"Sarah... Sarah..." She knocked, calling my name over and over.
"Mom, would you please... Please, I want to be alone." I said, my voice was clear yet soft.
The knocking stopped. And no one called me to open the door again.
Inside, my head rested on my knees, arms wrapping around them tightly and I breathed.
Why has this all happened with them? Why? There were no tears in my eyes, nor any resistance to block them; rather, all turned into helplessness.
Suddenly, my mother-in-law called me again.
"Are you awake, Sarah?" She asked while twisting the door handle.
"Hold on a second." I quickly got up from the bed, straightened myself a little, and went to open the door.
I saw my father-in-law standing next to her with a plate of food in his hand. He handed it over, and she, holding my hand, entered the room.
She sat beside me on the bed and raised a spoonful of food to my lips.
"Here, eat something. You won't be able to sleep on an empty stomach."
I didn't want to eat, not today. So, I resisted, but before I could say anything, she put the spoon in my mouth.
"Um! Mom…"
But she cut me off.
"Stop being childish. I'm not hungry, I've already eaten, I'm full, I'm this, I'm that... Enough with those bullshits. Just eat properly and rest." Her voice had shifted from the earlier calmness to something firmer, something intimidating.
"If you don't eat, will your parents come back? If you cry remembering them, will they come back? Will they?" Her eyes were fixed on mine, as if seeking answers from them.
I wanted to respond, but it felt like no answer was needed. I said nothing and quietly ate everything she had brought with her.
That night, she slept beside me. To stop her from worrying, I closed my eyes as soon as I fell on the bed. But sleep didn't take me over, and I remained awake. I turned and stared at the ceiling, reminiscing about the heartfelt moments I shared with my parents.
Seconds passed. Minutes passed. Hours passed… And finally, I drifted into the past.
The next morning, according to my father-in-law's arrangement, we proceeded with the funeral.
It was held in a modest hall adorned with white drapes and lilies which was also my mother's favorite.
One by one, people came to me, expressing their sympathy. Though there were only a few, each was close to my family and a true well-wisher.
One of my aunts approached, her voice trembling as she gently asked, "What really happened, dear? We can't believe… they just…"
"Yes, they were so careful. How could this have happened to them? Did the police find anything?" another uncle asked, stopping beside me.
I nodded politely and forced myself to speak clearly. "The airbags didn't open after the collision. The report concluded it was an accident caused by poor maintenance."
Their intentions were pure, but every question felt like a fresh stab.
"Cough! Cough!" A raspy voice bounced off the walls.
Everyone in the room turned their heads toward the podium, shifting in their seats.
My father-in-law, Brian Sterling, climbed onto the podium, took a deep breath, and began speaking with his heavy voice.
"I haven't known Sirius and Mira for long, but one thing I can say is that, in this short period, we have truly become an unbreakable family... for eternity." He extended his hand toward me and looked.
My mother-in-law, who was standing next to him, called me over. When I went there, both of them hugged me tightly. Perhaps they wanted to lessen my parents' absence.
And now, it was my turn to say something in their memory.
I staggered forward and, with a gloomy voice, said, "My parents... were everything to me. I could always count on them. They don't show it or complain, but they get annoyed with me. I thought they'd be fine living their lives without my stress, but then they just...." I could not continue; my eyes were already filled with tears.
"Sorry, I can't say anymore." With a painful smile, I stepped down.
After me, the ceremony ended soon.
"May God grant peace to their souls." Someone patted my hand, while another hugged me and told me to take care. But when it was all over, they all left... leaving me alone in silence.
It took me several weeks to keep myself occupied with other things. Even so, whenever a memory or incident connected to my parents came to mind, my heart ached.
Days passed by and so did my pain. One day, I got a call from my friend Jennifer.
"Listen, we've planned to go out tonight and you are coming with us."
"What? I am not..."
I hadn't even talked when her phone got disconnected.
I called her back, but she didn't pick up my call. Then, I typed a message to delete it again.
There was no point in doing it or not, since I wasn't going anywhere anyway.
Just as I was about to get up from the couch, the doorbell rang.
I turned my gaze and walked straight to open it.
"You didn't think I'd show up, did you?"