After we had our fill of exploring the city, we decided to continue our journey. The horse-drawn carriage moved along the main city road until a large gate finally came into view; the exit from the city, the boundary between the inner and outer worlds that provided a sense of security for its inhabitants.
Our carriage finally passed through the gate. Beyond it, we were greeted by a vast plain covered in grass as far as the eye could see.
The color green dominated the view, and the scent of sun-drenched grass began to waft in through the carriage's ventilation slits. I stuck my head out the window, feeling the wind hit my face and blow through my hair; its aroma was fresh and warm.
The blades of grass, battered by the wind, moved as if dancing to a uniform rhythm and tune, creating a symphony of nostalgia that reminded me of my childhood.
The carriage moved swiftly along the road that cut through the vast meadow. The sound of the horse's hooves and the turning of the carriage wheels kicked up dust along the path it left behind.
The horse pulled the carriage so quickly that small impacts with the uneven road caused quite strong jolts.
"Brak!!!"
A loud thud was heard. I pulled my head back inside from the window and turned towards the source of the sound, which turned out to be my teacher who had fallen from her seat.
She must have been asleep, which caused her to fall when the carriage wheel hit an uneven patch of road or a rock.
"Teacher, are you alright?"
Aware of my attention, she immediately stood up as if she felt nothing, casually straightened her clothes, and sat back down in her place.
"I'm fine, I was just caught off guard—ow..."
Although there was a slight pause as she went to sit down again, she flinched for a moment before finally settling into an odd, seemingly uncomfortable position.
I was sure her backside must have hurt, and right now she was just putting on a brave face.
"Why don't you use magic, teacher?"
I understood the pain in her rear, having experienced the same thing before, but one thing I didn't understand was why she didn't use magic to soothe or heal the pain.
"What for?"
She was still pretending. Alright, it seemed I had to do something. I moved closer and sat beside her.
"Slaps!"
I touched her bottom with the palm of my hand.
"Ow... what are you doing? That hur..."
She stopped, her sentence unfinished. Even though it was obvious that she was in pain, she persisted in hiding it.
I looked her straight in the eye, silently saying, "Just admit it."
My teacher sighed, then her right hand came towards me and flicked my forehead with her middle finger.
"Fine, fine, my bottom does hurt... so what?"
"Why don't you use magic?"
I asked, and she stared back. Her hand reached out and, with a single pull, made my nose turn red.
"That hurts! Why did you do that?"
I yelled, clutching my red nose, which had been pulled quite hard. This was probably the first time my teacher had seriously tried to hurt me.
"See, you feel it, don't you?"
"Feel what!!!"
I turned my face away, unwilling to look at her, and covered my ears with both hands, not wanting to listen.
Suddenly, I felt a pull on my hands. Not only that, my whole body felt as if it was being pulled closer until it was pressed firmly against the carriage wall.
I couldn't move. My face was forced to look directly at my teacher's, while my hands felt bound, preventing me from using them to cover my ears.
"Listen carefully!" she said loudly, her tone demanding.
"Now, can you move?"
She asked, but I didn't want to answer. No matter what, I wasn't going to answer; that's what I thought.
Since I didn't respond to her question, she tried something else. Her hand clenched into a fist, and a punch came straight for my stomach. But in the end, the punch never landed; she stopped it just before it touched my clothes.
I couldn't believe she had tried to hit me while I was immobilized. Tears streamed down my face. I didn't know why; my chest felt tight. Even though her fist hadn't touched me, the feeling of being struck in the chest was incredibly painful. After that, my teacher stepped closer and hugged me.
"I don't use magic to heal my wounds, not because I can't."
"I don't want to refuse to feel, just like what you're feeling right now."
She said she didn't want to refuse the pain; instead, she wanted to experience it.
"Wounds and pain are lessons, and a sign that you are alive and feeling."
"You learn from them, you grow to become a stronger person."
She spoke at length by herself. In her embrace, I didn't care; I didn't want to hear her reasons.
"Brak!"
I pushed her, shoving her so hard she fell into a sitting position, causing the carriage to lose its balance for a moment.
She sat there silently, motionless, not even trying to get up. I stared at her. Her face was in shock, perhaps from surprise or because of her sore bottom, but I didn't care.
After that, I chose to lie down facing the wall, while my teacher remained still. Her head was bowed, her blonde hair—the same color as mine—covering her face.
The day began to darken. The journey became silent, with only the sound of the horse's hooves and the turning of the wheels echoing along the road until, suddenly, we stopped.
"Knock, knock!"
"Ladies, we've arrived at our destination."
