"Not so tough without Daddy watching, are you, Cass?"
Killian's voice slithered into my ear like a snake through grass. Low, venomous, and full of teeth. His breath was hot, sour, and way too close. I flinched back instinctively, pressing myself tighter against the cold stone wall behind me, trying to vanish into the shadow of the east tower. No such luck.
Normally, if I kept my head down and my mouth shut, he'd lose interest. Today wasn't normal. I'd embarrassed him in training again. Badly. Not that I did it on purpose. It was just when Father watched, I couldn't help but try. He saw me, really saw me, in those moments. And I'd do almost anything for that. Even if it meant pissing off the golden boy.
"Killian." Reena's bored drawl came from the courtyard. "Quit playing with the bastard and get ready. We're hosting the Shift tonight."
She didn't bother looking at us. She never did when it came to me. Her voice had that usual snide twist, like saying my name burned her tongue. Cassidy, the stain. Cassidy, the reminder. Cassidy, the problem none of them could scrub out.
Killian snorted. "Your lucky day, runt."
And just because he was an asshole, he grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked. Hard.
Pain shot down my spine, but I didn't cry out. That would've been giving him something. I'd rather choke on my own tongue than give Killian one more thing.
He leaned in, his words soft but razor-sharp. "Next time I see you, you'd better have teeth. Claws. Or the Shift might find itself one little bunny short."
And just like that, he was gone. Swaggering off after Reena like he hadn't just threatened to leave me bleeding in the dirt. I stayed crouched against the wall, breathing hard, hair still tangled and scalp stinging.
The few staff wandering nearby made themselves scarce the second his attention turned elsewhere. Cowards. But I didn't blame them. No one wanted to get caught between the Alpha's kids and their punching bag.
I slowly unfurled, checking my ribs out of habit. I'd folded in on myself like I always did, just in case he went for a gut shot. Not that it had helped much. I knew better than to linger after combat class. Knew better, and still messed up. Again.
I just needed a minute. A moment to feel like me before heading back to the kitchens.
Combat class was the only place I ever felt like I mattered. Once a week, under Father's watchful eye, I got to exist. Not as the bastard. Not as the drudge. Just Cassidy. The girl that was fast enough to dodge Killian's fists and smart enough to make Reena eat dirt.
He never said it out loud, but I saw the pride in Father's eyes when I moved. How he nodded, how his gaze followed me like he didn't want to miss a second. I lived for that.
I was good. No, I was better than good. I was lethal. Quick. Sharp. Deadly with a blade. And yeah, I kept one tucked in my boot at all times. Not because I was paranoid. Just prepared. Killian's friends took his threats seriously. I wasn't stupid.
Not that I was a threat to them. Not really. I'd never be heir. Hell, I might not even be predator. If I took after my mother's bloodline instead of Father's. Life got a lot smaller for prey shifters.
I blew out a breath, raking my fingers through my hair, trying to fix the tangled mess Killian left behind. Couldn't show up looking ruffled. Not in front of Mom. Her eyes missed nothing, and I'd never been a good enough liar to pretend everything was fine.
The old bell tolled through the air. Its deep, echoing clang announcing the start of evening prep. Shit. I was late.
I bolted.
The kitchen was a frenzy by the time I skidded through the back entrance. I nearly plowed into a frazzled server balancing a tray stacked with raw meats. Steam curled from massive iron pots, and the air was thick with spice and sweat.
Mom stood at her station like a general at war, a knife in one hand and a root vegetable in the other. Her hands moved with mechanical precision. No wasted motion. No hesitation. That was where I first learned blade work. Not from war, but from her. She taught me how to cut fast and deep, how to never let a blade slip.
I dropped into position at the wash station, groaning at the mountain of dishes already overflowing from the basin.
Of course they left it all. No one ever wants boring jobs.
I twisted the spigot handle and was grateful that our part of the compound had running water. Most of the village still had to haul it by the bucket. One small mercy.
Around me, other shifters bustled. Mostly prey-types like me, or at least like I might be. My stomach twisted at the thought. Tonight was the Shift. My Shift. My fate sealed in one full body transformation, courtesy of the Moon Goddess. If I shifted prey then my chances at freedom, at anything better than this, vanished.
I scrubbed harder.
"Back with us, Dish Queen?" Indra's voice was bright and soothing. She bumped my hip with hers and dumped a fresh load of pots into the basin.
I smirked. "Obviously. Where else would the real party be?"
She laughed, tossing her dark braid over one shoulder. "Kristian's driving everyone crazy. He's convinced he's gonna shift into a bear. His whole family's mice, Cass. Mice."
I grinned, but it didn't reach my eyes.
She tugged lightly at my hair, gentler than Killian ever would be. "I'm rooting for you. If anyone deserves a miracle tonight, it's you."
I stilled, glancing around. "Indra, don't say that so loud. If anyone hears you talking about them…"
"I'm not scared of them."
"Well, I am." I said quietly. "You know how this place works. They don't just make examples of bad shifters. They make examples of good ones. The kind that gives people hope."
Her smile dimmed. "Then shift predator for us. And don't forget about the rest of us when you do."
I hesitated, scrubbing at a stubborn pan. "My mom had a predator once. The highest predator. Didn't change a damn thing for her. I'm still here. Still scrubbing dishes. Still the bastard they wish didn't exist."
"You're not nothing." Indra's voice was fierce. "You could never not exist, Cass."
I nodded once, tightly.
"Are you still meeting us after the feast? At the gates? We walk down together?"
"Wouldn't miss it." I forced a grin. "I'd rather be with people I actually like."
She patted my shoulder and slipped away.
I turned back to the sink, my hands raw, heart thudding like a war drum in my chest. I wasn't meant for this. I wasn't meant to disappear into a life of trays and chores. I wasn't born to be prey.
Please, Moon Goddess. Let me be something else.
Let me be more.