Shien sighed with relief.
Good, Hoshizuma's gaze is guiding me, and that nosy little brat's out of the way. If not for that, I wouldn't even know where to go, this palace is freaking huge!
Shien turned right and glanced toward the entrance, where two armored guards stood watch.
"What are you staring at?" one of them asked.
"Excuse me, may I pass?" Shien asked, putting on a friendly face.
"How dare you! The royal gardens are for the royal family and their guests only."
Well then, maybe something else will work.
Shien shifted back into his pink-dress form.
"If I give you a kiss, will you let me in?" he asked, using hypnotic magic as he blew them a kiss.
"Yeees," they answered, stepping toward him.
Shien changed back into his buff form, knocked both guards out in an instant, and walked into the royal gardens.
Just as he was about to ask Hoshizuma in his mind to guide him again, he heard a raspy, female voice:
"I can't believe I lost again!"
"Pfff, you played like a child," another woman replied. From her tone Shien guessed she was older than the first.
A laugh answered them, neither clearly female nor male. It sounded cute, soft, and bright.
That was his target.
Shien reached out. A bouquet of flowers appeared in his hand: so beautiful, vibrant and elegantly arranged that it was impossible to look away.
He sniffed them.
Smells right. Gentle, pleasant but distinct, nothing like ordinary roses or other flowers.
It's time to make my move.
The god of lust headed toward the voices. He reached the end of the gardens, where two women and Haru were sitting on a bench, laughing and playing cards. Gari and Maldie immediately turned toward the stranger; Haru took a moment to see what his friends were staring at. When he looked, his honey-colored eyes met Shien's and he made a confused expression.
Shien blushed. His heart thudded.
W‑what is that reaction?! I've never loved anyone, but those honey eyes are… I've never seen anything like them!
"Who the hell are you?" Maldie asked, frowning.
"S‑sorry," he stammered, playing shy. "I got lost."
"Yeah, I'd believe you if I were stupid," Gari said. "You had to take out the guards to get here, and you've got flowers, definitely a Haru psycho fan."
"Huh?! I can have a psycho fan? Me?" Haru asked, surprised.
Oh, how innocent, modest, and pure! Of course you can, look at your gorgeous face!
No, focus, Shien. You're here to…
Shien looked at Haru's belly.
…right.
Maldie stood, rolled up her sleeves, and tensed her muscles.
"Wow! I didn't know you were so ripped!" Gari said, amazed.
"Heh, I worked long enough as a maid and helped out on my father's farm after hours to get this," Maldie replied with a teasing smile that quickly turned into a warning glare. "Give me one reason not to tear you to shreds, freak."
"Hey, what about me? Don't forget I'm his bodyguard!"
"Gari," Maldie said with slight irritation, "you should be happy you can wear normal clothes. Shion has freed us from all our other duties. That means until Haru gives birth, we share everything half and half. You protect him, I attack."
"Fine," Gari stood in front of Haru, shielding him. "Even if you beat Maldie, which I doubt, you'll have to get through me to hurt him!"
"Please, I mean no harm. I just wanted to congratulate Queen Haru, she's expecting."
"Huh?! How do you know that if it hasn't been announced yet? Seriously, who the fuck are you?!" Maldie shouted. Both her hands shifted into bear‑like paws.
Damn… I totally messed this up. As always, I'm talking too much, heh.
Shien glanced at Haru. Even with Gari shielding him, Shien caught a split‑second look on Haru's face: unsure, a little scared, and a little confused.
Awww, he looks like a frightened puppy.
So sweet and unreachable…
… I want him.
Shien blushed deeper with desire. Unfortunately, the last thought – "I want him" – slipped out loud.
"Like hell I'd let you even come close to him! Haru and Shion are happily in love! Haru's carrying our king's child!" Maldie snapped, then with a single strike to his torso sent him flying to the other end of the gardens.
Shien slammed into the castle's stone wall and collapsed to the ground.
Alright, I'll admit she surprised me.
At least she didn't aim for my face, that would've been a tragedy for the world.
"Heh, that was a good hit," Maldie said proudly, rubbing one arm. "But that kind of thing's not for my age anymore."
"That was awesome!" Gari exclaimed. "Wait, let me at least help!" The half‑dragon moved to massage Maldie's shoulders.
"O‑okay," the maid said, a little flustered.
"He's still not gone," Haru said, sounding more frightened than before.