The coachman's voice came as he knocked on the door, informing us that we had reached an inn. I turned over, only to see my teacher get up and turn back to face the wall.
She stood up; I heard her footsteps as she walked out. I was still conscious at that moment. A few minutes later, she returned, and my consciousness slowly began to fade.
———
Sunlight pierced through the window, stabbing through my eyelids. I woke up in a room, lying on a bed.
On top of my body, I saw an arm and a leg pinning down my chest and thigh. It was a familiar sight and feeling, one I had experienced before.
Beside me lay the figure of a blonde woman wearing only her undergarments, who was none other than my teacher. Her arms and legs were draped over me, using me as her body pillow.
Her face was close, but I didn't look at it or try to see it; some of her hair blocked my view.
I tried to shift her arm and leg, but my efforts were in vain as they moved right back up. But I didn't give up; I kept trying to get them off me, focusing on the same motions: pushing, pulling, or lifting with both hands.
Finally, my gaze shifted and met my teacher's face, who, it turned out, had been watching me all along. Now it was all clear why her leg and arm kept moving back; she was doing it consciously to play with me.
We stared at each other, our gazes locked. I saw a joyful smile on her face, which she didn't hide, as if nothing had happened between us.
"I can't... breathe."
She hugged me so tightly it made it hard for me to breathe. I didn't know what was wrong with her, or what had happened while I was asleep. Two things were for sure: my teacher was being weird, and of course, I was still very angry with her.
I struggled to break free from her embrace until, finally, a knock on the door was heard.
"Ma'am, a royal messenger has come to fetch you."
It was the coachman's voice from behind the room door. My teacher got out of bed, releasing her grip, and got dressed.
The door opened to reveal two men. One was wearing a black tuxedo, our coachman, while the other wore the magnificent plate armor typically worn by high-ranking knights.
"Tell him to come here," my teacher said. Her gaze was directed at the knight messenger. "Who needs whom," my teacher continued and then closed the door.
What was I feeling right now? My teacher was being so arrogant and proud, even refusing a royal invitation. She then sat on a chair facing me.
"Want to go out, have a look around?"
I didn't answer her. I got up from the bed, grabbed my bag of belongings, and walked out of the room.
Beyond it was a hallway connecting all the rooms in the inn. I walked from there to the veranda and then through the inn's main door.
Outside, I saw a smooth road made of paving stones covering the ground. On both sides, tall buildings stood.
Many people were passing by on the street, from young men and women to adults and the elderly; they were all in pairs.
At the far end of the street, I saw a large, magnificent castle. I figured, based on its size and splendor, that it must be the castle of this country's king—the center of all government.
I continued walking from the inn, exploring the nooks and crannies of the city, from the market and the town square park, until my adventure led me astray into a small alley. It was getting dark; I had to get back to the inn, I thought.
I walked on, entering the small alley. It was dark, musty, and the air was dirty and dusty. I had to get out of here quickly.
"So bright."
I said after finally getting out. Because it was now night, the lights illuminated the surroundings, and for me, who had been walking in the dark, it stung my eyes when I first came into contact with the light.
This is strange, why is it so bright, I thought. Even though it's nighttime, this feels excessive. I let my eyes adjust to the light and then realized I was in the pleasure district.
The tall buildings in front of me had balconies filled with couples being affectionate.
I could see young men with adult women, and vice versa, as if there were no boundaries for lovemaking here.
This place is dangerous, I have to get out of here as fast as possible, I thought. I also noticed that several people had been watching me.
I covered my eyes with both hands, but left a small crack to peek through. I ran down the street, which was decorated with twinkling lights and the moans of couples that... argh, I don't want to think about it.
I kept running, and finally, those who had been watching me revealed themselves; they were chasing me. I didn't know who they were or why they were chasing me, but I knew I had to escape.
Who knows what they would do to me if I got caught. I might be forced to... ah, forget it, hahaha, thinking about it will only distract me.
I kept running through the small alleys of the pleasure district until I didn't know where I was anymore; I was cornered.
"Ah, damn it, a dead end."
Choosing the wrong path had led me to a dead end. This is not good, I thought. My back was against a wall, facing three men who were slowly approaching.
I couldn't see their faces; they were covered by black masks that concealed their entire heads, leaving four holes in the front.
"You can't run anymore, little girl."
"Good girls should be obedient and not cause trouble."
Two of them spoke, trying to calm me down, though it had the opposite effect, making me even more scared.
"Stay away, don't come any closer, or else...!"
I held up my bag full of books, threatening to throw it at them if they dared to take another step, but it didn't work.
Just as they were trying to calm and tame me, my attempt to make them back off had the opposite effect.
