Chapter 125: Brazil
"What!" The other two guys' jaws dropped in disbelief. Of course, this didn't include Sheldon.
Ron ignored Rajesh's pleading eyes: "Of course it's true. Sheldon can back me up. Rajesh's family is literally rich enough to buy a small country."
Sheldon nodded while the other two stared in shock: "Yes, I helped Rajesh notarize some legal documents before. If you compare it to comic book characters, Rajesh's family has Tony Stark money."
Sheldon was met with two stunned faces.
"I don't get it - what kind of selection committee decides who makes this list? I can't find any common thread with those people you just mentioned, except that they're all under thirty."
"Come on, this is People magazine. Obviously, the people chose me."
The magazine name and the word "people" are both spelled P-E-O-P-L-E in English.
"Who are these 'people,' exactly? What criteria do they use? What makes them qualified judges? Why is accidentally finding some space rock that's been floating around for billions of years more impressive than the work of any other scientist under thirty?"
Ron stayed quiet. He could tell Sheldon was just being a sore loser.
"Oh my God! I bet Emma Stone's friends don't trash-talk her like this!" Rajesh stormed out, slamming the door behind him.
"Are you happy now?"
"Absolutely," Sheldon nodded smugly. Leonard just stared at the ceiling in silence. Meanwhile, Ron, who had finished his dinner during their argument, stood up and patted Leonard's shoulder sympathetically.
"If you're still planning to chase after Penny, maybe don't mention Rajesh's family situation."
"Why not?" Leonard asked, confused.
"No particular reason. We live in a capitalist society where liking money and marrying for it isn't exactly shameful."
Ron glanced around at all of them, speaking with meaning. "If you really consider Rajesh a friend, it's best to keep quiet about his background. Just in LA alone, I know over a dozen people who'd kidnap someone for pocket change."
Are you kidding? This is the notorious City of Angels. Among just the street racers who roll with Dom Toretto, Ron could easily find more than half with rap sheets.
A quiet night followed.
The next day, finally remembering he actually had a job, Ron returned to his office to a warm welcome from his team.
"Boss, you're finally back! If you hadn't shown up, I was gonna split the account funds with everyone and dissolve the operation," Andy joked.
"Then I'd hunt you to the ends of the earth and drag you back." Ron smiled and looked at Arthur, who handled intelligence: "Any particularly juicy intel lately? Feels like we haven't been operational in forever.
Maybe it's time to find a mark and earn back your bonuses for this year."
"Actually, yes," Arthur nodded: "A while back, word on the street was that the CIA lost some encryption key. Maybe we could..."
"That's already handled. Next." Ron shook his head.
"Uh..." Arthur hesitated. "An unnamed NBA player contacted me through back channels wanting us to take out the Lakers' star player, Shaquille O'Neal. The price is pretty generous."
"An unnamed NBA player?" Ron was irritated. "You don't even need to guess - it's gotta be Kobe! That job is absolutely off-limits! Everyone would know who ordered the hit, and once he gets caught, he'll immediately flip on us and claim we acted alone!"
Honest Hank's worldview crumbled. "Boss, aren't we supposed to be a tax collection agency? How can we take assassination contracts?"
"Don't sweat the details," Ron waved dismissively, but his mind was racing, and he immediately thought of a perfect target. "By the way, how's that Barack guy who escaped across the border last time doing? Could we use him as a target?"
"He fled to Brazil and kept running his drug empire, and his operation's even bigger than before," Andy suddenly chimed in, pulling out a file and placing it on the table.
"Seems like he's got connections to some congressman. He's now practically openly shipping narcotics to the US via large cargo vessels, basically monopolizing the heroin trade in all the western states.
Not just the FBI - even the CIA has him in their crosshairs, but they can't touch him because he's bought off the Brazilian police, who are actively helping him smuggle drugs. Word is the current Brazilian president is a link in his profit chain."
Ron picked up the document from his desk. It was intelligence forwarded from the FBI. Andy wasn't exaggerating; if anything, he was underselling it because he wasn't used to intelligence analysis.
Based on the scattered pieces of information in the intel, Ron immediately realized that Barack's actual control over Brazil might be even more extensive than imagined!
While the Brazilian government is the legitimate authority in Brazil, anyone with half a brain knows that the so-called president is just a public figurehead, and the cartels are the ones who really run the show.
They even outgun the police. There have been cases where the police bought new equipment, only to find it in cartel hands before they even got to use it, sparking citywide gunfights.
And this isn't an isolated incident!
How brazen can Brazilian cartels get? Ron can say without exaggeration that if they weren't worried about negative international backlash and fear of other countries forming coalitions to intervene, these lunatics would literally drive tanks into the capital to claim territory!
"Holy shit..." Ron licked his lips excitedly: "Don't you think this is one hell of a big fish? I'm saying, how about we make him our next target?"
"BOSS, have you lost your mind! Even the Brazilian government can't deal with these guys!" Hank's mouth fell open in shock: "If we want to take them on, we'd need at least the Marines and Air Force working together!
This is war! This is WAR! Do you think we can conquer an entire country by ourselves?!"
"Are you feeling okay?" Hank put the back of his hand on Ron's forehead to check his temperature: "You must be running a fever. How about going home and getting some rest?"
"I'm not crazy, and I'm not sick," Ron slapped Hank's chubby hand away in annoyance: "I just think this might be an opportunity."
"Opportunity?"
"That's right," Ron said confidently, pointing to the description in the intelligence: "Don't think Barack is invincible. He's just one of many cartels in Brazil. He just happens to be the strongest right now. Believe me, if he dies tomorrow, a new cartel will step over his corpse and take control immediately."
(End of chapter)
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