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Chapter 663 - 14

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Rating:

Explicit

Archive Warning:

Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Category:

F/M

Fandoms:

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild/Tears of the KingdomThe Legend of Zelda & Related FandomsThe Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of TimeThe Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask

Relationships:

Linkle/OcPurah/OC

Characters:

Linkle (Legend of Zelda)Purah (Legend of Zelda)Impa (Legend of Zelda)Paya (Legend of Zelda)

Additional Tags:

Self-Insertgamer systemPathfinder 1st EditionPOV Original CharacterAUBotw But with things from previous gamesAlternate TriforceSmut

Language:

English

Stats:

Published:2024-01-03Updated:2025-04-10Words:123,102Chapters:27/?Comments:83Kudos:433Bookmarks:223Hits:33,272

Legend of Zelda: Bard of the Wild

Flameclaws

Chapter 14: Pitstop

Chapter Text

I do not own anything.

'thought'

"Speech"

"Text via book or newspaper... when those are around..."

System Text

My arms stretch above my head as I let out a quiet yawn, rain pouring down on my body from above.

"Ah... that was fun." I grin mischievously, I sit atop a large rock, gazing out upon dozens of floating bodies swaying in the ocean waves. "Oh, by the way, That one over there's still alive."

Linkle who is sat next to me, follows my finger towards one of the bokoblins floating in the water, it lays on its back, seemingly in a daze.

"Why don't you kill it with your zappy lightning?" She questions.

"Well, Linkle, because I'm just the tiniest bit absolutely fucking exhausted after I changed the very weather itself."

"Heh. I know." The girl snorts. "Just trying to annoy you."

She raises her crossbow and shoots a single bolt. It sails through the air, sinking into the bokoblin with a dull thud.

A quest has been completed!

I nod once. "That did it."

We sit there for a long moment, gazing out over the crashing waves, my arm eventually finding its way around her shoulders.

She leans into my touch, the smallest of smiles tugging at her lips.

"It's nice to have brief moments like this to take a break in the chaos." I admit. "To really just... relax and take in the sights."

"Hyrule is quite the beautiful place." She agrees with a slow nod. "It'll be more beautiful once the calamity has been taken care of, though."

"True. True." I agree as she lays her head on my shoulder.

Bokoblin Beatdown:

Objectives:

Destroy the Aris Beach Bokoblin Camp: [x]

Bonus Objectives:

Kill all of the Bokoblins: 80/80 [x]

Face the Golden Bokoblin in sole combat: [-]

Singlehandedly destroy the Bokoblin Camp: [-]

Reward:

20000 Exp, a sole item worth up to 16000 Gp.

Bonus Reward:

5000 Exp, 1 Bonus Stat Point.

Not enough to level up, but I suppose the true reward here was the stat point... which is going into my... Dexterity.

I had been neglecting that part of my body, focusing primarily on strength. With one point, it'll match my constitution at a nice fourteen.

As for my item? I'll... pick it out later.

I slip out of the cuddle, rising to my feet, arms stretching above my head. "You think Purah is done tinkering?"

"Should be." She nods once, standing up alongside me.

I hop off the rocks, landing gracefully down below.

I glance back up just in time to see Linkle leap off after me, but, she hasn't trained in the sheikah arts thus her leap is a little bit more clumsy.

I catch her in a bridal carry before she can hit the ground however, her arms wrap around my shoulders after a moment, then I begin walking over towards where Purah parked.

"It's crazy that just the three of us were able to take down something that it's likely an army wouldn't have managed to." I smile. "Though I guess we had a lot of advantages on our side. If they had decided to live anywhere else, I doubt we could have done much."

"They really doomed themselves making their home out above the ocean. Not even on an island. Just precariously balanced upon large wooden beams." Linkle agrees with a sole nod.

"What was once their greatest security became their downfall just because we got the jump on them... if they knew we were here, it's likely that fight would have gone a lot different." I note.

"Mhm." The blonde agrees. "They could of simply just rushed us. We got lucky. No doubt about that."

"Sooo." I continue. "I noticed that you sped up a little bit after that jump."

"Huh? I- everything did seem slow..." She mutters under her breath.

"That was the temporal magic you told me about?" I question.

She nods slowly. "I guess? I should... really figure out how to control that. It'd be a great help if I could do it whenever I wanted."

