9th of January, 9:00 am, Kana's house
"Come on already, we'll come too late if you keep slacking around." Ruby shifted enthusiastically left and right while she stood in Kana's doorway.
"You told me you'd come along today, don't chicken out now," she said as she glanced down at her phone once more. Just as Ruby finished her sentence, the door to Kana's bathroom cracked open and out stepped the red-haired loli senpai. Her make-up was a bit excessive, not something the old Kana would've worn, especially not for a quick stroll.
"Could you stop nagging?" Kana nagged.
"Like, I'm already on my way," She said as she picked her bag up.
Kana shut the door to her bedroom behind them as they both stepped out into the hallway. Two days had passed since Kana first left her room, always with Ruby by her side. Kana had now finally agreed to come along to watch Ruby's idol practice. The cold winter air blew through Kana's hair the second they opened the front door. Kana had a plan. Ruby thought of it as a bit childish, but Kana wanted to surprise Mem-Cho, who would also be at the practice today.
"You think he will maybe just go away?" Ruby asked.
Kana, who walked beside Ruby, tilted her head slightly.
"I mean the weird guy," Ruby added.
Kana looked ahead again as she understood what Ruby meant. "No," she said after a moment, "it's just like bullying. If you get bullied, you need to show them that you can fight back. Not even bullies like being punched…"
"I mean, I am not saying you should attack the guy, but you know," Kana added quickly.
"I know… But what should I do then?" Ruby looked up from the cold pavement, right at Kana. "You of all people have to know... You've been in the industry for so long already."
"This never happened to me…" Kana raised her chin slightly and looked at the sky while she continued to walk straight ahead on the deserted sidewalk. "I guess nobody was ever that interested in me…"
"I'm sorry for assuming, I didn't mean to…" A spike of shame ran through Ruby as her head sank even more. "Just forget I said anything."
"Wellll…" Kana said after a moment of silence, "Don't say that… It never happened to me, but I can still do my best to help you," Kana looked down again, back at Ruby.
"But what if he decides to hurt you? He probably wouldn't hurt me, but when you're in his way…" Concern was edged onto Ruby's face as she asked a question that had been on her mind ever since she asked to stay over at Kana's house.
"I don't think so. I think he wouldn't mind hurting you too… People like him are human waste." Kana's voice dripped with disgust while her face reflected what's wrong with society.
"But why is he doing this then?"
Ruby's apparent innocence made Kana feel warm inside. "I can only guess, but he probably thinks that you love him too," she said
"Why would he think something like that? I don't even know that guy." Ruby's fingertips turned a bit cold.
"It's some kind of mental disorder…" Kana replied after she thought for a while, "He was probably at one of our shows, and you smiled at him, or you looked at him for a second too long while signing his merch… And now he thinks that you want him too… People like him really need to feel a woman's touch; although, I wouldn't want to subject any woman on this earth to such a person."
"Poor guy," Ruby said.
"Excuse m-" Kana loudly exclaimed as a confused blush spread on her face, barely visible through the makeup. She caught herself again as she saw that they had entered the train station, and a few people looked at her funny. "What do you mean?" she whispered.
"I mean, he's probably really miserable…"
Ruby's words made the hair on Kana's neck stand up. She angrily whipped her head around and looked at Ruby while they entered their train. "NO… Stop that…"
"...Being a miserable piece of shit is no excuse for this… I was miserable too, but I never even considered doing stuff like that… Or Aqua, you know how he can be, but he also managed to stay mostly normal. You're just too kind."
Since it was already past rush hour, they had actually found two seats to sit down in, just before the train began to drive and left the station.
"You're right. Showing sympathy would only enable him," Ruby said.
A few moments of awkward silence passed, the only sound was the quiet voices around them, which mostly kept to themself as the train quietly drove down the rails. "What's he up to anyways?" Kana asked after a while, "I mean Aqua."
Ruby's head turned away from Kana so she couldn't see her face. "I don't care about what he does anymore…"
"But why?" Kana asked as she leaned forward to try and still get a glance at Ruby's face.
"Why? Are you seriously asking me why? He drugged me when I trusted him most-" Ruby's eyes were filled with a burning fury as she suddenly stopped speaking and turned around. She pressed her finger against Kana's chest while her eyes wandered around the wagon. Ruby sighed and leaned back as she saw a few curious eyes lay upon them.
"You could've died because of his stupid plan of keeping me safe at any cost. I hate that he treats me like a little kid who can't make their own decisions. He still hasn't even apologized."
Kana, who just listened to Ruby and didn't hush away even when it felt like Ruby's finger would bore right into her chest, spoke. "... Just make sure that this is really what you want…"
Various emotions flashed through Ruby's eyes before she sank even deeper into her chair. "I think he is studying for university or something like that… I haven't seen him in probably a week by now." Her voice was very quiet, her anger gone, like a balloon deflated of its air.
…
At first, they had to practice at home; Miyako told them that a studio would be too expensive since they barely made any money. But times had changed by now; B-Komachi was almost a household name, gaining popularity, so Miyako finally decided to let them practice in a real studio a few months ago. Ruby and Kana entered the building. Miyako had selected one that looked like it was built just a few years back; it stood on the west side of Shibuya, almost Setagaya. Kana's stomach felt weirder the further she climbed the stairs; every step added to her anxious feeling. Ruby walked up the steps like normal, completely oblivious to the battle Kana fought just a bit behind her.
