- At the Orphanage
After sitting on the bench beneath the old camphor tree, Kanae finally began to speak.
At first, her voice was steady.
But the more she spoke, the less it held.
The Matron listened without interruption, her hands folded neatly in her lap, eyes never leaving Kanae's trembling form.
"… It's my fault," Kanae whispered at last, her fingers tightening against her sleeves. "I shouldn't have cornered him like that. I thought I would be fine. I thought I understood him"
Her voice cracked.
"But when I heard what Kagerou-san said... something inside me refused to accept it"
Her breathing grew uneven.
"Matron… I don't know what to do. I promised him I wouldn't push him away. But after what he said… I…" Her voice collapsed into a sob. "I felt like I didn't want to see him anymore"
Tears spilled freely now.
"It hurts. But I'm also sad. And… angry"
The Matron rose without a word and drew Kanae into her embrace.
"Oh, my child…"
Her hand stroked Kanae's back slowly, gently. But instead of calming her, it broke the last of Kanae's composure. She clutched at the fabric of the Matron's kimono like a child far younger than her years.
"I'm sorry, Kanae," the Matron said softly.
Kanae stiffened.
"I always believed you were extraordinary. So mature. So capable. I convinced myself you didn't need guidance the way other children did." Her voice trembled faintly. "I treated you like an adult long before you had the right to be one"
She pulled back just enough to cup Kanae's tear-streaked face.
"That was my mistake. There are things no one learns alone"
"N-No, Matron, this... This is my fault, I-"
"Kanae"
The single word stopped her.
The Matron wiped the tears from her cheeks and smiled, not indulgent, not amused, but deeply tender.
"My child… do you know what you're feeling right now?"
Kanae shook her head weakly.
"I… I just feel a great sense of loss"
The Matron hummed softly.
"And do you know what caused that loss?"
Kanae opened her mouth.
"It's my fau-"
"No"
The firmness in her voice was gentle, but absolute.
"You feel a great sense of loss because you are in love with him"
Kanae's breath caught.
"And what you felt wasn't anger"
A pause.
"It was jealousy"
---
- At the Rengoku Residence.
"… I just said what she wanted to hear, Father," Kagerou finished after explaining everything that happened with Kanae. His arms were crossed, brows slightly furrowed. "Was I wrong? I mean-"
*Plak!*
A firm palm struck the back of his head.
The sound echoed louder than necessary.
"Aw! What was that for?!" Kagerou turned sharply, rubbing the sore spot.
"Stupid!" Shinjuro barked without hesitation.
"Stupid!" Kyojuro immediately echoed, eyes closed and nodding seriously, even though he had absolutely no idea why his brother was stupid.
From his perspective, Kagerou had simply told the truth, and telling the truth was good.
But when else would he get the rare opportunity to call his always-perfect older brother "stupid" without consequence?
"… Stupid," Senjuro followed more softly, almost testing the word under his breath.
Obanai, standing slightly behind them, wisely chose silence. His mismatched eyes observed everything.
Kagerou stared at all of them in disbelief.
"I was being honest! What's wrong with that?"
Shinjuro exhaled sharply through his nose.
"You're wrong because you were honest"
Kagerou blinked.
"What kind of logic is that? So I should've lied instead? Is that what you're teaching us?"
"You don't lie," Shinjuro snapped. "But you don't throw the whole truth like a sword either!"
The room went quiet for a moment.
Kagerou frowned, clearly not understanding.
"I don't see the problem"
"Of course you don't"
"Lying is bad, Father," Kyojuro suddenly declared, placing his hands on his hips like a righteous little warrior. "Mother once said-"
*Plak!*
Another clean strike.
"Ouch!"
"This is an adult matter!"Shinjuro roared. "Stay out of this!"
Kyojuro immediately retreated two steps, rubbing his head in wounded confusion.
Senjuro quietly stepped back beside Obanai.
The two exchanged a brief glance, a silent agreement that surviving this conversation required absolute silence.
Shinjuro dragged a hand down his face.
For a brief moment, his anger thinned.