"It would." I agree. "Also. A feature of our masks I should probably mention... things that you are good at, I will become good at, rising to match your skill, and the same for you. Thus, we should experiment a little bit with the Sheikah arts I know. They could be useful."

"Oh! And I can teach you how to shoot a crossbow!" The girl beams.

"Huh. You know what, that does sound fun." I agree.

She shifts slightly in my arms, planting a kiss on my cheek.

My face flushes slightly as a smile works its way onto my lips. "You are going to utterly shock your princess once this calamity nonsense is over and done with."

"Eh. I was already planning on asking her to join in on the little thing we've got going on." She admits proudly.

"Linkle." I deadpan with a half-lidded stare.

"What? The Hyrule Family's royal bloodline needs to continue somehow! And I'm not about to let some random person do the deed with her. It's either you or bye bye monarchy."

"I don't think she'd like us talking about this." I continue. "Let's postpone this conversation until she's free, hm?"

"Okay!" The blue eyed girl beams.

We eventually come to Purah who is sat in the buggy, seemingly doing so merely to get out of the rain, she appears deep in thought, a golden monstrous arm sat in the passenger seat. It appears to have dribbled some blood into it as it laid there, but the blood seems to be mostly dry now.

Let me just say, that arm was a bitch and a half to retrieve. But luckily I have Mage Hand, so it was a lot less difficult than it could have been to nab.

She looks over as she hears us approach. "Ah. You are back. Are the stragglers taken care of?"

"They are." I nod once.

"Good. Get in. I need to run something by the two of you." The scientist announces as I place Linkle's feet back on the ground.

"What is it?" I ask as I step forwards, awkwardly crawling into the back of the buggy and quickly drying myself off with prestidigitation.

Linkle plops down into my lap a moment later, which was totally expected as a severed arm is currently occupying the front passenger seat.

I dry her as well, slipping my hand up under her extremely tight shirt, eventually my hand finding itself under the bandages she had wrapped over her chest to prevent her nipples from showing through her Shiek Armor.

"Before we go to Vah Sarin. We should go to Kakariko."

My eyes flick to Linkle's who shrugs.

"We're fine with that." I agree. "Why are we going back."

"Golden Bokoblins." The woman whispers. "Hyrule is changing... and Impa needs to be made aware as soon as possible."

I nod slowly.

"You could also de-age her, right?" Linkle asks. "Like you did for yourself?"

"Oh, I already planned on doing that. We need as many capable hands as possible to fight the Calamity. Age might not have affected what I originally did much, but it is far more crippling to a martial artist." She continues as she glances back to the two of us. "Thus, we'll follow the beach until we reach the Sheikah Vault. Go around the mountains, then head up Hylia Bridge and back through Twin Peaks and into Kakariko itself... then we will return to Vah Sarin."

"I should also be able to find other leads on Divine Beasts during our downtime." I nod slowly. "I might not know the names, but they are numbered, so I could very well ask for something like the location of 'Divine Beast Fifteen' or something." I add in.

"Good. Let's go." Purah nods once as she faces forwards yet again.

The engine rumbles to life, then we tear off down the beach.

It took about a day and a half of travel, but we arrived at the Sheikah vault... or rather, the keyhole. A space that looks exactly like that large hole in the ground the orb from Kakariko Village was placed into.

The only thing is that we have genuinely no idea where this sphere could be.

Purah crouches at the hole, her hands placed upon the worked stone. "Hrn... now... where could you be?"

I gesture over my shoulder into the distance where a small trail of smoke raises up into the sky. "That's probably the place. If it's bokoblins, they probably liked the way it looked. If not bokoblins, we can always ask the people there if they have seen anything."

"That was my plan as well." Linkle adds in with a shrug.

"It's... pretty much our only lead." Purah agrees. "I'll stay here and look around. I'll see if I can locate it if it's buried under the sand somewhere close by."

I offer her a thumbs up then abruptly turn and walk away.

We silently walk along the beach, not exactly trying to be sneaky per se, just not actively drawing attention to ourselves.

After around five minutes of walking, we come to a small campsite.

A brown haired woman with twin-tails kneels before a large circular stone, hugging it and rubbing her face against it. "Oh Rosco... I love you so much!"

There's a small crack of a twig somewhere behind her.