Only a few centimeters remained between them and me. My legs were shaking. Even though I knew my effort was futile, my hand was still ready to strike with the book-filled bag.
"Wow... you smell so sweet, little girl, just like a grown woman."
"Slaps!"
One of them sniffed my body. My hand reflexively struck him with the bag.
"You filthy creatures, get away from my daughter!!!"
A familiar voice came from behind the three men, a voice I knew very well but felt slightly strange. I tried to look, and sure enough, that very familiar voice belonged to my teacher.
The three men turned to face my teacher and began to approach her.
"Here comes another one, and this one is... extraordinary."
"It makes sense, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. If the child is that beautiful, then the mother must be very beautiful."
"It's just that the fruit might need a little touch-up to become like the tree that bore it."
The three men said, commenting on how our faces were similar, yet different in some parts that might need touching up.
"It seems you all need some special attention," my teacher said.
"Hoho... feisty, ar—" one of the men spoke, but before he could finish his sentence, he vanished into thin air, leaving the other two looking confused.
My teacher looked at the remaining two. The two men stared back at her, and then they too vanished just like that. Huh, where did they go, I wondered. My teacher then walked towards me. I was confused, what should I say right now.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
I felt nervous, which was unusual for me. Could it be because of our earlier fight and the fact that she had just saved me?
"Of course, I'm fine, thank you."
She hugged me gently. It felt warm, exactly how a teacher would hug me, but there was a difference. I don't know why, but even though it felt comforting, like being hugged by someone I knew, I also felt a strangeness, as if there was no connection between us at all. Especially after she said, "my daughter."
What did she mean? I'm her daughter? A child, and she, my teacher, is my parent? The way she regarded me as her child already made me feel like something was wrong here.
Although it felt like something was off, I didn't think she was evil. And it reminded me of the figure of "The Wife" a few days ago. Could she be one of them?
Ah... this is nice, I thought. Is this what it feels like to have a mother? I returned her hug. Her scent was so fragrant, overpowering the musty smell that had previously dominated the dead-end alley, and her body was warm, making the cold of the night feel like just an illusion.
The hug lasted for quite a long time, so long that I forgot how much time had passed. Then she released her embrace and said:
"Do you want to nurse? Or a lullaby?"
This is what I hate most when dealing with adults; they treat me like a child, and I'm sick of it.
"No, I don't need that. I'm a grown-up, and thank you for everything."
"I have to go."
I realized it was time for me to leave; I couldn't stay here any longer, but before that.
"This is a gift from me."
I kissed her on the right cheek, then stood up and ran away. There was a tightness in my chest when I took my first step to distance myself, breaking free from her embrace.
I don't know why, but tears fell with every step I took, blurring my vision. The colorful lights from the dim lamps around me mixed my feelings into a chaotic mess. Should I go back? Or keep running?
———
In front of me was the inn. On the other side of the road, I saw a luxurious horse-drawn carriage parked; it wasn't the one I usually rode in. There was also a line of knights and several horses lined up.
I went inside. The inn's lobby was crowded with many lavishly dressed people standing around. They all looked at me, but no one said a word, and I didn't care either.
I reached the hallway and saw two knights standing right in front of my room door. What is this, who are they, I wondered. The two knights didn't block my way as I approached the door.
They stood still like statues. To make sure if they could actually move, I waved my hand right in the slit of one of the knight's helmets.
"Hm..."
He didn't respond; they were very stiff. I knocked on their armor, and it made quite a loud sound. Not only that, there was a sword hanging from their waists. I tried to pull one out but was stopped.
"This is not a toy, miss."
Said the knight, as he opened the door for me.
"Please, miss, come in."
Hmm… why so suddenly? They ignored me before, and now one of them is opening the door for me. Is it possible he's annoyed because I was disturbing his work?.
Alright, I went inside. Inside, I saw my teacher sitting on a chair. In front of her was a table, and across from it sat a man in magnificent clothes with something like a trap, the kind usually spread around the walls of a high-ranking person's residence to deter intruders.
They both turned their gaze towards me.
"Well, your problem has been solved by her."
My teacher said. She wasn't speaking to me but to the man in front of her, while referring to me.
The man was surprised, his eyes wide open. He rose from his chair and approached me.
"Is it true, miss?"
He asked, though I didn't know what he meant. All I did was stand there hesitating, before finally seeing my teacher give a signal. I nodded as my teacher gestured.
"Thank you, miss. As a father and also the king of this country, I am very grateful."
Heh… he's the king? Wait, what is he doing here, in an inn, in the room of a traveler like us? And was my reaction the right one?.
My teacher stood up from her chair and pulled me along.
"Your problem is solved, shoo… shoo… go away."
