, he certainly had a favorable impression of Kurokawa Akane.
She was beautiful, hardworking, talented, and had a sincere and cute personality. In the days spent together morning and night on the crew, her company and gentleness had not failed to leave traces in his heart.
Facing such an outstanding girl who was inclined toward him, and such a sincere and brave confession, saying there was no heart-fluttering or touching feeling at all would be deceiving himself.
But this favorable impression, this heart-fluttering feeling, seemed to lack a crucial something before Michiya Gōshin could nod without hesitation and formally accept her fervent confession to become lovers.
Was it a confirmation regarding whether their soul essences were compatible?
Or the immense responsibility one needed to bear after starting an intimate relationship?
He couldn't sort it out himself either.
He only knew that feelings should be pure and firm. If he hastily agreed to her in this state where he couldn't completely determine his own mind, carrying hesitation and half-heartedness, it would be a great disrespect and unfairness to her pure and brave feelings.
Feelings shouldn't stem merely from being moved, appreciation, or a momentary impulse.
Just then, the door to the rest room was knocked gently, followed by a click as it was pushed open. Kato Megumi's figure appeared in the doorway.
She was still wearing that simple and elegant long coat, a light gray scarf draped loosely around her neck, her face wearing her consistent calm expression.
The girl was holding a not-too-large, simply packaged courier box in her hand.
"Sorry to disturb you."
After walking into the room, Kato Megumi saw Michiya Gōshin lying on the chair. Having been together morning and night for so long, she could keenly perceive that the other party was likely pondering some difficult problem again.
"Kato. What's up?"
Seeing the girl walk over, Michiya Gōshin let out a long breath, the expression on his face returning to calm.
In the next moment, Kato Megumi handed over the courier envelope, speaking in a flat, business-like tone. "Michiya-san, a courier just received. The sender is Miss Asakura Toru. It seems to be chocolate."
"Oh."
Michiya Gōshin took the courier box. Inside was indeed an exquisitely packaged chocolate box. The style was different from Kurokawa Akane's pink and Kato Megumi's blue simplicity, leaning more towards fashionable minimalism.
Attached to it was a card with Asakura Toru's handwriting, reading: [Thank you for your care, Michiya-kun. Happy Valentine's Day.]
Asakura Toru's group was about to hold a live concert soon. She had absolutely no time these past few days; being able to send a portion of chocolate over was already very earnest.
Michiya Gōshin also received a text message from Asakura Toru on his phone, feeling somewhat moved.
It seemed that for White Day next month, he would have to return the favor properly.
He placed the chocolate aside and took out his phone to quickly reply to Asakura Toru with a few messages expressing thanks and greetings.
After resting a while longer, the crew wrapped up work. Michiya Gōshin and Kato Megumi got into the company's nanny van together, preparing to return to the apartment.
In the car, Michiya Gōshin thought of that problem from just now again. Looking at Kato Megumi beside him who always appeared extremely calm, a very magical thought actually popped up in his heart.
"Um... Kato, have you ever been in a relationship?"
"Hmm?"
Kato Megumi turned her head, her pretty face carrying a trace of extremely faint doubt, and a trace of inexplicable significance.
"I haven't been in a relationship. Why does Michiya-san ask this?"
Michiya Gōshin hesitated for a moment, but finally decided to find someone to chat with. After all, Kato Megumi was closest to him, and as an artist assistant, he trusted her very much.
"Uh, because I have a question related to romance and want to ask for your opinion..."
"That doesn't matter. Although I haven't been in a relationship, I can be Michiya-san's listener."
Kato Megumi's eyes, which seemed capable of reflecting the emotions at the bottom of one's heart, were very clear. After Michiya Gōshin said this sentence, she immediately guessed what the problem was, so she nodded, folded her hands, and assumed a standard posture of serious listening.
"Michiya-san, please speak."
"Okay."
Michiya Gōshin took a deep breath and began to organize his language.
He didn't mention Kurokawa Akane's name, only recounting his mental journey, including the behaviors of two women and his own thoughts.
Humans are not grass or trees; who can be ruthless?
Michiya Gōshin briefly summarized his inner thoughts, as well as the contradictory psychology of having a favorable impression yet being unable to make up his mind to accept, along with various different types of concerns and deliberations.
Throughout the entire narration, Kato Megumi listened quietly without interjecting a single sentence, nor revealing any expressions of surprise, curiosity, or judgment. Her face remained in that waveless state, as if listening to something perfectly ordinary.
It wasn't until Michiya Gōshin finished speaking that he lowered his voice, his tone carrying a few points of self-mockery and confusion.
"Does my being unable to refuse crisply, yet also unable to accept calmly according to my heart... make me seem greedy? And also very indecisive, very unseemly?"
Kato Megumi didn't answer immediately.
She just tilted her head slightly, as if carefully digesting all the information in his words, or perhaps thinking about how to respond.
A moment later, she raised her eyes to look at Michiya Gōshin and spoke.
"Michiya-san, matters of feelings are actually not as complicated as outsiders imagine, nor do they need to be endowed with too much heavy meaning and entanglement."
"If you want, you can even proceed according to your own preferences."
"Proceed according to... my own preferences?"
Michiya Gōshin was slightly stunned.
"...Do you know of Dazai Osamu-san?"
________________________________________
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