Chapter 11
Maybe I Was Too Late.
I woke up knowing exactly what I had to do.
Today, I would tell Keifer the truth.
That I liked him.
That I loved him.
That I was sorry for every "no" I ever gave when deep down, my heart was already saying yes.
I had it all planned in my head.
I would pull him aside during break.
Look him in the eye.
Say it straight.
"Keifer, I—"
Except I didn't.
Break came and went.
So did lunch.
And last period.
I smiled at him in the hallway.
Laughed at one of Yuri's dumb jokes.
Felt the words on the tip of my tongue…
And swallowed them whole.
Why couldn't I say it?
Why was my heart thudding like it was scared?
By the time I got home, I was mad at myself.
Coward. Why are you always so scared to be happy?
I threw my bag on the bed and buried my face in my pillow.
Then my phone buzzed.
1 New Message
From: Ashlee 💫
"Jay… Keifer keeps calling me. He even came to my house just now. You need to talk to him."
My stomach dropped.
He went to her house?
Why?
What happened?
Was he trying to tell her something? Was he—
Was he giving up?
I stared at the screen for a long time.
Typed. Deleted. Typed again.
Finally:
"Okay. I'll talk to him."
But I didn't.
I couldn't.
I just lay there.
Blanket pulled to my chin.
Curtains shut.
Lights off.
And I cried.
Quietly.
Softly.
So no one in the house would hear.
Because what if I waited too long?
What if he gave up today?
What if someone else got to say yes while I was still holding on to my no's?
What if I ruined it?
That night, I held my pillow tight and whispered the words I was too afraid to say in daylight:
"I love you."
But no one heard it.
Not even him.
End of Chapter 11.
(Maybe I was too late…)