"WHO'S THERE!" She snaps, whirling around, a savage glint in her eye, she draws a sword. She has large bags under her eyes, it appears she hasn't slept in days.

Linkle and I slowly turn to look at each other.

"Holy shit, she is fucking crazy ." I whisper.

"How do we deal with that?!" She whispers.

I cup my chin, eyes narrowing slightly.

I sit there for a long moment... quietly plotting.

The crazy woman lets out a small sigh as she shakes her head, turning back to the large sheikah object, rubbing her face upon it. "Ah well, must have just been my imagination."

"Your skin is so smooth, Roscoe! I love it! I love you! Give Loone a big kiss!"

"Alright. Hear me out."

"No..." Linkle begins, eyes narrowing slightly, already seeing where this is going from a mile away.

"What if I took the sphere's place for a bit?" I continue.

"Aurum." The blonde deadpans.

"No no, hear me out. She is bat shit crazy. She won't say agree to us using her 'precious' to open a door, thus we need to do a classic bait and switch. I distract her a bit, then you swipe the sphere and I'll entertain her for an hour or two. At which point, you come back with the sphere after you got all you want from the vault, switch back, then we can move on with our lives."

"There's other ways we could do this." She protests.

"Do you suggest killing her." I deadpan.

"No!" She hisses.

"Beating her unconscious and taking it from her?" I continue.

"N-No."

"Using magic to break her mind over my knee and order her to give us the fancy Sheikah rock?" I ask.

"C-Can you?!"

"No." I shake my head.

"Ffffine. But I'm not happy about it." The girl growls.

I begin taking off my shirt.

"W-What are you-"

"Getting into character." I explain bluntly.

I hand her my bag, then my sword. "Here, you can take that for now."

"Let's see here." I mutter under my breath, casting 'Disguise Other'- a misleading name, as it can do both yourself and others- on myself.

My body glows as my skin darkened into a deep tan color, glowing orange lines criss-cross my torso, my normally red eyes change to a brilliant orange.

"This look good?" I ask, my voice slightly deeper.

Her eyes lock onto my chest before she shakes her head. "I- ah- whatever. It's fine."

I nod slightly and with a wave of my hand, I cast a spell on the other side of the campsite.

The woman stands up as I cast haste upon both myself and Linkle.

"Stay here Roscoe. I'll be right back." The crazy woman begins.

With that we both silently lunge forwards, before she can turn, Linkle grabs the massive stone ball, I take a seat in its original place, then she waddles away.

I quietly cast glibness on myself.

After around a Minute of carefully searching the horizon, the woman turns back around. "Once more, just my mind playing tricks on me!"

"Don't worry Roscoe you're safe- WHO ARE YOU?!"

I look to my hands, the glowing marking brightening slightly.

"Loone?" I whisper. "It's me... Roscoe."

"..."

The girl cups her chin for a long moment her eyes narrowed. "Hmm..."

Her tired brain seems to be desperately trying to load what this means.

As if a kitchen timer, a bell seems to ring.

"OOOOOOOH!" She exclaims, stars in her eyes.

I sit there, staring up into the sky.

Huh.

My head turns as I hear a twig snap.

Standing there is Linkle with a large stone orb.

I look down to the sleeping woman curled up in the sand beside me as the blonde hero creeps closer and closer.

She sits the orb down as I rise to me feet.

The genuinely INSANE girl lets out a small groan of annoyance at now lacking the heat my body was supplying.

With that, Linkle and I turn, quickly rushing off back the way she just came.

"Was it worth it?"

"Pardon?" I ask.

"Fucking that girl?" She growls.

"I'm going to stop you right there. I actually didn't."

She turns to me, eyes lightly narrowed. "Are you fucking- her CLOTHES were off!"

"Oh, don't get me wrong, she tried, and I was tempted, and was planning on it at the start of that entire scenario but then I thought that it might hurt you... so, instead I sang her a lullaby and she was so tired that she collapsed in the middle of trying to get my pants off. Besides Why would I want to bang some random girl I just met when I have you'?"

She looks away with a small blush.

"Also. We should probably talk about our general relationship. We're- technically- married, right? How exactly is our love life going to be? I mean, we double teamed Purah that one time... so I can't say that we are strictly monogamous. Plus, you've literally told me to fuck- and knock up- your other best friend literally like two days ago. So. Let's hash out details now, alright?"

