Chapter 6: Is It Because I'm Not a Hot Guy?
"Ugh… I'm so full! No, wait, I'm gonna burst!"
Jashin-chan flopped onto her back with a total lack of grace, her stomach bulging. She propped herself up with one hand on the tatami mat and looked pitifully at Yurine, raising a trembling hand for help.
"Yurine, I need some digestive aids!"
"Don't have any."
Yurine glanced at the demon's belly, which looked like she was several months pregnant, and deadpanned, "It's your own fault for eating so much. You deserve it."
"B-But it's because Ryohei's cooking was too good…! Damn you, Ryohei, this is all your fault!" the scumbag snake declared, shifting the blame and baring her fangs at him.
Ryohei was so speechless he almost wanted to punch her himself.
"The only reason you've survived this long has to be your immortality, right?" he retorted. Without it, she'd surely be long gone by now.
"Huh? What's that supposed to mean?" Jashin-chan's brow twitched with annoyance, feeling like she was being provoked.
"It means exactly what it sounds like!"
Unable to watch this any longer, Yurine stood up, walked over, and landed a heavy fist on Jashin-chan's head, nearly knocking her flat.
"Oww… that hurts! Yurine, you're always protecting him!" Jashin-chan yelped, clutching her head and grumbling.
"Hmm?"
Sensing Yurine's murderous aura, her body went stiff, and she immediately pretended to be an ostrich.
"Ryohei-kun, would you like a go?" Yurine offered, suggesting he also let off some steam.
To her surprise, Ryohei was actually tempted. He stood up.
"Don't mind if I do!"
He cracked his knuckles and began walking toward Jashin-chan with a mischievous look. Jashin-chan looked up at him, her face a mask of disbelief that quickly darkened.
"Hey, what do you think I am, a punching bag? First you, then him! I'm telling you, don't push me too far, or I'll really fight back!"
As she finished her threat, Jashin-chan put on a brave face and showed off her sharp fangs, as if to say, Even if I can't win, I'll bite you to death!
"Who's pushing you? You have absolutely no self-awareness!"
Ryohei threw a punch that connected squarely with Jashin-chan's head. He immediately felt a wave of refreshing satisfaction. He wasn't normally the type to hit people, but Jashin-chan was just so incredibly punchable that it felt wrong not to.
"..." The punched Jashin-chan didn't even flinch. She just stared at Ryohei, her eyes turning into little dots from sheer surprise, before a triumphant grin spread across her face.
"That didn't hurt at all!"
"Hahahaha~! Your power level is five!" she crowed, having confirmed that he was, in fact, just a regular, physically weak human.
My status in this household just went up by one! Jashin-chan thought, feeling a surge of confidence.
"..." Ryohei's mouth twitched as he watched her roaring with laughter. The physical damage was zero, but the emotional damage was critical. That little…!
Yurine glanced at Ryohei, then reached out and grabbed Jashin-chan's head in an iron claw.
"Your laugh is hideous," she said, squeezing.
"Ahhh—! It hurts! It hurts! My head's gonna crack! Let go… Yurine!"
When it comes to dealing with Jashin-chan, you really have to rely on Yurine, Ryohei thought, his mood instantly improving. Happiness is truly built on the suffering of others.
"..."
After sufficiently reminding Jashin-chan who was boss, Yurine released her and turned to Ryohei. "Ryohei-kun, would you like to go for a walk? To help digest?"
"Sure," he nodded.
Since Jashin-chan also needed to digest, the two humans and one snake headed out the door together.
Downstairs, Ryohei looked back at the apartment building. It was an old, two-story complex, just like in the anime. He remembered that in the story, a cheerful and energetic Minotaur lived on the first floor, raising demonic creatures in the courtyard. Right now, though, the courtyard was empty. Perhaps she hadn't started yet.
Yurine didn't find his looking around strange at all. It was normal. If their roles were reversed, she would be just as curious about her new surroundings.
They left the apartment complex and began to stroll down a street bathed in the warm, yellow glow of streetlights. A gentle evening breeze swept by, caressing their faces like a soft hand and bringing with it a refreshing coolness.
Yurine glanced sideways at Ryohei. "So, what are your plans now?"
"Um," Ryohei stopped surveying his surroundings and looked at her sheepishly. "First, I was hoping to borrow some money to rent a food truck and start a small business…"
Asking to borrow money was always awkward. Ryohei hated borrowing from others as much as he hated lending. But he had no choice; life forced his hand.
"Also…" he said, pointing to himself. "I'm probably an illegal resident right now. I don't suppose you could help with that, could you, Miss Yurine…?"
If she couldn't, he was in big trouble. His plan was to save up some capital and then open his own restaurant. How could an illegal resident open a shop? If he was found out and they tried to deport him, there was nowhere to send him back to. What a mess.
"Hmm, the money isn't a problem… and the ID issue shouldn't be too hard, either. I'll ask my family about it," Yurine said. Her family ran a local shrine and had some social connections. Getting him a temporary ID wouldn't be difficult.
She clapped her hands once, deciding to see the job through to the end. "I have a relative who owns a restaurant, and they have a food truck that's just sitting there unused. I'll ask to borrow it for you later. And I can lend you… 50,000 yen for seed money. Will that be enough?"
"That's enough!" Ryohei said quickly. A food truck plus 50,000 yen was more than enough to get started.
Yurine breathed a sigh of relief. Any more than that and she'd be tapped out. She had a decent allowance and a part-time job, but she spent a lot on all sorts of random things and also had to support Jashin-chan, so her bank account wasn't exactly overflowing. She was glad Ryohei could be self-sufficient, otherwise, it would have been a real headache.
"You can stay at my place until we get your ID sorted out," Yurine added. "And when you're working, I'll have Jashin-chan help you out. She can be your bodyguard, too. By the way, have you thought about what you want to sell?"
"Not yet, I'm still thinking about it."
Yurine is seriously an angel! Ryohei thought. He'd always thought he was into older, more mature women, but suddenly he was thinking that cute goth-lolis were pretty great, too.
"Hey! Don't just make decisions for me!" Jashin-chan, who had been trailing behind them, wiggled her tail and slithered forward quickly. She leaned in close to Yurine's ear and said in a ghostly whisper, "Yurine, you treat this traitor and me so differently! Is it because I'm not a hot guy?"
"It's because you're always trying to kill me!" Yurine retorted, clenching her fist and resisting the urge to punch her again. This demon had absolutely zero self-awareness. She was just asking for it!
"Tch—!"
Sensing Yurine's murderous intent, Jashin-chan wisely retreated. She wasn't an idiot; she wasn't going to stick around to get beaten up. Yurine's fists really hurt. If she weren't so tough, she'd be crying on the spot.