"Hahaha! Then what? What talisman did you throw?!" Sun Xiaoxiao laughed so hard she collapsed on All-Purpose Shop's sofa.
Looked innocent. "How would I know? Haven't even identified all talismans Heavenly Court ancestors gave. Just said throw cleansing ones at anything unclean. Didn't tell anything else."
Sun Xiaoxiao burst laughing again. "Best news this year! Didn't Japan say anything?"
Tapped phone. "Sneezewort, play Japanese news."
Sneezewort was simple AI Tony made after complaining always used same one. Didn't use much anyway.
"According reports, mudslide occurred near Yasukuni Shrine. Shrine completely destroyed..." Mechanical female voice read steadily.
Sun Xiaoxiao gleefully grabbed phone, found related news, forwarded straight family group. Why enjoy alone when everyone can enjoy?
After seeing Sun Xiaoxiao off, immediately called Banner. Blocked door, swearing wouldn't leave until experiment succeeded!
Unfortunately, hopes dashed again.
Looking at Loki, Thor's brother, outside door, face turned ugly.
"What now?! Better give good reason!" Narrowed eyes, speaking ominously.
Loki raised eyebrow. "Oh my, juggler with stick? Suggest show respect gods, unlike those Midgardian friends."
Thor smiled awkwardly, made casual gesture, silently backed several steps.
Showed sweet smile. "Hulk! Hit him!"
Before Loki could react, green figure burst through door, slammed into him. Instantly went flying.
Before could crash café across street, Hulk grabbed Loki's foot, smashed left and right.
Loki like rag doll being whipped around.
Thor sucked breath, touching face. Good thing hadn't talked back!
"Ahem, enough, right? More he'll die." Thor said hesitantly. "Still brother."
Glanced over. "Hulk! Come wash hands! So dirty!"
Hulk obediently threw Loki hard into crater been smashing into. Spat disdainfully. "Weak god!"
Loki lay crater dead eyes. Second time! Second time Earth beaten beyond recognition!
Thor looked sympathetically brother. "Why run mouth?"
"So what's going on?!" Looked Thor irritably.
Coby already diligently repairing door, windows. Loki pulled ground fix road.
"Like this—looking for father." Thor said quickly. "Loki said sent Father you."
Sighed. What this? Whole family decided go-to? Everything came?!
Grabbed phone. "Sneezewort, call Odin!"
Video call connected quickly. Watched expressionlessly Odin sat sofa, ocean background, bikini beauties beside.
"Hey! Gemini! What's up? Want party?" Odin asked smiling.
Playful sounds other end came clearly through phone. Thor, Loki showed disbelieving expressions.
Said flatly: "Sons looking. Reporting location."
Odin's face instantly turned serious. "Wait!"
Phone screen went black, sound didn't disappear. Heard Odin coaxing beauties move away. Thor, Loki's expressions complex. Really father?!
"Ahem, okay!" Screen returned. Odin, just been flowered shorts sofa bikini beauties, now wore tattered clothes sitting cliff edge. "Ready. Let come!"
Showed pained expression. What family playing? Mischievously, didn't mention sons already heard earlier conversation. Playfully brought brothers find Stephen, having open portal. Apparition couldn't take many.
Before leaving, Banner worried, followed.
When Thor, Loki walked through portal, saw father, back lonely sat cliff-edge stone.
Thor clutched head painfully. "Father, stop pretending! Just calling someone baby, weren't you?"
Pulled sunflower seeds, found good spot Banner, excitedly watched Asgard family drama.
Odin understood instantly—call heard sons. Old face couldn't hold. "Ahem, don't talk nonsense. Anyway, know why here, no need words. Lived so long. Time retire."
Thor had bad feeling. "Wait! Father!"
Odin's remaining eye glared hard. "Don't speak! Listen finish!"
Distance, Banner munched seeds, listening relish Asgard gossip. Who would've thought? Thor actually had sister! Legendary Goddess Death, Hela! Shocking news. Couldn't help praising self. Trip wasn't wasted!
Finally, Odin said something Thor. Too far hear clearly. That moment, Odin transformed entirely golden light, dissipating wind.
Dropped seeds. What hell? Old folks retire suddenly?!
Before could react, distant sky turned pitch black. Figure appeared abruptly.
Looked carefully—tall woman black hair, slightly disheveled over back, expression proud.
"Kneel." Before could finish examining legendary Goddess Death, goddess's first words left everyone confused.
"What?" Thor looked bewildered. "Are sister?"
Hela laughed mockingly. Swept hands over head. Messy black hair instantly became slick, stood up, forming head full spikes.