Why am I feeling like this?
I decided to do this yesterday, I can't back out now…
Calm down, Kana, it's just Mem-Cho. She won't judge you, she's like your best friend, and Miyako is more your mom than your actual mom…
But what if they pity me? If I only see a hint of pity in their eyes, I would probably die on the spot. I don't want your pity…
And that Keiko girl will be there too. Ruby says that she is cute, too, but what if she hates me, or worse…?
Kana… Stop looking for excuses; fear isn't weakness, but letting it control your life is.
Damn, that's almost poetic. From whom did I steal this quote?
Anyway, what's the worst that can happen?
That they pity you? Great, just move on then…
They are more likely to just be nice and supportive, so just do it.
Ruby pushed the door open and stepped into the room. Kana stood next to the door in a way she couldn't see into the room, and vice versa. She could hear voices in the room — Mem-Cho, Ruby, somebody else. Ruby looked back at her as she held the door open and waited. Kana sighed once and stepped in after Ruby. The morning sun hit her eyes straight on; it was so bright she had to shut her eyes as her thoughts cursed out whoever had designed this building. A moment later, she was adjusted enough for her eyes to squint through the room. Every resemblance of any conversation had stopped the second she entered the room.
The silence stretched; nobody, not even Ruby, dared to speak for some reason.
"Hi," Kana said hesitantly, still not able to fully open her eyes. The bright sun on her snow white skin made her scar probably stand out far more, while her makeup definitely shone like she herself was a star.
Why is nobody saying anything?
Is it that bad?
I thought I did a pretty good job covering it up with makeup…
Maybe it's that I'm not welcome here anymore…
Like, officially, I am no member anymore so I also have no right to be here right now.
Kana was ripped out of her thoughts by the sudden sensation of something colliding with her. The sensation felt like whatever held her wanted to break her ribcage. When she fully opened her eyes, she saw Mem-Cho, arms wrapped around her torso and head right next to hers.
"Why didn't you tell me? I would've come to you." Mem-Cho's voice was weak; however, her grip definitely wasn't.
"Air." Kana yelped out as her lungs felt like they were being crushed.
"...Because I needed to do it like this," Kana said after she felt Mem-Cho release a bit of pressure from her without even remotely letting go.
From a few meters back, Ruby silently watched the reunion take place, leaning against the wall next to Keiko, who also just looked at the two of them.
"I understand," Mem-Cho said.
Then she suddenly pulled back; a shiver ran down Kana's spine as Mem-Cho's eyes darted around in their sockets just a few centimeters in front of her. She tried to escape from Mem-Cho's grasp, but also not really.
"...Nope-" Mem-Cho spoke up again after a long moment of silence. "You are definitely still just as much of a cutie as before."
She let go of Kana's head and cuddled her once more before she pulled away entirely. "It feels good to have you back…"
When she finally got to it, Kana looked around the room, no matter who she looked at. Be it Miyako, Ruby, Mem-Cho, or even the new girl, she was not able to find a single hint of pity in any eye.
…
It was dark outside, but Akane, who had just landed back in Tokyo, coming back from her trip to Miyazaki, was determined to still visit Aqua today. She had been stuck in Miyazaki for the last two days; she hadn't planned for her to find the answer on her first day there, so her flight back wasn't on the same day. She initially wanted to book a new, earlier flight, but decided that she should rather think about all of this for a bit longer. Still, after all the thinking, she was at the same point as before; confronting Aqua would be the best step; she could've also kept it for herself, but it felt like the new knowledge about Aqua's past life would be far more useful in direct dialogue.
She was so lost in thought that she barely paid any mind to her surroundings, but after a few minutes, something started to feel weird. She began to pay closer attention to everything, and there it was, again. The same car, again, and again, and this house, she had already seen it just a minute ago. Akane realized that no matter what she did, she seemed to be stuck in some sort of loop, not allowing her to leave the area. Suddenly, she heard a familiar voice behind her; whipping around, Tsukuyomi stood right behind her.
"Your actions would not lead to your anticipated outcome," she said in a monotone voice.
"You again. Why are you here this time?" Akane tried to take a few steps towards Tsukuyomi, but quickly realised that there was no point in it.
"To warn you," Tsukuyomi said, "Aqua is corrupted."
"What are you saying? I need to be there for him, especially now," Akane tried to argue, slightly taken aback by Tsukuyomi's blunt response.
"Your conclusion is correct… Is what I would say under normal circumstances, but you are missing crucial information." Tsukuyomi reached behind her back to pull out a black book that she couldn't possibly have stored there.
"Take this. I should've given it to you when we met last time, yet my fear was just too great… You must read it if you want to achieve your goals, I cannot interfere any more… Otherwise… I have already said too much. I will not be able to hold you back from making your decision, just know that if you confront him now, nothing good will come."
Tsukuyomi was gone again just as quickly as she had appeared, leaving Akane baffled, standing in the middle of the quiet sidewalk, the book tightly gripped and pressed against her chest.