Damn, I have to depend on others again. I want to do something, but I can't. I have to be careful so my wish won't be wasted… Shion… I want to hold your hand and hug you now.
If only I could hide in your arms from danger…
Shien shook the dust and dirt off his vest and cracked his neck.
"Not bad," he said, smiling.
He looked at the bouquet, crushed from the fall.
I don't want to fight them… I can't.
Time for the ultimate move.
He pushed off the ground and leapt forward, landing again by Haru, Maldie, and Gari. Haru's friends reflexively shielded him. Gari, unsure what Shien planned, spread her wings to protect Haru from magic.
But Shien didn't plan to attack, he took off his vest, revealing sculpted muscles in all their glory.
Gari and Maldie stared at him like at some idiot, not knowing what to do.
Oh, it's probably working. But this isn't the end of the show…
"Look at this, beautiful Queen Haru!" Shien declared.
Gari and Maldie stepped sideways so Haru could see.
"You should totally see what this dumb guy is doing," Maldie whispered in Haru's ear.
A bottle of oil appeared in Shien's hand; he poured it over his hair and shook it in the breeze. Then he summoned another bottle of oil and rubbed it over his bare, muscular torso. Gari couldn't help but burst out with laughter. The God didn't even care.
Facing Haru, whose expression showed only surprise, Shien launched his final technique.
He started to dance with all his might, to the music that played only in his head.
"Seriously, man, where did you come from?!" Maldie said, clearly surprised .
Gari was rolling on the floor laughing.
"How do you like it, Haru?" Shien asked, slightly out of breath. Drops of sweat rolled down his forehead.
"I-I don't really get what this is for. Sorry, but tell me, who are you again? You still haven't answered that."
Shien froze in shock, jaw dropping.
He ignored me and scolded me in the nicest, cutest way possible! Ah, that mix of unavailability and charm, you must be mine, Haru! I don't care that you're carrying another man's child, I want you.
"Then, what do you think about this?" With a smug smile, he then reached for his pants.
"If you pull anything out of there, you'll have to say goodbye to it forever," Maldie warned in a deadly tone, then fixed him with an icy glare.
Shien squealed like a little girl and hurriedly pulled his pants back up.
Haru looked at him, unsure what to make of him.
Shien could feel his advantage (if there was any at all) fading.
"Ahem, can we pretend that part with the pants never happened?"
"I can't with this guy, hahaha!" Gari said, laughing until she couldn't breathe.
"Is this going to take long? We'll soon have to go to the dinner," Maldie said, bored.
"I don't know why any of this is happening, but… it's weird and funny at the same time," Haru said.
Shien felt his heart leap again.
Ah! That rejection and that teeny tiny scolding, like he couldn't be mean to me.
I'm so jealous that the king has you all for himself!
I need to show him my true power, it's time for the grand finale!
The god summoned and poured another bottle on himself. His oiled up muscles glistened in the sunlight. After a while, Shien finished his dance: a spin, then a leap forward.
Head tilted back, eyes closed, slightly leaning backward with arms out but angled down, slick with oil, he stood panting with a silly, proud smile.
And then Shion entered the gardens.
*
Hoshizuma pressed a hand to his face; his expression showed embarrassment and irritation.
"Jupiter has strayed from its path," he spat through his teeth in anger. "Which means the trial ended in success for Heaven and Earth. I didn't expect Jupiter to have such a spectacular defeat, not even lasting to the third trial."
"Then let me out of here, damn it!" Ayame demanded.
"I'll do it, young Hoshigane, on one condition. Bring him back here to me. I must personally mete out his punishment."
"No way! Do you know how much that trip cost me? Your god, your trouble."
"Don't get so worked up, young Hoshigane." Hoshizuma held out his hand. In his palm appeared what looked like a handful of golden ribbons. "Say my name and the name of this place. If you want to teleport to the palace, say Shion or Haru's name. Each teleport will burn one ribbon."
"What if the god refuses to cooperate, or tries to break free?"
"Then," Hoshizuma said in a demonic voice, "I'll go catch him myself, and he won't want me to have to do that, because for the rest of his miserable existence he'll remember what it means to fail Hoshizuma's orders."
Ayame, asking no more, spoke her brother's name and vanished in gold-and-white flames.
Hoshizuma sighed.
He hadn't felt such a flood of cringe in over ten thousand years.