Anne's POV
The days torturously urned into weeks, and the weeks weeks into months, and instead of getting better like I thought I would, I grew worse. I craved the comfort of Liam's touch.
In all honesty, I would had relegated the memories I had with to depths of my mind, but his calls and messages did nothing to help me, and before long, I began texting him again, and then, texting progressed into visits. He would visit late at nights when Shelley and Dustin would probably be sleeping. Even then, my little Shelley still caught us a few time, much to my disappointment.
"Who's that man I've been seeing, mom?" She had asked one night—like a grownup would—after Liam had left one night.
I was startled, not just by her question, but by the fact that she had been watching us quietly. I was completely overwhelmed by guilt. "A friend of your dad's who's been checking up on us." I lied.
"Then why...?" she was beginning to ask, and then she just fell silent. I knew she wasn't satisfied with the answer and was most likely going to ask why he came at night or why he didn't let them see him. I didn't try to explain any further, I had no explanation to give her at the moment. She was just too smart for her age, it was both satisfying and annoying.
I called Liam one day when he least expected and told him I was ready for the vacation. He was surprised and excited. After all, Marcus had had plans to take me on vacations before his unfortunate demise, so, I might as well do it now when I really needed a break, and I hoped he'd understand.
It was crazy how I made it seem like I was doing the right thing, even though the decision to leave was truly a betrayal, not just to his memory, but to the stability I'd started to build with Shelley and Dustin.
But how could I resist this? A luxurious resort in the South of France, that's what Liam had said. I couldn't wait to see the white sand beaches, the endless blue skies, and a small chance to forget my now almost never ending worries. I was sincerely long overdue for a vacation.
I stood in my bedroom, packing one of my suitcases while the kids slept down the hall. The red dress Marcus had bought lay folded on the bed. It stared at me, quietly accusing me of what I was planning to do. I couldn't bring myself to pack it, but I couldn't leave it behind either. In the end, I slipped it into one of the suitcases, burying it beneath the beautiful silk blouses and sundresses I had packed myself. Maybe in France, I could wear it without the crippling feeling of guilt that threatened to drown me.
***
"Mom?" Shelley's voice startled me. She stood in the doorway, her nightgown brushing her ankles, her eyes too perceptive for a ten-year-old. I didn't know if I should be proud or worried.
"Hey, sweetie," I said, forcing a smile. "Why aren't you asleep?"
"Are you leaving?" she asked, her gaze shifting from me to the suitcases. My heart sank, I hadn't known how to face either of them with the plan of my vacation. I walked to her and knelt in front of her, brushing a curl from her face.
"Just for a little while. Aunt May's going to stay with you and Dustin. I… I need some time to clear my head." I stuttered.
I caught her brow furrowing, and for a moment, she looked so much like Marcus, she was sharp, intuitive, always seeing through my half-truths.
"Is Liam going with you?"The question was so sudden it startled me. I hesitated, then I quickly recovered my composure and gave her a soft nod.
"Yes, honey. He's… a friend. He thinks a trip might help me feel better."
Shelley's lips pressed into a thin line, but just like before, she didn't argue. "Okay," she said quietly, then turned and padded back to her room.
After one of the nights where she had questioned me, I have had Liam introduce himself as a friend of Marcus, and she had never forget. In her eyes, I could tell she felt betrayed.
Her silence was worse than any protest she would have made. She knew more than she let on, and that knowledge ate away my heart.
***
The flight to Nice was a blur of champagne and Liam's easy charm. He sat beside me in first class, his hand resting lightly on mine, his voice a soothing balm against the the trouble that threatened to tear my heart in a thousand piece.
"You're going to love this place," he said, his beautiful eyes glinting with the promise of love and adventure. "The Côte d'Azur is magic. It'll make you forget everything."
I smiled hopefully, but the words almost had no meaning, I wondered how I was going to forget everything like he said.
We were booked into a nice suite, and after I unpacked, I took a nice long bath and fell right asleep to Liam's kisses.
The next morning, I woke to find Liam gone, his side of the bed cold. A note on the nightstand read, "I have an early meeting. Back soon. Enjoy the beach."
I frowned. Where could he possibly be heading to when we only just arrived? He had never mentioned meetings. I suspected he had gone for one of his mob meetings. But I waved the thoughts aside, slipped into a sundress and headed to the beach. The sand was warm beneath my feet, and the sun glinting off the turquoise waves. For a moment, I let myself breathe, and let the beauty of the Côte d'Azur wash over me.
My worries seemed to disappear in an instant. I was beginning to love this place, maybe it wasn't as bad as I thought after all.