Julian hadn't planned on fighting goblins today.
In fact, all he really wanted was to decode a few mysterious scrolls and maybe not get cursed by any ancient ghosts. But fate—and the redhead currently torching everything that moved—had other plans.
"Duck!" Lira shouted.
Julian didn't hesitate. He hit the ground as a fireball soared over his head and exploded against the far wall, blasting a pair of goblins into unconsciousness—or at least into very aggressive naps.
He rolled behind a fallen table, clutching his spoon.
"I thought you said this place was abandoned!"
"I said *mostly* abandoned," Lira snapped, blasting another green-skinned creature as it lunged from behind a curtain.
[Correction: These are Lesser Tunnel Goblins. Subspecies: Cranky. Weak to fire. Immune to sarcasm.]
"Why are they even here?" Julian yelled, blocking a thrown rock with a shaky mental pulse.
[Possibly squatters. Possibly summoned. Possibly attracted to the scent of your fear.]
A goblin charged at him with a rusty knife. Julian pointed his spoon and let out a panicked shout. Mind Pulse rippled forward, knocking the goblin off its feet and into a bookshelf, which promptly collapsed on top of it.
Julian peeked over the table.
"That worked?"
[Yes. And you hit a combo: spell plus environmental damage. 1.2x multiplier. Congratulations, gamer.]
Julian stood up shakily. "Why does this feel like I'm leveling up in a bugged video game?"
[Because it's easier than admitting you're still fighting goblins in a robe.]
Lira was wiping soot off her gloves. "That's the last of them."
Julian counted the bodies. Four knocked out, one possibly unconscious under a pile of dusty alchemy books, and one... still twitching.
He kicked that one lightly. It stopped.
"Why do they even *come* to a magic tower?" he asked.
Lira shrugged. "Goblins are drawn to mana sources. They chew on magical junk like rats with lightning issues."
Julian wrinkled his nose. "Gross."
\[Also, fun fact: goblin blood can be used as ink in cursed scrolls.]
Julian stared into the air. "Please stop educating me."
Lira dusted herself off and started checking the remains of the scroll room. Most of the shelves were charred. The few intact books were either locked with glowing glyphs or covered in slime.
"This one looks usable," she muttered, yanking out a cracked leather tome.
Julian glanced over her shoulder. "That's... upside down."
She flipped it, unfazed. "I was testing you."
"Sure you were."
He sat down against a still-smoking bookshelf and pulled out his card. The faint blue glow had brightened slightly.
"Is this normal?" he asked.
[Yes. You're syncing with ambient magic. It's like free Wi-Fi, but more dangerous.]
"I love how everything here has the possibility to kill me."
[Love is a strong word.]
Julian stared at his spoon for a moment. Then at the glowing lines on the floor beneath his boots.
"Uh… were those runes glowing earlier?"
Lira looked down. "Nope."
The entire floor began to vibrate slightly.
Julian looked up at her. "You triggered something, didn't you?"
"Maybe."
A loud, grinding sound echoed from below. Stone against stone. Then the far wall slowly slid open, revealing a spiral staircase descending into blackness.
Julian pointed at it. "I'm not going down there."
"You are."
"Nope."
[You are.]
He sighed. "I hate you both."
[We know.]
Together, they approached the dark stairway, every instinct in Julian's body screaming to turn back. But he stepped forward anyway, spoon raised like a sword, Lira beside him with her gloves beginning to glow.
Somewhere far below, something ancient opened its eyes.