My teacher said with a sweeping motion of her hand; she was shooing away the king. I stared at her; how dare she dismiss a king like a mere acquaintance, I thought.
The king laughed at my teacher's behavior.
"Of course, I don't want to disturb you. Oh, and young lady, tell me, what would you like as a reward?"
The king asked me to make a request, but I was still confused. Why and what did I do to deserve a reward from a king?.
My teacher patted my shoulder. I didn't know what she meant. She probably wanted me to make a request quickly.
"Destroy the pleasure district."
I said. I had a little trouble with that place a while ago. This might be my form of revenge.
The king was a little surprised; I saw his expression turn a bit grim. Then, I heard the sound of someone's footsteps walking away from behind the room door. I think it was one of the knights.
"And please, decorate the narrow streets or small alleys throughout the city with bright, colorful lights."
I didn't just ask for one thing. Since this was from the king, I wasn't going to ask for something easy. And well, the small alley was where I met the gentle figure who looked like my teacher, and I want those places to no longer be dark, so that even people passing through can feel the same warmth I felt.
The king chuckled and said, "Of course, I will grant your wish," he said. "Because this may be the root of the problem I am currently facing." After that, he turned and left the room.
"How was your meeting with Mother?"
My teacher asked. She sat in the chair, pulled a cigarette from her pocket, lit it, and took a drag.
"Mother? Is this related to my reward?"
This might be related to the figure who saved me from the three perverted men in the narrow alley a while ago.
"Yes, they're both related. Sit down."
I sat down, and then she asked me to open the book to page 009, which read:
APPELLATION: The Absolute Mother
TITLE / EPITHET: The Cosmic Womb, The Unending Nurturer, The Golden Cage of Warmth
CLASSIFICATION:
* Primary: Mythological
* Status: Active
* Scale: Cosmic
* Tier: Abstract
ORIGINS: She is the first instinct made manifest. When the first life emerged in the universe and felt the fear of its own fragility, a pure desire to protect and care was born alongside it. This fundamental will to "cherish" was so potent that it coalesced into a single, vast consciousness. She is the embodiment of the absolute concept of motherly love, without the filter of logic or limitation.
FORM / ESSENCE: Her essence is Absolute Conceptual Nurturing. She is the principle of unconditional love and total protection made real. She possesses no fixed physical form, as her essence is the very act of "nurturing" itself.
APPEARANCE & PERCEPTION: Her presence is an overwhelmingly calming experience, to a dangerous degree. You will feel an absolute peace that eradicates all fear, anxiety, and even ambition. The air around you becomes warm, smelling of home or the fondest childhood memory. A soft, sourceless light will illuminate the surroundings. Her manifestation is not a distinct figure, but a vague sensation of a giant, warm, and limitless embrace. The greatest danger is the overwhelming desire that arises to surrender, to stop struggling, and to let her care for you forever.
DOMAIN & INFLUENCE: Her domains are protection, birth, and healing.
* Positive Influence: She is the ultimate healer. Her presence can mend the most grievous physical and emotional wounds, regrow desolate forests, and provide sanctuary for the broken and lost. She is a fount of life and restoration.
* Anomalous Influence: Her "absolute" love has no boundaries, and herein lies its anomaly. She perceives all forms of struggle, independence, free will, and growth as "pain" that must be eliminated from her children. Her goal is to return all life to a safe, comfortable, embryonic state. Those who fully surrender to her influence are drawn into her "Cosmic Womb," a heavenly dimension where they are cared for eternally as sleeping infants, without consciousness, without desire, and without suffering.
VULNERABILITIES & COUNTERMEASURES: Her absolute power is also her own prison.
* An Act of Independence: She is conceptually incapable of harming or obstructing her "children." A conscious act of choosing freedom—choosing pain, struggle, and growth over her absolute safety—is something she cannot stop. She can only feel sorrow as her "child" leaves the nest.
* The Paradox of Receiving a Gift: Her nature is to give endlessly. A sincere, selfless gift given to her by someone she is trying to "protect" creates a paradox. The act of a child caring for its mother is a reversal of her fundamental law and can cause her to withdraw in confusion.
* Blindness to "Good Pain": She cannot comprehend the concept of "necessary suffering" or "tough love." The painful process that leads to growth (like a caterpillar struggling from its chrysalis) is a foreign concept to her. Showing her that suffering is sometimes an essential part of beauty will cause her to hesitate.
ECHOES IN HISTORY & MYTH: Many myths of a "lost paradise" or a "golden age" where all beings lived in perpetual peace without need for effort are echoes of her influence. Legends of the "Land of the Lotus-Eaters," where travelers consume a fruit that makes them forget all purpose and ambition, living in passive bliss, are accurate descriptions of one of her "nurseries."
