I have always believed that the early morning holds a special kind of magic. A sacred, silent period before the world wakes up where a man can find a sliver of peace. For me, that sliver of peace usually existed between 5:30 AM and 6:00 AM. It was just enough time to wake up, use the bathroom, and get the rice cooker going before the hurricane that was my sister, Ayumi, made landfall. It was a simple, cherished routine.
Today, however, my sacred time was violated.
I shuffled out of my room at 5:32 AM, my brain still half-asleep, and walked toward the main bathroom. A horrifying sound emanated from behind the closed door. It was a high-pitched, off-key, but undeniably enthusiastic singing voice belting out the chorus to what was probably a Crimson Rush B-side track. Steam was already seeping from under the door.
My peaceful morning was already dead. It had been murdered by my hyperactive cousin, Inoue.
I leaned my forehead against the cool wood of the door and sighed. It was the sigh of a man who had accepted his fate. My quiet life was a distant, fond memory, like a vacation I took years ago.
A few minutes later, another set of footsteps padded down the hall. Ayumi. Her eyes were still puffy with sleep, but they sharpened into daggers the moment she saw me standing by the occupied bathroom.
"Who's in there?" she whispered, her voice a low growl. "Who dares to use the bathroom before you, Onii-chan?"
"Inoue," I said flatly.
Ayumi's entire body tensed. "That- that invader! How dare she! And she's using all the hot water, I can feel it! My special lavender-scented bath bomb requires water of at least forty-two degrees Celsius to properly activate!"
I didn't have the energy to ask why she was taking a bath at five in the morning. "It's fine, Ayumi. I'll just wait."
But Ayumi was not one to wait. Her eyes darted around the hallway, a mischievous, calculating glint appearing within them. A terrible idea was being born in her mind; I could practically see the cartoon lightbulb appear over her head.
"You know, Onii-chan," she began, her tone a little too casual. "I think I've been hearing a weird buzzing sound from the fuse box lately. Maybe I should go check on it. Just to be safe, you know? It would be terrible if something... tripped."
She scurried off towards the utility closet before I could protest. I knew exactly what she was planning. It was a classic Ayumi sabotage attempt: create a problem and then conveniently blame it on faulty wiring. It was a dumb plan, but Ayumi's plans were never about sophistication. They were about passion.
A moment later, the entire house plunged into darkness. The singing from the bathroom stopped abruptly, replaced by a startled shriek. "Ehhh? What happened?!" Inoue yelped.
The silence that followed was immediately shattered by a different, far more terrifying shriek from Hina's room. "MY WI-FI! MY LIVESTREAM! I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF EXPLAINING THE SEVEN-STEP HYDRATION METHOD TO TWENTY-THOUSAND PEOPLE! I'LL BE RUINED!"
Ayumi reappeared in the hallway, illuminated only by the faint light of the rising sun through a window. She had a triumphant smirk on her face. "Oops," she said, feigning innocence. "Looks like a little power outage. How clumsy of me."
Her victory was short-lived. Hina burst out of her room, her face covered in some sort of green mask that made her look like a creature from a swamp. Her stylish purple hair was held back by a ridiculously expensive-looking silk headband.
"Ayumi!" she hissed, her voice trembling with restrained fury. "Did you touch the fuse box? My followers think I've been abducted by aliens! My brand deal with 'Sparkle Dew Skincare' is hanging by a thread!"
"It was an accident!" Ayumi insisted, though she couldn't quite hide her grin.
At that moment, the bathroom door creaked open. Inoue peeked out, wrapped in a fluffy towel, her orange hair dripping. "Did the power go out? I couldn't see anything! I almost used conditioner as a face wash!"
Just then, another door opened. Azuwa. She stood there, her long red hair perfectly brushed even though she had just woken up. She was holding a toothbrush and had an expression of cold annoyance. She took in the scene-me looking dead tired, Ayumi looking smug, Hina looking murderous, and Inoue looking confused-and her eyes narrowed.
"What is all this noise?" she asked, her voice calm but laced with steel. "Some of us are trying to maintain a proper sleep schedule for optimal vocal cord health." She looked at the dark hallway. "And why is the power out? I need my electric toothbrush. It oscillates at thirty-thousand vibrations per minute to ensure maximum plaque removal."
"Ask Ayumi," Hina grumbled, pointing an accusing, goop-covered finger.
Ayumi's smugness faltered under Azuwa's icy stare. "I-it was an accident," she stammered.
Azuwa wasn't buying it. She walked over to the utility closet, flipped the breakers with an air of practiced efficiency, and the house instantly hummed back to life. The lights flickered on, revealing the full absurdity of our pre-dawn standoff.
"There," Azuwa said, turning to face Ayumi. "Problem solved. Now, if you're all done with your little games, I need the bathroom. My morning routine takes precisely forty-seven minutes, and I am now behind schedule."
She tried to step past Inoue, but Ayumi blocked her path. "No way! I was here first! After Onii-chan, of course!"
"You forfeited your turn when you decided to play electrician," Azuwa shot back.
"I need to rinse my hair!" Inoue chirped, trying to squeeze between them.
The three of them were now in a tense, three-way standoff in front of the bathroom door, arguing about succession rights and the importance of their various beauty regimens. Hina was stomping back to her room, furiously typing on her phone, probably doing damage control with her followers.
I had been forgotten. All I wanted was to brush my teeth. The simple act of performing basic dental hygiene had become an impossible dream.
I turned around, walked back to the kitchen, and squeezed some toothpaste onto my brush. I leaned over the sink, turned on the tap, and began brushing my teeth using the cold, unforgiving kitchen faucet. The water tasted vaguely of dish soap.
Inoue, having apparently lost the bathroom battle, skipped into the kitchen a few minutes later, now fully dressed. She saw me spitting into the sink and her eyes widened. Then, she beamed.
"Oppa! You're already in the kitchen!" she exclaimed, rushing over and latching onto my arm. "Perfect! I was just thinking, could you make me a special breakfast? Maybe some kimchi jjigae? It reminds me of home! Please? You're the best cook!"
I stared at my reflection in the dark kitchen window. A tired-looking teenager with toothpaste foam on his chin and a hyperactive K-Pop idol attached to his arm. My sacred morning, my sliver of peace, was gone forever. And this was only the beginning.