'Isaac' the Merchant was having a slow day which was pretty normal in this line of business, especially so for Merchants who just moved into a new location. Now Isaac was no newbie when it came to peddling his stock, which was evident in how robust his catalog was. He wasn't really lying when he told Jessica that he had a little bit of everything and a little lot of less.
On the off chance that he didn't have something his lovely customers wanted, he was confident in his inventory that he could procure them a more suitable alternative.
Alas, he would have to wait for a while before business really started moving — waiting was never a problem for him. He'd done this a hundred times in a hundred different places and each time was a repeat of the time before.
He was still in the phase of sourcing his goods to his honored customers which was always the slowest part when a Merchant set up a new shop.
"You're going behind a glass, buddy. Let's hope we can get you a new home this time around." He patted the wailing Necronomicon tenderly on its fleshly wrappings.
For a stereotypical book, it gets a lot of bad rep. Human faces crying blood tears stitched to the cover was as much a spoiler as anything could ever get and yet people still act shocked when they read its content, or when it reads their souls. It happens both ways and the little book was a pretty fast reader.
As he walked around his store, shelving and boxing some of his wares, Isaac couldn't help but picture the day when he would get to sell all his supplies. He chuckled, knowing how glorious such a day would be.
As Merchants, they prided themselves in procuring authentic, vintage and the highest quality of goods so they can peddle to wanting customers.
"Now how did you get out of Schrödinger's box? I put the both of you in there for a reason." He sighed tiredly and grabbed the human-sized statue of a female angel that was hiding a bunch of mannequins.
He took the statue to the backrooms, ignoring the flickering lights and the vague shapes hiding behind pillars and went straight to the inconspicuous small box lying on the floor.
He opened the box and started pushing the larger statue into it until it completely disappeared into the box.
"Stupid cat. You only have one job and that's to watch her and you can't even do that. It's not like you do anything else." He grumbled under his breath as he clasped the lock of the box into place and then left it on the ground and went back up to sort out his shelf.
As Merchants, they had a love for everything they paid for but sometimes it was extremely trying on their patience and mental health.
Like having to perform roadside therapy for a tome of parchments that singlehandedly rebranded cosmic evil, only to find out it was just a misunderstood book with autism and down syndrome and that it's skin was a little bit darker than the others. As for the constantly regenerating bursting eyeballs? Well it was a bold fashion statement it tried in order to build up confidence and have a bigger public presence. It's simply aesthetics.
The end result was always worth it but the time between it was a dice roll of relative peace or a constant loop of migraine.
But that was the curse of the trade and any Merchant worth their title would happily receive it with both hands and a smile. They could always trade it for something else.
He went to one of his storerooms and picked up a half opened unmarked package box. The box vibrated in his hands causing him to laugh.
"I'm not putting you on the top shelf, Pandora." He chuckled again as the box hummed. "Don't lower your worth for anything. You are one hell of an expensive box so you don't need to be on a display case. You're in the 'special order' category. Anyone who wants you will come for you and no one else, so just chill in the back for now. Deal?"
The box hesitated before humming a low sound.
"Don't worry, I'm not leaving until I get each and everyone of you a new home." Isaac reassured the unassuming mundane box and put it on the top shelf of the storeroom.
A Merchant, especially a well travelled one like Isaac, knew the bone deep relationship between them and their merch. The merchandise makes the Merchant and the Merchant sells the merchandise. It was a cosmic symbiotic relationship.
Unlike some rookie marketplace peddlers that called themselves Merchants and desperately batter their trinkets at every chance they get, real Merchants would instead spend an ungodly amount of time in sourcing for prime merchandise from the nook and cranny of forgotten realms.
The shortest time old-timer Merchants would spend sourcing up a decent inventory was a century.
Isaac had personally stayed in one location for two thousand years just so he could have a chance at bidding for the weapon of a particularly stubborn warrior after they died. And that wasn't the longest time he spent sourcing for a particular item either.
Naturally, in an egotistical economy like theirs, Merchants were bound to be the prideful sort, but it was in the way they expressed their pride that made it prominent.
Isaac for example could patiently hunt for the stock for his inventory for a hundred thousand years or any exorbitant amount of time as long as he got equal quality goods. And his pride was that any time he was satisfied with his haul and decided to open up shop, he won't go scavenging for supply until he empties his current inventory, regardless of how long it took.
He took his pride in the high quality goods he sold – even his junk was of higher quality compared to others, he did the comparison – and the confidence that he could empty his inventory in record time.
