Cris crept toward the window, slipper still in hand like it was Excalibur. The sound outside grew louder a harsh scratching, then a heavy thump.
The glass rattled.
Something slammed against it from the outside.
Cris jumped three feet into the air. "NOPE. NOPE. I'M MOVING TO ANOTHER PLANET."
The ants didn't flinch. Their antennae twitched, eyes glinting in the dim light.
"Enemy."
The single word chilled him more than the noise.
Another slam. This time the whole frame shook. A crack spiderwebbed across the window.
Cris backed up, holding his slipper high. "Okay, real talk. Do you ants even know what 'security deposit' means? Because my landlord is going to KILL ME before that thing does"
The glass shattered.
A clawed hand, jagged and black, hooked into the sill. A creature pulled itself into view, insectoid, humanoid, its shell gleaming like obsidian. Six glowing eyes blinked in unison, fixing on Cris. Its mandibles clicked, saliva dripping.
Cris screamed. "WHAT THE F— THAT IS NOT PEST CONTROL SAFE!"
The voices in his head roared over his panic.
"Brace. Channel."
His body jerked forward. Power surged through his veins, his right arm glowing faintly with the same heat in his chest.
Cris flailed. "No no no no—wait—STOP USING ME LIKE A RENTAL CAR!"
But his arm shot up on its own, fingers snapping outward.
The shattered glass on the floor rose into the air like a storm of blades.
Cris's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. "OH MY GOD I'M MAGNETO WITH DEBT!"
The shards hurled themselves at the intruder. The creature shrieked, its carapace sparking as the glass embedded into its shell. It staggered, but didn't fall.
Instead, it lunged through the window, claws outstretched.
Cris screamed again, diving behind the fridge. "NO THANK YOU, I'M A SOFTWARE DEVELOPER, NOT AN ACTION HERO!"
The ants were merciless.
"Fight. Stand. Or die."
Cris peeked out, slipper raised like it would help. The creature snarled, tearing the spoon out of the wall and snapping it in half like a toothpick.
Cris whimpered. "That was my only spoon."
His chest burned hotter. His left hand clenched into a fist ,against his will again and suddenly the tiles under the creature cracked upward, jagged spikes of floor tile jutting like teeth.
The thing shrieked, pinned in place for a moment.
Cris stared at his own glowing hands. "...Okay. That was actually kind of badass."
The ants hummed in eerie pride.
"You learn. Quickly."
The creature thrashed, shattering the tiles, its mandibles opening wide as it prepared to leap.
Cris gulped, looking at his slipper. He whispered to himself, "Alright. Action movie rules… when in doubt, HIT IT."
He charged. Slipper first.
The ants amplified his movement. His arm blurred, strength far beyond human, and when the slipper connected with the creature's head—
WHAM!
The monster's skull cracked, its body flung across the kitchen into the cupboards. Wood splintered. Plates shattered. The entire apartment rattled.
Silence.
Cris stood there, chest heaving, slipper smoking faintly in his hand. His whole body trembled.
The creature twitched once… then went still.
Cris blinked. He looked at the ants. "...Did I just kill a space cockroach with a bathroom slipper?"
The ants' voices resonated like a hymn.
"Together. Victorious."
Cris stared at the wreckage of his kitchen glass, tile shards, cupboards destroyed, a dead alien bug twitching by his sink.
He dropped into a chair, slipper still clutched like a holy relic.
"Yeah," he muttered weakly. "Victorious. And evicted."