Hello, readers.
I am DEAD (I can't tell you my real name because of her), a typical ninth-grade student. Nothing distinguishes me—average grades, average appearance, and an extensive list of complaints. However, this isn't about my grades or detentions. It's about my entire life and one special person: the girl who changed everything for me without even trying.
This story began in seventh grade, during the final exam. I met her for the first time.
That morning, I woke up late; my alarm had been blaring for half an hour, but I ignored it as I always did. It was already 9:30 a.m., and I had finished getting ready and arrived at school. The assembly was underway, and I was certain the guard would yell at me again.t I got my way—a quick grin and a few excuses, and I was in.
I noticed her as I walked toward the line of latecomers.
She was only a few steps ahead of me, nervously adjusting her bag strap. She wore a red-and-black checkered shirt (school uniform) and a grey skirt, with her hair in a loose ponytail. The sunlight fell softly on her face, and for a brief moment, I forgot about the scolding I was about to receive from our principal.
She appeared simple—unlike the girls you see in movies or on Instagram. But she possessed a genuine quality. Something peaceful. Her glasses improved her intelligence, so she kept them on her nose. I'm not sure why, but I just love it.
Then she looked back.
Our gazes locked for a split second, maybe less. But that second felt like an hour, as if time had stopped specifically for me. My heart began racing too quickly, and I had no idea why. I'd never felt this way before in my life.
Oh, you don't know me yet, so I'll do my best not only to write about my failed love story but also to share my life journey of how a teenage boy left his country for 6 months to escape his depression, how he became a successful person, and how he eventually became a playboy who knows how to play and when someone tries to play with him*.
When I met her for the first time, what was my reaction?
All day, I couldn't stop thinking about her. During exams, while everyone else was concerned about question papers and grades, my mind was elsewhere, replaying that one moment when we made eye contact repeatedly. I had no idea she knew my name, but she was already etched in my memory.
And that's when I realized I was in love.
Not the movie kind, not the big romantic kind, but the innocent, silent kind of love that makes you smile at random moments for no reason. I did not want her to know. I didn't want to tell anyone else. I just wanted to keep that feeling, as if it were a little secret that only I knew.
That day, I promised myself that I'd never play with her emotions. I wouldn't rush into anything. I'd just... Love her quietly, from a distance, until I knew what I truly desired.
In the days that followed, I started seeing her everywhere. She walked with her friends, laughing softly and rapidly, like a tiny spark in the air. I started noticing everything, including where she sat and what song she hummed during lunch breaks. Every detail became a tiny treasure.
But I never mentioned anything.
I was just a boy who fell in love with a classmate who didn't know I existed. And that was sufficient for me back then.
Looking back, perhaps that is what made it so pure: the first feeling, before heartbreak and expectations. Love is simple and silent.
That was the day it all started: I met her for the first time.
So, how about you guys? Did you feel the same way?
— dead