Bai Hao — the little brother of "Freeloader Bai."
He grew up in the Feilu Orphanage, just another ordinary Genshin Impact player.
When he woke up that morning, he found himself transmigrated—right into the floating mountains of Jueyun Karst in Liyue!
At first, he thought the standard transmigration routine was about to begin:
a golden finger system, a Serenitea Pot, collecting beauties from the Seven Nations, marrying Klee, and ascending to the peak of life…
But alas—unfamiliar with this new world, he was immediately robbed by a band of Treasure Hoarders.
Then, a passing Shenhe beat those same Treasure Hoarders half to death—and robbed them right back for him.
After bowing in gratitude to his savior, "Wife Shenhe," Bai Hao gleefully pocketed the Mora looted from the robbers and left Jueyun Karst, heading toward the bustling Liyue Harbor.
He bought a couple of sets of local clothing, strolled the streets, and soaked in the foreign atmosphere to his heart's content…
By afternoon, he'd found his way to Wanmin Restaurant, ordering a full table of dishes!
And that was when it appeared—
the Teyvat Fan-Creation Livestream System!
Its function was simple: much like a void-type system, it could forcibly bind every living creature across all of Teyvat.
As the system's host, Bai Hao would harvest Emotional Energy Points whenever he caused emotional fluctuations among beings in the Seven Nations.
Those points could then be converted into Primogems.
Primogems, in turn, could be used to pull abilities or items from the Ultimate Skill Banner—
currently the only banner available.
The pool contained various ultimate moves from across worlds—alongside a handful of… utterly useless trinkets.
For instance, ultimates like Tensa Zangetsu, Infinity, Infinite Tsukuyomi, Mahābhairava Tantra, Merciless Sun, Meteor Swarm…
and junk like Railgun Coins or Ryūjin Jakka—most of which were trash-tier loot!
And so, Bai Hao eagerly activated the Teyvat Fan-Creation Livestream System.
The first "character" he chose to create content about—
of course, it was Mona!
After all, just last night, he'd passed out while watching a "Mona CV remix disco."
Who knows—maybe that's why he transmigrated in the first place!
Since her "voice actress" had killed him, it was only fair to "get revenge" on her daughter!
Bai Hao, after all, was a very petty man.
Sure, Mona's public embarrassment had been tragic…
But Bai Hao's situation was worse—
because he hadn't cleared his browser history, nor wiped the "mathematical research data" from his two 16TB hard drives!
Anyway—back to business.
Ever since the Teyvat Fan-Creation Livestream System went live, Bai Hao's Primogem count had skyRocketed like a Rocket.
Each person's contribution was based on their emotional response—
some gave little, some more, from a minimum of nearly zero to a maximum of one Primogem per day, refreshed daily.
[Jean's Thighs have offered you 0.69 Primogems!]
[Scaramouche has offered you 0.25 Primogems!]
[Zhongli has offered you 0.12 Primogems!]
[Raiden Ei has offered you 0.23 Primogems!]
[Xiangling has offered you 0.88 Primogems!]
[Venti has offered you 0.00001 Primogems!]
[Arataki Itto has offered you 0.114514 Primogems!]
When Bai Hao saw the last one, the corner of his eye twitched.
Tch—Venti, that sly bard, stingier than miHoYo itself!
At present, Bai Hao had over one hundred million Primogems saved up.
A single pull in the Ultimate Banner cost ten million—enough for one full ten-pull!
Speaking of ten-pulls… Bai Hao couldn't help recalling that woman.
Ziyin, the voice actress for Eula—who once, during a live stream, pulled three Eulas in a row and screamed,
"It's my first time!"
Bai Hao too was about to have his "first time"…
Ahem—not that kind of first time.
He meant it was the first time he'd ever seen a failed "Salary Reclamation Plan."
Poor Dawei Ge (miHoYo CEO) took a massive L that day!
To ensure a lucky start, Bai Hao planted two chopsticks upright in his rice bowl, pressed his palms together, and prayed solemnly:
"Oh great Lady Ziyin—Mother of Eula, Voice of Rosalyne, Liyue's Queen of Racing—
I pledge ten years of Dawei Hilichurl's lifespan to you!
Grant me the fortune of a true whale—a ten-pull, triple-gold miracle!"
At that instant, he felt as though Ziyin herself had descended upon him.
Confidence surged through him like a Pharaoh commanding the gods of gacha.
He pressed the button.
Whoosh—!
Ten shooting stars streaked across the system's screen.
He skipped the animation immediately—
and ten cards appeared before his eyes:
World of Battle Through the Heavens: Enhanced Qi Condensation Manual! (Instantly become a Dou Fighter without cultivation!)
League Universe: Yasuo's Signature Flute! (No paddles needed—my life is all about the wind!)
Geo Archon Morax's Ultimate: Heavenly Earthquake!
Morax's Divine Garb: Unmoving Profound Dark Robes!
Mushoku Tensei World: Roxy's Silent Water Magic Technique!
Liyue Qixing: Keqing's Black Stockings! (Freshly removed.)
Real World: A Super Deluxe Bathtub! (Comes with full toiletries.)
Artifact of the Lost Era: Kunwu—The Rainbow Severing Sword!
World of Sword Spirit Mountain: A single Xiaoyun Ancient Coin!
Healer's Restarted Life: Blu-ray Disc Edition!
"A divine sword, an ultimate skill, and a god-tier anime… triple gold in one ten-pull! Ziyin, you're a goddess!"
Bai Hao's eyes shone with wild joy.
Tsk, tsk—Lady Ziyin truly was the Empress of Luck! He had to absorb her aura someday!
And of course, he silently thanked Dawei Hilichurl for his generous sacrifice…
Losing ten years of his life?
Please—Hilichurls were immortal, weren't they?
By rounding logic, he'd lost nothing!
Maybe next time he'd offer a hundred years!
"…But seriously, what's with Keqing's stockings? And freshly removed at that?! Do I look like that kind of guy?"
He grumbled, stuffing the silky pair into his pocket anyway.
Then, he moved on to check his other spoils…