September 20, 1980
A couple of days have gone by, and I don't know how the hell there have been so many events that occurred in a span of a few days. First thing to note, some guy started to go crazy. I was sitting at a lunch table by myself when I heard someone falling down the stairs. Then when I looked at the staircase, I saw a man on the floor, looked like he was 30, out cold. He wasn't breathing, wasn't crying in pain, not moving one part of his body. Just gone. Over the body, another man who was in his early 20s with the biggest grin and twitchy eyes started laughing. Although it wasn't a happy kind and more of just on the verge of breaking into tears. It was so damn loud, but everyone was quiet so that's why I wasn't easily able to drown it out like I usually do. A couple of guys came to pick up the body from the floor and one guy came to ask if the man was ok. Then the man started yelling and saying all these weird things like "Gun", "Blood", "Voices" stuff like that. I swear I also saw him try to swing on the guy, but the man missed and dropped to the floor and knocked out. He didn't die or anything, but he looked so pathetic that it was almost kind of upsetting seeing a human life be wasted in this shithole. I heard some of the guys behind me talk, I got little glances at both of them, there was a blond man next to a midget who I like to call Mr.Y and Mr. P.
"How could somebody take a life and fall asleep from it, like it was nothing. Does he have no brain?" Mr. Y said. Mr. P had this bored expression on his face and said
"The guy has killed a lot of people playing those games. Give him a break, if you see what he has seen, you'd break and do the same thing like him." I heard the blond man scoff and say
"Oh phooey, I'd be perfectly fine. Have you forgotten we've all done this at least once already?" The midget was drinking a glass of water.
"Not everyone…" he said, in a low tone, trying to be quiet when saying that, but I heard him loud and clear. I knew he was talking about me. It is true. For the past week I haven't been able to play the games yet which I'm actually pretty thankful for. I'm glad I'm not like these poor suckers. I felt their glares on me too, so to make them stop looking at me, I got up and walked away, not before giving them a glare myself, but that's all I did. I stood next to a wall that had a door that led to the yard. Standing there, I could not help, but listen in on other people's conversations. They were mostly talking about what happened with the crazy man and the dead guy on the floor. However my interest peaked when I heard that there were gonna be new people coming in. It was just a rumor so I never really believed it until the next day when new people actually came into the prison. I was kinda shocked, but considering they added me, I'm not surprised they'd add more, I went back to what I was doing and I just kept observing until I saw someone walking into my room. The man looked to be 20, although from how short he was and how he doesn't fit the societal human criteria of a man, it was kinda hard to tell. I only knew he was a boy because there are only men in this cell and I'm pretty sure that there is a place for women. But despite locking people up here, the person running this torture show had the heart to separate women and men so nobody gets any ideas. What a heart, right? Anyways the guy had brown eyes and black hair that was all fuzzy. His skin was a little darker than the rest of these guys, so my guess was Spanish. I'm not the person who'd care about looks, but to call this guy a man would be giving him too much credit. The way he looks, you'd expect him to be a woman.
"Hey, you should meet your new bunky." some guy said to me. He was next to me the whole time and I guess he knew I was judging and checking out this guy because he had an amused asshole smirk on him.
"Why would I do that?" I asked him.
"Because, you're gonna be in a room with this guy, that means you'll be around him a lot. Why not get to know him?" he said. I thought about it, and to be honest, the guy did have a point even though I wish he didn't. This poor soul could die quickly and I wouldn't have to talk to him, but if I have to be with someone, then I have to say something. I begrudgingly sighed and said "ok" so I could talk with the little shorty. As I walked though I couldn't help but hear what the man said behind me. He said something like
"Yeah and if he likes you, he might give you some head." Pervert. An absolute pervert. As I walked to my cell I couldn't help but feel worried in a way, not because I was scared to make a first impression, rather I was nervous for this new guy's first impression on me because if he's annoying, then I probably would have asked to be the next one up for the games. As I made it to the cell, I peaked my head in the room to see the guy sitting on the bottom bunk taking his stuff out. I took a breather before going in and stood near the entrance.