Swept hands waist. Two black longswords appeared hands. "Say once more. Kneel!"
How could Loki take that? Earth, beaten old man, beaten green monster. Back Asgard, sealed thousands years, now someone this arrogant? Loki immediately bowed slightly, swept hands, two daggers appeared. Black suit gradually changed green armor. Golden antler helmet protected face charged Hela.
However charged, flew back same way. Clutching chest coughing, looked angrily Thor. "Just watching brother get beaten?!"
Thor laughed. Clothes also changed armor red cape. Mjolnir thrown directly.
What Thor didn't expect—enemies always smashed away, this time caught hammer one hand!
Seeing this, quietly tugged Banner's clothes. Two sneaked backward. Family matters weren't suitable outsiders interfere. Besides, three siblings formidable. Watching one thing, getting involved bad!
Before taken two steps, heard Loki's heart-wrenching shout. "Heimdall! Bring back!"
"No!" Thor couldn't stop. Bifrost descended, directly covering three tangled together.
Before could breathe relief, smaller Bifrost flew straight two spectators.
Faces showed horror vanished rainbow. Only circular rune remained ground.
That Bifrost manager! Heimdall! Thought resentfully, gripping Banner's collar tightly, afraid thrown off during transport.
Banner's reaction wasn't slow. Immediately called Hulk, protecting arms. Just wait transport end.
Unfortunately, things didn't go planned. Three siblings ahead started fighting inside Bifrost.
Bifrost transport speeds weren't all same. Who knew Hela could move inside Bifrost?
Kicked Loki out two three moves, then Thor. Didn't touch Banner because when Thor kicked, instinctively grabbed Hulk's pants, entering spatial turbulence together.
Couldn't help wailing inside. This price watching drama?! Too high!!
Familiar loss consciousness.
When woke, looking surroundings, expressionlessly blasted strange aliens trying capture. This place—ha, how long since been? Really lucky landing spot somewhat familiar!
Sakaar. Banner rubbed head. Seeing familiar scene, felt headache. Scrambled up garbage mountain, loudly shouting name.
Soon heard Banner's voice. Two quickly reunited. Good thing Hulk never let go, or landed who knows where.
After discussion, led Hulk hijack ship wanted rob them, flying toward Grandmaster's arena. Decided stay Grandmaster first. After all, just fight arena few times? Hulk happy!
Specific route home depended when could contact Star-Lord. Might as well—notified everyone early. Seclusion, don't bother. Otherwise this kind thing happen again.
When Grandmaster saw Hulk, received warmly. Hearing intentions, Grandmaster no objections. Said frankly since Hulk left, championship's prestige dropped considerably. Return could raise competition's appeal.
Grandmaster also introduced new friend—couldn't fight, but very smart.
Hulk watched expressionlessly Loki walked out.
When Loki saw them, froze too.
Hulk unconsciously flexed fists. Loki immediately jumped back. "Don't get excited! How here?!"
Grandmaster looked curiously three. "Know each other?"
Laughed coldly. "Were already home. Thanks brother, far from home again. Who knows when can return!"
Grandmaster looked excitedly Hulk. "Beat up vent? But don't kill. Brain quite useful!"
Loki looked Grandmaster horror, then Hulk already cracking knuckles. Immediately shouted: "Know how get back! Have way!"
Raised eyebrow. From bracelet pulled long-unused parchment contract. "Sign this! Then can spar Hulk!"
Hulk roared Loki appropriately. Without checking what said, Loki immediately signed "Loki Laufeyson."
Smiled Grandmaster. "Sorry, might not get watch live this time!"
Grandmaster chuckled. "Fine! Hulk favorite champion. Since left, no one wants watch!"
Loki had bad feeling but didn't understand where slipped.
"Hulk! Hit him!" At command, Hulk immediately charged, expertly grabbed Loki's foot, smashed repeatedly floor.
Caught floating contract, sneering tore up. "Didn't expect, did you? Spell can detect true names. Think signing fake name would work? Hulk, keep hitting until signs real name!"
Finally, after being smashed full three minutes, Loki compromised. Red-eyed, signed "Loki Odinson" contract.
As name signed, contract became two golden lights, flying each. Showed satisfied smile. Loki showed resentful expression.
Contract stipulated after returning Earth, Loki couldn't deceive any means, must obey three commands. If violated, consumed endless hellfire, body and soul.
As apology stealing Grandmaster's companion, made Grandmaster many magical items. Though Grandmaster lacked nothing, magical things made give up Loki, agreeing let take when left.
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