"If I give you the okay. You can bang whoever you want, whenever." The girl eventually relents after a long moment. "But. And this is a big but. I want to be your first priority."

"Done. You're hero two. Connected to me by a magic mask." I agree instantly as I reach out and take the Sheikah armor shirt Linkle offers me, quickly slipping it back on. "Also, I do care for you, y'know."

Next I take my sword, which I slip on my back.

"You aren't one to normally resist your urges like that. I'm proud of you."

"Thank you, Vivi." I roll my eyes as I take my bag back as well.

"So, did you find anything interesting in the little vault?" I ask.

"Nope. Just a bunch of spare parts and a bunch of disabled guardians."

"Did you look with the mask of truth?"

She opens her mouth, then freezes, letting out a quiet sigh. "Damn."

"Do we need to go get the orb again?"

"No, No." She waves off. "Purah connected the door controls to her Sheikah Slate after we got inside. That's what took so long."

"Oh, good." I hum as we make it back to Purah's little mad max creation.

"Purah, can you open the vault again? Linkle needs to take another look with her mask to see through illusions." I call out as I look to the white haired woman crouched over the front of the vehicle, the hood is open, her rear stuck up in the air and making it look mightily slapable.

She lets out a low hum as she glances over. "Oh? Alright. I'm almost done with a few minor wear and tear repairs, so make it quick."

She turns towards a nearby boulder, then holds out her sheikah slate.

The ground rumbles and shakes as the boulder rises from the earth, revealing a hidden elevator large enough to even hold Purah's new vehicle.

We both turn and walk towards the elevator and step inside.

Linkle waves her sheikah slate over a large terminal inthe corner, slipping the Mask of Truth onto her face.

The platform underneath us rumbles as we begin drifting down. The walls in front of us slowly move as we go deeper and deeper.

"WAIT! TEXT!" Linkle shouts pointing dead ahead.

"I can... See it?" I mutter.

Well, I mean, technically Linkle is being affected by the mask of truth, right? That's a beneficial effect.

My eyes skim the text on the wall as we slowly go deeper and deeper.

"Alright. So do you want to hear the good news or bad news?"

"Bad News?" The girl cautiously begins.

"This place is a prison." I answer.

Her head slowly turns to look at me. "Pardon?"

"It's a prison." I repeat.

"It looked nothing like a prison when Purah and I was in here. Just storage!"

"Duh." I roll my eyes. "it's likely that the true entrance is hidden. Y'know. Like that hidden 'safe' pathway into Sheik's vault."

"Hm." She hums mutely. "What about the good news?"

"Ah. Well. I know where another Tri-Force piece is... Here." I gesture downwards.

"In a prison." The girl repeats.

"Yes."

"oh no." She sighs. "So, what is it this time?"

"The Triforce of Wisdom. So, like, the mirrored version of the one Purah has, the Triforce of Knowledge." I answer with a cheerful hum. "My only worry is that... if this is a prison... and the Tri Force is still here, reasonably whatever holds it is still alive and well in here."

"And, if it had been Imprisoned by the Sheikah, reasonably the thing that has it won't be a good thing."

"Probably." I nod once.

With a low hiss we reach the bottom of the elevator, we walk out into an expansive room.

Honestly... it sort of looks like an amazon warehouse.

Long lines of metallic and stone shelves holding springs and other parts, we walk forwards, peering around cautiously.

"So... this is what powers Guardians?" I question as I look to a series of large sphere with a disconnected gear ring around it. It frankly looks a bit like a gyroscope.

"Yeah. It's pretty interesting." The blonde beside me hums. "Purah spouted a bunch of techno buzzwords the second she saw them. Something about upgrading her little thing outside once she gets time? It was honestly such a treat watching her get excited like that. She looked like a little kid!"

"Damn. Now I'm sad I missed it." I frown as we come to the other side of the room.

"Huh..." I mutter as I look around slowly. "There's... nothing?"

"Maybe in another one of the aisles?" The blonde to my left suggests.

We walk in opposite directions, beginning to look around more thoroughly

We scower the room for the next five minutes or so, eventually Linkle's voice echoes out in the room. "Hey. Aurum? I found it."

I quickly make my way over, coming to a stop beside her.