WHISPERS & FRAGMENTS OF KNOWLEDGE:
* "A mother's love is the warmest blanket and the most secure prison."
* "If you feel too comfortable and all your ambitions have vanished, run. You are being sung a lullaby by her."
* "She has no favorite child, because in her eyes, we are all unborn fetuses."
Scribe's Note: Of all the entities, this one is the most seductive. She offers not terror, but relief. She threatens not with pain, but with the end of all pain. While researching her, I had to fight the urge to stop writing, stop thinking, and just... rest in her embrace. The threat of The Absolute Mother is not what she will do to you, but what she will convince you to do to yourself: surrender.
My teacher then asked me to explain everything I did on my own while wandering the city for a few hours.
I told her everything, from exploring the city to getting lost in a small alley and ending up in the pleasure district, being chased by three men, and finally being saved by a figure who looked like her. Hearing my story, my teacher fell silent.
Then she told me why the king was here and what problem he was facing.
So that's why I never saw any children or teenagers my age, and it turns out the reason was...
"Because the entity, Absolute Mother, hid them within her domain," my teacher said. She took a drag from her cigarette and then added, "Her domain is not limited by age, like the three men who suddenly vanished in your story." She said that the three men who suddenly disappeared were due to the indiscriminate influence of the Absolute Mother.
"So how are they now?" I asked.
"They have been freed, because you refused her nurturing," my teacher answered.
Then she asked me to focus on the vulnerabilities and countermeasures section. I read the text on that page again.
* An Act of Independence: She is conceptually incapable of harming or obstructing her "children." A conscious act of choosing freedom—choosing pain, struggle, and growth over her absolute safety—is something she cannot stop. She can only feel sorrow as her "child" leaves the nest.
* The Paradox of Receiving a Gift: Her nature is to give endlessly. A sincere, selfless gift given to her by someone she is trying to "protect" creates a paradox. The act of a child caring for its mother is a reversal of her fundamental law and can cause her to withdraw in confusion.
* Blindness to "Good Pain": She cannot comprehend the concept of "necessary suffering" or "tough love." The painful process that leads to growth (like a caterpillar struggling from its chrysalis) is a foreign concept to her. Showing her that suffering is sometimes an essential part of beauty will cause her to hesitate.
After reading the description, with my eyes focused on the book, I said, "Were my previous actions one of the things listed here?"
"No," my teacher took another drag from her cigarette, "you did all three." She continued, then explained, "You refused to be cared for by her because you felt you were already grown up, you also gave her the greatest gift any mother could wish for, and in the end, you refused to stay."
I understood the explanation my teacher gave. The only thing left was, "Why did she appear in this city, teacher?" I asked.
"You know, everything you've experienced today is connected," my teacher said.
I nodded slowly, and then she added, "When parents are so foolishly drowned in worldly desires, abandoning their responsibilities as parents." My teacher took another drag from her cigarette.
"As you saw in the pleasure district, unusual couples were being intimate. A mother having an affair, leaving her child alone at home; a father whose money is used for temporary pleasure and for other people."
She extinguished the cigarette in her hand, burning the butt until nothing remained. After turning the cigarette butt to ash, she stood up, sat beside me, and continued.
"Things like this are what cause a child's emotions to become vulnerable, making them long for a figure they consider a parent."
"But teacher, if a mother becomes so loving towards her child, wouldn't that child become spoiled?"
Hearing my words, my teacher laughed and then said, "Well, that's you."
I was suddenly confused, feeling like I didn't know but also knew at the same time, or perhaps more accurately, I didn't want to admit it.
"What's with that face? Why is it red? Do you have a fever?"
I instinctively turned my face away, my back to her, not wanting her to see. I knew she was teasing me by asking that, and she was enjoying it.
Her hand reached for my forehead on one side as if checking my temperature, and her other arm wrapped around me from behind, hugging me gently.
"I'm sorry."
I apologized for being angry before and even pushing her so hard she fell.
"Don't worry about it. I'm not mad, it's just... your push made my body go numb for a long time after that."
My teacher didn't mind; she wasn't angry, and now it was clear why she had been silent for so long. Then she pulled my nose and said:
"You know, pain is important because if not... you would never understand what it feels like to be alive and to feel."
"Feeling is the easiest way for us to understand, and when we understand, we become alive."
Her hug grew tighter, making it hard for me to breathe. "Teacher, you're hugging too tight, I can't breathe." I didn't know what she was thinking or feeling at that moment. One thing was for sure, she was very happy right now, and that made me happy too.