Some Merchants still had items from six hauls ago in the last ten thousand years in their top shelf.
He could not imagine subjecting his carefully procured goods to such a fate. They were Merchants and their one and only job description was to sell anything they could get their hands on.
They did not overly care about the exchange they got from their goods, as that was mostly used as tax for the Union, but that did not mean that they'd sell their goods at a loss. They cared more about the customer getting their hands on the items they wanted than the exchange they received. The exchange was nothing more than the token of the transaction struck, and for when the Union came to inspect their books.
"Both of you will stay here for the aesthetics. It'll make it seem like you guys are a packaged deal." He said to the pair of ebony and ivory cast guns that he kept in the same showcase that he retired Rebellion to. "I shouldn't have to tell you guys how important presentation is."
He picked up an enchanted chessboard and set it up near where his little patch of mutated green grew. He did the same to a pair of pixelated diamond pickaxes. There was order in the way he chaotically showcased his goods.
"I think I've moved them to the backroom." He murmured to himself, shrugged after a moment and simply called out loud. "Any book rocking their human skin winter coat; to the backrooms. Today's aesthetic does not feature human skin as a theme. And keep the madness within the pages, thank you."
Was it weird that books were more likely to be sentient than anything else? Well he stopped questioning things a very long time ago and learned to quickly accept them with whatever weird quirk they came in with. It made for more fun that way.
"Now where do I put you?" He looked at the weird gun in his hands, thinking of throwing it in any direction of the store when his doorbell jingled as someone entered his store.
"Oh, Jessica, it's you. Welcome." He said as he went behind his counter to receive his customer. His first repeat customer.
"Hey there Isaac. What is that?" She gave him a small wave before noticing the weird gun with the bulbous head in his hands.
"This? It's a Null Void Projector." He replied offhandedly as he laid down the gun on the counter and smiled at Jessica. "What can I help you with today?"
She smirked and placed a hand on her hip, looking all smug and proud. "Well, let's just say those little babies I bought proved their worth over. So I decided to see if there is something I could get to pair with them."
"Well, I have a few recommendations—"
"I'm on a budget." She quickly added with an embarrassed flush to which Isaac nodded in complete understanding.
The constraints of budget spending was something Merchants were intimately familiar with.
"Okay, let's hear it."
"What are you looking for? Protection, counter-surveillance, disguise, or perhaps something more damaging?"
She actually took a second when Isaac listed a few avenues she could procure from which meant that she didn't think too much about what she wanted and instead wanted the shop to give her good options. A good customer trait.
"I can take care of myself pretty well so I'm not naked on that front. What I got last time can be counted for counter-surveillance. So that leaves disguise, don't it?"
"One second." Isaac disappeared from the counter to the storeroom behind him and came back in a handful of seconds with a small package in his hands. He slid it over the counter at Jessica.
"A Silicon 'Quick Change' Mask." He said as Jessica picked it up. "Fits perfectly to your face and allows you to alter your appearance. Limited to 3 set profiles that can't be changed after they are set. For the limited-budget option."
Her eyes widened as a wicked smile crept up her face. Three different identities for plausible deniability. Sure three was limiting but that was three more than every other person, with the shaky exception of shape shifters of course.
She was taking it without any question. "How much?"
"One thousand." Isaac replied with a service smile while Jessica winced as that was a little too close to the limit of her budget.
"No discount?" She asked weakly.
"That's the budget-friendly price." He replied and she winced softly.
"Well, no use crying about it now." She shook off the depression in record time, probably taking comfort in how it would make her PI work easier. "So how does this work?"
"There's a plate inside. You'll connect it to your device and send over the image, then you just have to leave the mask on it for a few minutes and that's basically it. You can connect your device to the mask afterwards and change it remotely."
She nodded. "That's easy enough. Thanks a lot, Isaac." He might be some sort of weird dealer/mutant/plug but he was cool in her eyes. Who else sold high-tech spy stuff in a junk shop?
"Not at all. Your patronage here at Junk 'N Stuff is more than enough. Thank you." He said with a soft rebuttal and a smile.
"Damn, even your customer service is top tier. Catch you later, Isaac."
"You as well. You can also refer us to your friends. We got a lot of stuff they might need."
"Sure." She waved him off and left the shop with a soft jingle.
He smiled as she left before leaving the counter and going back to make sure that some things were chaotically arranged to bring out the ambience of his quaint little shop.
Well the day was still young so all he had to do was wait around for the next customer to walk in through the door and let him take another step into emptying his inventory. He had no problem waiting for a long time, he was very patient.
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