She gestures upwards.

"Ah." I mutter as I stare almost straight up.

Up at the very top of the wall, just slightly below the ceiling is a simple rectangular hole in the wall.

Linkle takes off the Mask of Truth, the second she does, the wall becomes whole again, now lacking any sign of a deeper pathway.

"Huh." I mutter. "I mean, that's pretty well hidden."

"Mhm." Linkle nods. "You won't just accidentally bump into it and figure out its an illusion. Heck, even knowing it is there, I'm still sort of wondering how the heck to get up there."

She's right, it is pretty high up. About thirty feet.

"I could jump." I shrug. "Got any rope? Or I could try and carry you?"

She wordlessly clambers onto my back; her arms wrap around my torso causing me to roll my eyes. "Alright. Let's see if I can do this..."

I quickly turn and run to the other side of the room.

I pause at the wall for a moment before turning, a long breath leaves my lips as I gaze upwards.

With a sudden nod I lunge forwards, feet merely a blur. I clear considerable distance in mere moments.

As I near the opposing wall, I leap, my body rising from the earth underfoot entirely as I kick off a nearby shelf.

This second hop gives me just enough height to reach the edge of the new tunnel, my hand lashes out, fingertips grasping around the lip.

I hang for a second, then with a small grunt I place my other hand atop the ledge and pull myself up.

A small relaxing breath leaves my lips as tension leaves my body. I stand up, Linkle climbing off my back and giving my cheek a quick kiss.

"Thank you!" She smiles.

"No problem. Getting down will probably be a bit of a pain, though." I sigh as I turn and gaze downwards.

A long staircase seems to lead deeper into the earth. From what I can see here, it goes far behind the lowest point in the room we just came from.

A Quest has Been Received!

My eyes stray to the side.

Darkest Wisdom:

You are on the trail of one of the Triforce Pieces. The Triforce of Wisdom. It appears that something truly vile was sealed in a hidden prison centuries ago. What could have happened? Why has the Triforce of Wisdom, something that predominantly resides in the hands of the Princess here of all places?! There is only one way to find out.

Objectives:

Find the hidden passageway within the Sheikah Storage Vault: [x]

Fully Explore the Nocturn Evernight Prison: [ ]

?

?

Reclaim The Triforce of Wisdom: [ ]

A frown tugs at my lips as I share a look with Linkle.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I eventually question.

Linkle stares down the steps for a long moment. "I... Yes. We should grab this triforce of wisdom."

"I think this might be the case of 'The Mind is willing, but the Flesh is weak'." I observe. "Instead of asking if you want to, it would have probably been better if I asked if we SHOULD do this."

"What do you mean?" Linkle asks.

"Alright, so, you remember how Purah said that the Triforce of Knowledge allows her to look back at all the previous deceased wielders?"

"Yeah..."

"That means Triforces regularly pass from wielder to wielder."

"I'm following." The girl continues.

"Thus, the fact that this one hasn't moved on and gotten a new host..."

Her mouth screws shut, her lips forming a flat line. "OH."

"Whatever has the Tri-Force of Wisdom... is still very much alive. not just mummified remains we can take the power from." I finish my thought.

Linkle's eyes stray along the walls as she begins to think deeper. "And for the Sheikah to imprison it instead of merely killing it..."

"Likely means." I pick up where she left off. "That they either couldn't kill it. Or didn't want to. Thus we are likely dealing with something on Calamity Ganon's level."

"..."

"Ah." The girl mutters. "Shit."

She bites her thumbnail gazing down the stairs.

"We... We should still look, right? Just a bit of scouting. If we don't touch anything... it'll be fine, right?"

A long sigh leaves my lips as I turn and begin walking down into the depths. "If we unleash a second calamity, I'm using whatever minutes we'd have left alive to breed you. I mean, we're making one mistake, why not another?"

We walk deeper and deeper into the carved stone staircase.

After around five minutes of Cautious walking... I hear it.

*Bum-di-bum-bum-bum-diki-bum*

Drums... I can hear drumming.

"..." A quick glance to Linkle shows that she can hear it as well.

We continue downwards, further and further, the sound growing louder and louder as we descend.

Eventually we come to a large opening that seems to be leading into a room of some sort.

