Rhodes rolled over and pulled Mira into his arms, smudging her lipstick as he whispered against her ear, "If you're not qualified, then there's no such thing as a qualified wife in this world."
Mira's smile bloomed sweetly, but only for a second before turning into a mock glare.
"My dress is all wrinkled now."
Rhodes sat up, already unbuttoning his shirt. "Doesn't matter. You won't be wearing it later anyway."
"We're changing into casual clothes, don't make it sound weird."
The way he said it, while taking his clothes off, was clearly deliberate.
Rhodes tossed aside his jacket and said innocently, "I said we're changing clothes. What's strange about that?"
Mira ignored him, methodically undoing the ties of her gown and slipping into her favorite black dress.
She moved with deliberate slowness, occasionally stealing "secret" glances at him, though she wasn't fooling anyone.
Rhodes watched his wife with a helpless smile. She really was a performer at heart, changing right in front of him with those graceful, tempting movements.
If he didn't have other things to do later, he would have definitely taken her up on the silent invitation.
After they both changed and freshened up, they opened the Hex Gate and returned to the guild.
The moment they arrived, Rhodes saw the gathered crowd and froze.
He threw up his hands dramatically. "Who are you people?! Give me back my companions!"
He'd gone out of his way to dress casually again, but everyone else was dressed to kill.
The girls looked stunning, the gowns suiting them perfectly, well, except for Cana, who looked like she'd lost a wrestling match with her dress.
But what really confused him were the men, his usually scruffy guildmates, suddenly looking so proper.
Mira smiled. "Didn't we agree this was going to be a casual banquet?"
Makarov folded his arms seriously. "Even if it's on our own territory, it's still a foreign noble's celebration. We must uphold Fairy Tail's image."
Rhodes squinted suspiciously at him. "Is that so?"
Max, never good at keeping secrets, leaned over. "Actually, Macao said that once we get there, he might have a fateful encounter with a young lady from a famous family."
Ah. There it is.
Rhodes sighed. "And… was Romeo there when he said that?"
Max didn't reply, just tilted his head toward Romeo.
The boy's face was a portrait of teenage despair: equal parts embarrassment, frustration, and "please don't talk about it."
"Forget it, forget it," Rhodes said, waving it off. "Let them wear whatever they want."
He clapped his hands. "Erza, is everyone accounted for? We're leaving."
Makarov puffed out his cheeks like he wanted to protest, 'Why don't you ask the Master?', but something told him he wouldn't like the answer, so he stayed quiet.
Erza nodded crisply. "I've confirmed the numbers. All ready."
"Good." Rhodes raised his voice so everyone could hear.
"Alright, everyone stand firm! I'm about to activate the magic. Those who get dizzy easily, close your eyes. Those who don't, do as you please."
Having learned from experience, Natsu, Gray, Lucy, and Wendy all obediently closed their eyes.
Erza, of course, didn't flinch.
Makarov, having also learned his lesson, shut his eyes without hesitation.
The rest, Levy, Romeo, Asuka, Evergreen, Elfman, and Lisanna, followed Rhode's instructions to varying degrees of obedience.Lisanna didn't even get the chance to choose, Mira gently covered her eyes herself.
The rest assumed nothing could go wrong and ignored the warning entirely.
Rhodes didn't bother reminding them again. He raised his hand, tracing a glowing blue line in the air. A vast magic circle unfolded, enveloping everyone in shimmering light.
In an instant, they were swept into subspace, weightless, moving faster than thought.
Moments later, they reappeared in the courtyard of the Duke's Mansion.
The light faded, and as soon as their feet touched solid ground, more than half of them dropped to their knees, groaning.
"Ughhh…" came the chorus of suffering.
Romeo, pale but steady, sighed in relief. "Lucky I listened to Brother Rhodes."
Asuka tilted her head. "What's wrong with everyone?"
Wendy, assuming her "big sister" tone, said proudly, "That's what happens when you don't listen, Asuka. You must never be like them."
Asuka nodded seriously. "Asuka is the best-behaved!"
Alzack, meanwhile, was being supported by Bisca, looking ready to throw up. He'd insisted on keeping his eyes open to "see how the spell worked."
Now he deeply regretted that decision.
Mira turned to Lisanna with concern. "How are you feeling?"
Lisanna's eyes sparkled. "That magic's amazing! Brother-in-law, can you take us around the world with it?"
Mira laughed softly. "There are… quite a few restrictions on it, actually."
"This is unacceptable!"
Erza stood with her hands on her hips, her voice sharp enough to make even the groaning stop for a second.
"Is this what a qualified Magician looks like?!"
"Ah ha ha ha! You guys are so useless!"
Natsu, though still dizzy, had already recovered enough to laugh at everyone else.
"You have the nerve to say that?" Lucy shot back.
Happy puffed out his chest. "Aye! Natsu has rich experience!"
Lucy gave an awkward laugh, remembering why he had that experience.
"That's… not really something to brag about, is it?"
Juvia, pale-faced and clinging to Gray, moaned dramatically,
"Gray-sama, this feeling...ugh....this is Juvia's love for you, uncontrollably overflowing...ugh…"
Lucy steadied her, exasperated. "You just wanted to see Gray's naked body and didn't close your eyes, did you?"
"Lu..ugh...rival!"
"Don't throw up while saying my name!" Lucy groaned.
Gray, catching one crucial word from the chaos, looked down and froze.
"Rhodes! Why didn't you bring my clothes with you?!"
"You!" Rhodes caught sight of Asuka nearby and barely stopped himself from swearing.
"Who knows where you took your clothes off? Try reflecting on yourself for once!"
It was a complete disaster.
Fairy Tail's first large-scale group teleportation looked more like a battlefield defeat than a grand arrival.
Rhodes sighed. 'I really need to train these guys…'
If there ever came a day when they had to use long-range troop deployment magic, they'd probably be wiped out on landing.
Amid the chaos, no one noticed Laxus.
For just a moment, his face twisted slightly, and his body swayed as if suppressing something unpleasant. But when he straightened, arms crossed and expression cold, he looked as composed and intimidating as ever.
A soft voice came from behind.
"Duke… may I ask…"
An elderly maid, dressed impeccably, approached Rhodes with visible hesitation.
"Are these… the 'guests' you mentioned?"
They had been briefed earlier that more guests would be arriving.Food and refreshments had already been prepared.
But these people...
They were rolling on the ground, yelling, arguing, half-undressed…
Surely the Duke's friends were supposed to be the graceful and refined dignitaries they'd entertained at noon?
The maid blinked in disbelief.
"Yes," Rhodes said cheerfully, completely unashamed.
"These are my friends, or rather, my family."
He pointed toward Asuka, who was giggling beside Wendy."See that little girl there? Apart from the children, you don't need to worry about anyone else."
"Yes, understood." The maid's professional instincts barely saved her from fainting.
She quietly made a note to warn the staff: Pay special attention to the small black-haired girl with the cowboy hat and the blue-haired child beside her.