"Hey." I said, I don't usually start conversations. Some call it socially awkward and while that might be the case, I just never felt the need to talk to other people who weren't my mother and some of my family. The man raised his head, his stoic face immediately turned into one of relief. I guess the loneliness really started to get to him until I showed up. Although I can't blame him. In this place you only have yourself to trust. You never know when someone could be planning your demise here. I know multiple people planning other peoples' demise and I know there are some on me.
"Hey. I guess we are roommates?" he asked softly.
"Yeah I guess so." I said. The awkward silence was deafening, it was quite hard to make up something to talk about even though I could have talked about anything. The man cleared his throat and put his hands behind him.
"My name is Riley Gonzales. I was brought here because I needed some money for my family and I was told that if I won some games here I'd get it." he said.
I guess they also didn't tell him how many games and which game he has to play if he wants money. Basically, you have to play at least 10 games and you have to survive each one. As far as I know most of these guys don't make it past 5 or 6 if they're lucky enough to make it to 6. The game is called Russian Roulette. They added some rules to spice up the game. The way you play the game is like this: In the game, there is only one bullet in one of the six cylinder slots of the revolver. The person who has the gun can either spin the cylinder and either shoot themselves or shoot at the opponent. You keep going until the bullet eventually either kills you or your opponent where you basically either win or lose. I know this because I heard people explain the game to one of the newcomers while I was observing. As you could see this isn't a very fun game to play and if you're in this game for the money then chances are you're not gonna be able to get what you wanted. I came here because I was forced to. I had debt to pay and the landlord said that if I wanted to pay all of it, I had to play in this jail to do it. If I didn't I'd be homeless which honestly looking back at it now, it probably wouldn't have been a bad idea.
"Ah I see." I said to Riley. I looked him up and down before asking
"Hey uh, so why do you look like a girl?" It's an awkward question to ask, especially since I just met him, but it's not like anyone here would care either since they're only caring about themselves. He looked down at his body and chuckled,
"Oh yeah, I guess you can say I've got more features from my mom than my dad. Usually I'd dress up differently from this orange jumpsuit." I couldn't help but feel confused.
"Like what?" I asked. He pulled his collar on his shirt and gave a shy smile before saying
"I cross dress a lot. I don't have a manly body, so I just thought I'd have more fun dressing like a girl than a boy." he said. You know I have heard about those types of people before. However I only ever see them on the internet. I never thought I'd have someone like that in front of me.
"Hm, well you might want to watch out. Most of these guys haven't seen a woman in a while and you're the closest one to it so-" before I could finish that sentence, Riley spoke up,
"I'm aware of that. I'll stay guarded. I'll just stay with you then if that's the case." I was caught off guard and thought it was a joke, but with how serious his eyes looked, the joke was the truth.
"Why do you want to be around me? You just met me?" I asked. He crossed his arms and said,
"Because we are roommates, if neither one of us trusts each other, how will we be at peace in our room?" he said. I understood his reasoning, but I'm usually one to be on my own. I was just forced to be Riley's roommate. With little choice I had, I sighed and agreed on it. I didn't want to get into an argument as little as this. Although recently because of Riley I've had some company at my table. I did enjoy not having one though since it was much easier to listen in on other people's conversation than to have someone like Riley who likes to talk a lot. He also doesn't understand personal space and he sits a bit closer to me than I like him to. However, the pro about being a friend to him is that he shares his food with me. When I told him that I didn't have money, he took pity on me and shared some of his food with me, which I do appreciate. He's kind, but with how kind he is, I had wondered if he's just gonna be some sort of doormat to others. He told me he wouldn't do anything he doesn't want to, but I don't know if he's saying it to say it since I have seen him do things for the other guys too. He doesn't realize what these men are like. They're animals who, when given the chance to be near a woman or one that's close to them, would do terrible things that even make me uncomfy. We'll see how it goes from here. Although I have been hearing about some people starting the games tomorrow, so I'm just gonna hope it's not me. It's always random though, but I don't know, I feel like tomorrow something is gonna happen to me and I'm not ready for what's in store.