The floor vibrates and moves, not being made of stone, but some sort of leather. The walls appears to be lined with large leather drums. Elsewhere in the room large, rounded metal plates hang from the ceiling.

Linkle looks around in confusion, the drumming noise coming from all around us.

Clearly Linkle doesn't see it yet. As she isn't frozen in terror.

"Oh... Oh Dear... that poor soul." Vivi whispers. "What could have prompted the Sheikah to torment it in such a way?"

On the far side of the room is a figure.

Oh believe me, not just any figure, it has dark skin, either some grey or black, frankly a little difficult to tell with my monochrome night vision.

But the skin tone is by far the most normal thing about this... thing .

First off, the sheer size of this thing. Its lower torso disappears up into the darkness of the ceiling, but what parts I CAN see? Oh my god. It's utterly titanic, probably standing well over fifty feet tall if I had to estimate its height.

It is humanoid in appearance, hung from its legs- if it even has any- from the ceiling. I hesitate to call its form 'humanoid' as there's just something uncanny about it. First off, it has four arms, a second set of limbs seeming to extend off its shoulder blades, a notable thing about all four of its arms, however, would be the fact that every. Single. One. Has their hands cut off at the wrists.

Said hands are floating around the room, beating on the various drums.

This thing's head is... unnatural, it looks like an unbloomed flower.

Terror grips my body as the drumming abruptly stops.

Linkle stiffens as I can assume she sees it now.

There's a sickening crunch as the figure arches slightly, it apparently was facing away from us, its back clicking and cracking as it bends back towards us.

The flower blooms revealing a large red orb that glows in the darkness.

I grab Linkle's wrist, turn around and run up the stairs as fast as I am physically able.

My terrified heartbeat is thankfully joined by the drumming of whatever the fuck that was.

That means it isn't following us.

"Whatthefuckwhatthefuckholyfuckingshiti'mgoingtothrowupwhatthehellisthat" Linkle mutters, obscenities leaving her mouth in a flood of word vomit.

The quest I had just received flashes across my vision. Another quest objective is revealed.

Defeat the Tormented Protector, Congo Bongo to gain access to the innermost parts of the Prison: [ ]

Fuck that. Wisdom is the most boring of the three triforce pieces.

Eventually we make it back to the main room. I wordlessly grab Linkle and hop off, sliding down the wall to the floor below.

Now that we are mostly home free, Linkle tightly grabbing me as I make a break for the elevator, she lets out a small squeak. "W-Was that what had the Triforce of Wisdom?!"

"No, Linkle... that was a FUCKING Guard." I state as repeatedly push the up arrow on the elevator.

"A GUARD?!" The girl shrieks. "W-WHAT?!"

"I-If... that is just a gatekeeper... what is it keeping?!" She whispers. "That thing was HUGE!"

"Gigantic." I agree with a low whisper as we begin to rise back up towards the surface. "Vivi do you have any form of explanation?"

"It appears to be a conglomeration of tortured souls." She states. "The real question is... what is it guarding and, perhaps more importantly why is it guarding? That just doesn't make sense. A spirit like that would have no reason to remain in one sole location. It would desire to do nothing more than to inflict the pain it experienced on others... unless... Did... did the souls willingly subject themselves to this? To face a demise so truly agonizing and mind breaking all to become a twisted monster? What could possibly drive them to go to such lengths?!"

"That is... worrying. To think that they would do that to themselves... merely to contain whatever else is in there." I whisper. "We need to get to the bottom of that. But not now. We have got our hands full with Calamity Ganon."

"We will return later." Linkle agrees.

Light begins to shine through the cracks of the elevator as we return to the surface.

"Purah, GOD FORBID you enter the secret area in this vault. I will make you regret it." I snap as I come out of the vault.

The white-haired woman looks up. "Pardon?"

Her eyes flash briefly, realization slowly pooling in her vision. "You are... You're scared ? What did I miss?!"

"You ever see a fifty foot tall corpse with its hands cut off playing bongo drums?" I ask.

"..."

"What?"

"Get in the car. This will take a hot minute to explain." I sigh, my shoulders slumping.

Hello Bongo Bongo, a pleasure to see you again! It appears you've gotten a TOTK new coat of paint like Gohma, Gleeok, Molgera and the Gibdos.

I wonder what other things are out there... lurking... just waiting to be found?

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