OST: Senjougahara Tore
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"All right, time for bed."
Toru put away the hair dryer. In these three years, he had already learned how to take care of a child.
Back then, things like changing diapers and mixing formula had troubled him for a long time. But no matter what, Shio was his and Ijichi's... no, she should now be called Nijika Kitahara... their daughter. In Japan, a wife takes her husband's surname after marriage.
However difficult it might be, as a father he had to learn.
Holding his daughter's hand, making sure she was warmly dressed, Toru led her to the bedroom.
They had once lived in a two-story house. After his wife passed away, afraid of being reminded of her and unable to bear the cold emptiness of living there with only his daughter, he had moved here.
"All right, go to sleep."
Toru drew the child into his arms. His only remaining solace now was his daughter. If he were to lose her too, he could not imagine what meaning there would be left in this simulation…
In his past simulations, he had always had a clear goal, something to blindly chase toward the pinnacle of skill.
But what should an ordinary person strive for?
Nothing more than rice, oil, salt, vinegar, tea... and a happy family.
Four years ago, he had lost half his life. From now on, he didn't want to lose the other half.
"Daddy, Shio can't sleep."
Resting on her father's arm, Shio Kitahara looked up at him with bright, watery eyes.
"Then Daddy will tell you a story. What does Shio want to hear?" Toru's voice was gentle.
"Um… Shio wants to hear about Mommy."
Hearing his daughter's request, Toru was silent for a long time, then said softly, "Shio's mommy was a very beautiful person, and very gentle. No matter how unreasonable Daddy's requests were, she would never get angry."
Back in high school, when he suddenly asked to form a band, Nijika had agreed right away.
Normally, when someone already had a band, they wouldn't agree to such a thing, would they?
It was exactly Nijika's gentle, lovely nature that had drawn Toru toward her, that made him yearn for her, and that ultimately led him to marry her.
"Mommy was a great cook. Daddy used to love the tea she brewed. Before Shio was born, Mommy did all the housework. She was amazing." Toru looked at his daughter, unable to stop the memories of ten years with his wife from flooding back.
Why had Nijika left him so easily?
She had been like an angel.
Suddenly descending by his side, only to leave just as suddenly.
"No wonder Auntie always says Daddy isn't worthy of Mommy…" Shio Kitahara said curiously. In these years, Seika Ijichi had blamed Nijika's death on Toru, and her words had inevitably been harsh.
Toru chuckled lightly. "She's not wrong. Daddy really wasn't worthy of Mommy. Mommy was a pure angel. For someone ordinary like Daddy to marry Mommy and have a little angel like Shio... that already used up all the luck of my life."
"Hee-hee." Shio Kitahara gave a silly giggle in his arms, a little shy at being called a little angel.
"But Daddy is confident about one thing."
Shio wriggled out of his arms and opened her eyes wide. "What is it?"
"Daddy loves Nijika more than anyone else in the world. That's the one thing Daddy will never back down on."
"Daddy is amazing."
"Of course. Daddy is the most amazing person in the world."
"But Auntie says Daddy is the most useless, that he couldn't even save Mommy."
"…"
Toru gave a helpless smile and turned off the bedside lamp. This little one had inherited her mother's knack for teasing, only she used it on him.
Honestly...
"All right, time to sleep."
"Mm."
Shio found a comfortable spot in his arms and slowly closed her eyes.
At the doorway, in ghostly form, Nijika Ijichi spent a long time calming herself before slowly retreating from the bedroom.
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[Your husband loves you more than anyone else. You understand this clearly, yet you can no longer stay by his side.
Time flows on, never ceasing. You regret, but there is nothing you can do. Shio Kitahara grows older day by day, but the one beside her is not you, her birth mother. This may be the greatest regret of your life.]
Nijika Ijichi desperately wanted the simulator to deceive her.
Even a lie would be fine.
But the simulator forced her to face bloody reality and a bleak life.
"Is the outcome of the simulation really unchangeable?"
[Yes, Master. All operations within the Ultimate Mama Simulator are controlled by the host system… This simulator cannot reverse the result.]
What is this host system?
[That is top secret. We cannot disclose.]
[Master, you have countless opportunities to simulate. You need not be so sad… You could even marry the real Toru.]
Hearing the simulator say this, Nijika relaxed a little. Thinking she might be able to mend the regrets of the simulation even made her slightly happy.
Then she continued watching the simulation.
But little angel Nijika quickly found herself unable to stay happy.
[Your daughter's second serious illness came in the autumn of her fifth year. When autumn set in, the sudden change in temperature easily caused children to catch cold.
Weak since birth, Shio Kitahara had to be put on IV drips for three days before her fever subsided. Seeing his daughter like this, Toru was reminded of his wife's death. It was as if everything were repeating before his eyes, and he was powerless again. He could not accept it.
Was he going to watch the one he loved die before his eyes again?
But Toru was not someone who sat and waited for death. He soon began painstaking research in medicine.
In the years after your death, he had slowly been studying related fields. Now, realizing his daughter was drifting toward death, Toru could no longer accept being helpless. He wanted to give his daughter a healthy, whole life.
In the next two years, no one knew exactly what Toru was doing in private. They only knew his health had grown much worse. In turn, his knowledge of medicine was increasing at a frenzied pace. Soon he entered a medical research lab, and by his own intellect assembled a dedicated research team…]
"...Toru-kun, what are you doing?"
Nijika Ijichi watched the simulator screen. The middle-aged man inside coughed harshly several times, his expression haggard, and her heart hurt beyond words.
She knew her husband was using the stress-training method, the very thing that had killed her, and he had restarted it, using it on himself. And he was doing it for their daughter's sake?
This fool.
[With his research direction fixed, Toru, relying on a monstrous intellect, completed the development of the drug in only three years, followed by half a year of clinical trials. This medicine, which enhanced the immune system of human cells, was called "Panacea." One month later, the patent rights were transferred to Seika Ijichi.]
Why?
Toru knew he would not live many more years. The years spent developing the drug had left him neglectful of his daughter, and he felt deep guilt.
He intended to spend his final time fully with his daughter.
Nijika Ijichi's heart instantly sank to the bottom of a lake. The icy water made it hard for her to breathe.
Toru-kun… is going to die?