"… There are truths," he began, voice lower now, "that you say because you want to clear your own conscience"
Kagerou's fingers slowly stopped rubbing his head.
"And there are truths," Shinjuro continued, "that you say because the other person is ready to hear them"
The air in the room shifted.
"You told her because you thought it was correct," Shinjuro said. "But you didn't stop to think whether she was prepared to carry that weight"
Kagerou's jaw tightened.
"… I didn't want to deceive her"
"That's not the same as protecting her"
The words landed heavier than the slap.
Silence followed.
Even Kyojuro stopped moving.
Shinjuro looked away for a moment, his expression shadowed by something quieter, something older than anger.
"I thought you were a genius," he muttered. "So I focused on your sword. I figured you'd learn the rest yourself"
His shoulders seemed heavier than before.
"But understanding emotion… is not something talent solves"
He glanced at Kagerou again.
"… That's my failure as a father"
The room fell completely still.
The chaotic energy from moments ago vanished.
Kagerou didn't know what to say.
For the first time, he wasn't defending himself.
He was thinking.
And in the corner of the room, Obanai watched closely, as if memorizing this moment.
"… If only Ruka still-"
Shinjuro stopped himself.
Too late.
The name settled into the room like ash.
Kyojuro's shoulders stiffened.
Kagerou lowered his head.
They were the ones who remembered her most clearly.
"… You didn't have to bring Mother into this," Kagerou said softly.
Not accusing.
Just tired.
Shinjuro closed his eyes briefly.
"… I know"
The admission came easier than expected.
Silence followed.
Not awkward.
Not tense.
Just full.
The kind of silence that only exists in houses that have lost someone.
Wind brushed through the yard.
The distant clack of bamboo echoed faintly.
Then...
"… Then what should I do, Father?"
Shinjuro opened his eyes.
"You're still asking?"
Kagerou didn't respond.
He just looked at him.
Confused.
Earnest.
Young.
Shinjuro exhaled.
"… Go apologize to that young miss"
"Alright. I'll go now"
He stood immediately.
"Wait"
Kagerou stopped.
"What?"
"Not now"
Shinjuro leaned back slightly.
"If you go now, you'll only be apologizing to ease yourself"
That landed.
"Give her time," he continued. "She needs space to sort her feelings. And so do you"
Kagerou hesitated.
Then slowly returned to his place.
"… Understood. I'll wait"
"Good"
A pause.
Then, almost too quiet... "… When will you realize what you're feeling is love?"
"What did you say, Father?"
"Nothing"
Shinjuro waved a hand dismissively.
"Go wash yourself. You smell like smoke"
"… Yes, Father"
Kagerou left.
And Shinjuro stared at the empty space where his son had stood.
"… Ruka," he murmured once the boys were gone, "… I'm not good at this"
--------
#A/N: Without me even realizing it, this fanfic has reached 1k collections. It's not incredibly high, but it's definitely not low either, especially considering I started writing this story on a whim.
When I wrote the first chapter, I didn't actually know that much about Demon Slayer. I had read the manga and watched the anime, of course, but I wasn't deeply familiar with all the details. So with every chapter I write, I end up doing research to make sure what I'm portraying stays consistent with canon. In a way, I learn something new about Demon Slayer each time.
It's hard sometimes, but I genuinely enjoy the process. I guess that's one of the reasons I became a writer in the first place.
Lately, though, I haven't had as much free time as I did when I first started writing. Back then, I could update almost every day. Now, it's usually once a week at most.
Sometimes I honestly wonder how other writers manage to upload multiple chapters at once. Do they write all day? Are they just built differently? Or am I just slow? I really don't know. Because I usually only write during my work breaks and on holidays, my writing time is honestly pretty limited. I can't sit down and write all day even if I want to.
Anyway, back to the point, some of you might be wondering whether this fanfic will continue. Since I'm also a reader myself, I know exactly how it feels when a story you're invested in suddenly stops halfway.
That's why I just want to say... Don't worry.
I will finish this story.
Even if it takes a little longer between updates, I'm not abandoning it. Ahaha~
That's probably all I wanted to say. Thank you for staying with me, and please look forward to the next chapter!